Lifeless

It is raining hard so the usual routine at times like this is to stay in bed all day. However, I felt a brief vibration from my phone. I was about to ignore it kasi malay ko ba kung 8080 lang 'yon but my instinct is telling me that I should check it.   "I am right outside your house. I need to tell you something." And that's what the text says. I really don't know if I should be delighted na madalas tama yung instincts ko or what. Mukhang mas okay pa nga yata na 8080 na lang ang nagtext, I don't mind kahit na expired subscription ang content — I would prefer that over a text like this.  "Okay." I immediately put my jacket on since I know that it is windy outside. I also brought an umbrella in case I need to stay out for quite some time. I do not mind kahit na I am wearing pajamas right now. The only thing that I have been thinking of is to get this over with — na matapos na agad kung anuman yung sasabihin niya kasi I couldn't handle any more of this fear of the unknown. I locked the door to my apartment and it is a good thing na may bubong sa may entrance ng apartment. There I saw him, fidgeting, obviously showing signs na he's nervous — although, I am hoping na nilalamig na lang siya.  He is wearing a gray jacket over his white shirt, black shorts, black cap, and black slippers. He might have felt my presence kasi he suddenly looked at my direction. And there goes that few-second-awkward-stare, but he broke that stare and walked towards me. "Ano ganap? Maulan tapos mambibigla ka ng pagpunta." He slightly smiled. "I'm sorry. Natutulog ka noh?" "Malamang." And I know na we were just attempting to do small talks kasi we are both nervous to open the conversation about what he is about to say.  "Ano kasi..." Please, do not let this be something na big deal. Please, do not let this be something that would be an issue. Please, just let this be something that I can laugh off. As he ran his fingers through his hair, there he said it. Those words that I have been wishing not to hear from him. "I like you, Nicole. I really do." FUCK.