Unmarked Alpha

Chapter Two

Blake’s POV

I keep telling myself that I don’t have a right to be angry, and while I know that it’s true, I can’t help the way I feel. I hurt Charlie so badly that randomly I can feel her pain through the mate bond. It jumps up on her. She randomly relives the pain and sometimes it feels so overwhelming to her that it’s debilitating. Even when she thinks I don’t know, or that she’s covering it well by blocking her wolf and minimizing our bond, I can still feel when that happens. I can also see the signs. She holes up in her room, or only wants to talk to Quinn, and now her mother that they’re dealing with their own issues.

I know it’s selfish of me to be angry. Damien worked really hard to be someone she can trust. They’ve come so far, and he didn’t go back and then try to hide things from her. He’s done is best to respect her, and her feelings, this whole time. I know I’m the one who keeps pushing her away. Who keeps breaking boundaries and crossing lines, so why am I so angry?

I run to the edge of the Pack, fighting off angry tears. My wolf is growling and snapping at me in my head, telling me that this is all my own fault. That I pushed Charlie away and tonight is proof of it. Now I might lose her forever because she won’t even mark me.

‘You’re right’ I tell him, digging my nails into a tree as I try to steady myself. ‘I’m an i***t. I get it, okay? But I can’t go back and change things.’

‘That’s why you should listen to me in the first place, so that way none of this would have ever happened’ he barks back, our pain lacing his voice, even in my head.

I just shake my head, trying to keep the tears from pouring out. I have no right to feel like this. I know I don’t. So… why can’t I stop myself? Am I this selfish? This self centered?

To try to take my mind off my thoughts, I start running in the woods as I fast as I can. My wolf puts our wall up, trying to spare himself from some of the pain, I think, so I can’t shift, but I can still run. My bare feet pound into the ground, and it feels good. The dew soothes any scratches I get, and the cool night air makes me feel alive.

I stay conscious of our borders, not wanting to see Savannah, or especially Damien, right now. I just can’t deal with it. Savannah spent so much time tonight trying to soothe me. To make me feel okay with what happened. I don’t want to see that piting look on her face again, and Damien… I shake my head roughly, nearly making myself fall. I just can’t see him at all right now.

So, I stay in my own Pack’s borders, running and keeping watch. The Patrol waves to me a few times, clearly confused as to why I’m out, and not shifted, but I don’t slow down long enough to fill them in. Besides, I don’t need to drag anyone else into this. These are my feelings that I need to work through. No one did anything wrong. I’m just being an asshole.

Eventually, as Dawn begins to encroach on the sky, I turn to head back to the Pack House. I’m exhausted, and I know I have a lot to do today, but I can’t go to sleep because I have to be there when Quinn wakes up.

When I walk into the house, the smell of coffee hits me almost instantly, and I feel some of my tension leave my body. It’s a warm, comforting scent. Maybe because when my father drank coffee was when he seemed the most happy. I immediately throw that image from my mind. I don’t need to think about anymore complicated and complex relationships right now.

“Good morning Alpha,” a young Omega girl says cheerfully as I enter the kitchen. “Would you like a cup of coffee? It’s fresh.”

“Yes. That would be great,” I mutter as I lean against the counter, looking down at the floor and the trail of dirty footprints I tracked into an obviously freshly mopped kitchen.

“Here you are. Just the way that the Luna says you like it,” the girl says with a bright smile, not even mentioning my lack of manners or how I made her clean floor all dirty.

I take the cup, sipping on it. It is the way I like it. When did Charlie let them know? I do rarely drink it. After a few moments, when she’s back to cooking, I set the cup on the counter.

“Aren’t you going to say anything?” I ask.

“About what, Sir?” her questions, her brows drawn together in confusion.

“The dirty footprints and mud I tracked in. Aren’t you going to say anything? I didn’t even apologize?” Why am I bringing this up? I never apologize to Omegas. “Or the fact I didn’t even have basic manners and thank you for the coffee?” I never do that either. She’s an Omega. She’s below me. The help.

The girl looks down at the floor, then shrugs slightly. “It’s not my place to question you. I’ll just clean it again before I head off to school. It’s really alright.”

I look at her for several more moments before grabbing the cup of coffee and walking out of the kitchen.

Charlie would have wiped her feet before even entering the house. Charlie would have said please and thank you to the girl, and still apologized if she got even a drop of dirt on a freshly cleaned floor. Even Damien would have said thank you. Savannah probably would have said please and thank you, and apologized too, but not wiped her feet. Why am I the only one that can’t show respect to people below me? Isn’t that something Charlie resents? I can fix that. Why don’t I?

As I’m spirally, feeling almost like I’m high with the way my mind is racing, I hear Charlie’s foot steps upstairs. It must be time to wake up Quinn.