RESIGNATION
1020 Words
I have always been a giver, warm and loving. Even as a child I never cried, seeking to make others happy. Often people sought me in times of trouble and I gave all I had - my whole heart and showered love upon them. By age nine adults leant on me, told me of their woes and I was their spark of light. Yet when my time to suffer came, when my world was a hurricane of ice, every light but one switched off. All but one offered a love, my first love the person i married later on my beloved husband. he became one light to follow, no choice but to walk toward love and truth. little did i know perhaps the road toward heaven feels like hell.now that he's gone I can tell you I never felt more empty in mind, body or soul, never so bereft of any comfort. I have never felt so worthless or disposable, never so wretched and cold. For hours I would have no emotion, only an urge to move fast; then all at once I'd be on the floor, shaking with a grief that bled from my bones. Days became weeks and months, and in every single moment of every single day my soul asked God why I must still live. why? when my husband and my child my cherished ones are gone. Moments of emptiness still come like an ambush.
i was numb. i stood at the top most edge of the beautiful spiral staircase of the mansion. the spotlight was pointed on me and everyone eyes was directed towards me. switcting back to reality i forced smiled and silent seemed to engulf the room. there were people, all dress in black..was there a dress code or something? my mind wandered. it seemed like i was the only one dressed in white porcelain. for a moment my vision got blurred by the shining spotlight aimed at me.i saw lucifer awaiting me at the bottom of the stairs with his hand held out for me and his flawless grin. "come on, my darling we don't have all day!" he remarked and the whole room started bursting with laughter on lucifer's dry humor. i half smiled and walked down my heels clacking on the staircase wood. ever so gently lucifer took my hand and without warning kissed me, earning loud gasp from the crowd. i pulled away and stood still..my eyes watery..he harshly pulled me closer and clenched my waist. "immortals of HELL, i as your sole King, present you my girlfriend- ah..ah..ah wait lemme correct..soon-to-be your queen Roseangel" i froze and so did the other people in the room..there was pit silence i turned and looked at lucifer who was grinning like mad man.."what the hell lucifer! are you completely insane" i whispered. he stared at me and smirked. "no my dear, ive never been sanest in my entire immortality." shock was plastered to my face as he took out a ring from his pocket and forcibly slid it in my middle finger.people were silence..."DO I NEED TO REPEAT MY SELF! CHEER UP YOU SONS OF B***HES" he roared. i flinched back in fear. that was the silence was replaced with the deafening sound of clapping and hooting.
this is it! i cant take it any more! with all my strength i pushed him back and ran back to the room. my whole body shivered with trauma when i locked the door. "HELP ME LORD! HELP ME PLEASE I NEED YOU!!" i screamed in despair and agony. "WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS PUNISHMENT! FORGIVE ME GOD PLEASE FORGIVE ME I WANNA GO BACK HOME!" i cried. i was desperate. there was knock on the door.i quickly hid in the closet and put a hand on my mouth to muffle my cries." roseangel! roseangel...are you okay!" for a moment i was confused. i got out and wiped away my tears. " who is it?" i asked through teary eyes."open the door darling! its me." wait..is..is that..... my husband! "Sebastian..my love..is that you!" i called out. "huh..just open the door darling i'm here for you!" with a glimer of excitement i ran towards the door and flung my arms on the person i love the most. " my love, i missed you so much!" i tightly hugged him."please dont leave me! i've been thorugh nightmares i dont know whats happening!" i said my closed and tears freely flowing. soon he hugged me back and held me..i was soothed by his touch." i wanna get out of here..please take me to home.."i cried miserably. after what seemed like foreever i stopped crying and put my head on his chest as he rubbed my back.
"roseangel"
"hmm"
"im so sorry to do this to you!" i was quiet.
"do wh..what?"
just then i felt a sharp pain in my abdominal. The knife met flesh, soft and pudgy, and made a satisfying squish as the tip of the blade sank deep enough to make me scream in pain.i could feel the coldness of the blade tearing my skin to shreds and my muscles and nerves being gouged..i could know feel the blade being pulled out. i staggered backwards and snak to my knees and screamed in a convulsing and painful manner. my vision got blurred and my body now fell to the ground. i placed my hand onto my stomach and could feel the metallic blood gushing out. black dots started to appear before my vision and the world around me got slow i turned my eyes towards the person in front of me and was bewildered to see the familiar odd eyes gazing pitifully at me with a glint of remorse. why..lucifer? ...my darling its your only way to heaven..your sacrfication..i have fallen in sinful love with a mortal..this is your only ticket to heaven...it was like i was in a dream..what is going on?...i will miss you roseangel...the pain will end soon! I heard the last traces of the person i despised the most..heaven! am i really going to heaven. just then the darkness engulfed my existence and slipped once again into nothingness.
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resignation(n): departure
- Writer
