Suicide

Chapter 15

|1 month later|

                                                                                          •OAKLYNN•

Throwing my head back as Kairo rubbed my feet I let out a deep sigh.

"I really needed this". I said with my eyes closed.

"You know I love you right". He asked causing me to open my eyes and look at him.

"Yeah and I love you too why are you asking me that". I ask holding my stomach as I sat up.

"I just wanted you to know that just Incase something happened to me". He said and I stared at him.

"What's going on talk to me". I ask grabbing his hand and he dropped his head.

"I don't want to be here anymore and I try and try to tell myself that I have something to live for but something is just telling me to kill myself". He said as I made him look at me.

"This is what you have to live for now this is who's going to love you and look up to you more than anyone". I said grabbing his hands and placing them on each side of my stomach.

"Sometimes I just feel like nobody's there for me and I know you are it's just I can't really explain it". He said placing his head on my stomach.

"Why didn't you ever talk to me about this". I ask looking down at him.

"I didn't want to lay my problems on you and then you told me you was pregnant and I couldn't stress you out". He said lifting his head up and looking at me.

"I understand that but I'm your girlfriend I want to know what's going on with you especially if you're talking like that".I said as he kissing my hands.

"Come on I'm taking you somewhere". I said standing up and he did the same.

"Where we going". He asked as we walked out and to the car.

"Just sit back and ride". I said starting the car up and pulling off.

|30 minutes later|

Parking and cutting the car off I look over at him and see that he was asleep. I then reach over and start rubbing his face just admiring him. And as I look at him I can't seem to understand why he doesn't feel like anyone's there for him.

"Baby wake up". I say shaking him a little bit and his eyes popped open.

"Where we at". He asked looking around before looking back at me.

"We are at the beach get out". I said opening the door and getting out grabbing the blankets before I closed the door.

He walked over to my side of the car and grabbed my hand before walking towards the beach.

Once we found a good spot he took the blankets from me and we took at seat.

"So why we out here". He asked looking over at me.

"I feel like this is a calm place that will help you forget about your problems for a while". I said grabbing his hand and playing with his fingers.

He nodded before looking out at the water in silence and it was like that for a while as we enjoyed the sound of the ocean water hitting the shore.

"Sometimes I want to kill myself". He said out of nowhere causing me to look over at him.

"Why would you do that". I ask and he shrugged looking down.

"I don't know I mean I try to be in a good mood and seem happy but it seems like it's just something that won't let me". He said with a sigh running his hand down his face.

"Have you been to see a therapist". I ask rubbing his back.

"Back when I was younger and a few times throughout high school but that s**t didn't work they put me on some pills but they made me feel weird so I stopped taking them shits". He said looking over at me.

"I'm here for you with whatever you need and we can get through this together I'll always be there for you". I said and he nodded his head.

"I know but that's not what I need and to be honest I don't know what I need". He said looking off as I stared at him.

"It'll get better I promise". I said leaning in to give him a kiss.

"I hope so". He said before rubbing my stomach.

After that we just sat in silence.

Hopefully this baby will change how he views life...