The Wolf in Sheep's Skin

Chapter 46

The next two days were busy. Full of dresses, fabric, customers, and sewing. I continued to work on Quinn’s gown at night till my fingers ached and I couldn’t hold the needle any longer. Quinn’s ceremony was in two days, and the house had been set into a flurry.

I’d arranged for the shop to be closed tomorrow, ensuring I’d have the entire day to work on her dress. Not that I needed it. The gown was technically finished, but I wanted to have enough time just to be sure.

The sun was still bright in the sky as I drove home down the long dirt road. I hummed to myself, tapping my fingers on the wheel as music played. Quinn had been picked up early from the shop by our mom. They were prepping, talking about décor and the menu and other event planning things.

Dirt blew up on the road, and I slowed, preparing for the turn up ahead that was technically our very long driveway. My gut churned and my brakes squealed as I stomped on them, flinging myself forward in my seat.

Jay’s truck was nestled amongst the pines, just past the turn. He was leaned against his truck with a massive toothy grin spread across his face as we locked eyes.

F*ck. What is he doing here? What do I do?

It was obvious by his grin why he was here. Waiting by my house. In plain sight, where I was bound to see him on my way home.

My heart pounded in my chest, and I eyed the road ahead. I could keep going. He’d get the hint.

I pursed my lips and glared at him. He was in blue jeans and a white shirt the was almost too bright in the sunlight. His hair was tussled back. He cleaned up before coming here. My heart skipped a beat and I cursed myself.

He pointed to a cleared area near his car where mine would fit. He planned this. He’ll follow me if I leave. I have to shoo him away. I winced and pulled into the spot.

My ears rank, sharp and piercing. I took a deep breath, hoping to stop my shaking hands. It didn’t work, but it cleared my head enough to allow me to get out of the car.

I slammed the door and pursed my lips. He stood up, away from his truck, coming closer.

“Hello, there.” He purred. “I was starting to worry I’d be here all night.” He stopped at the front of his truck with the toothy grin still plastered on his face.

I mustered all my strength and scowled at him.

“I almost didn’t stop.” Somehow, I managed to keep my voice steady. He raised a brow and chuckled.

“Mad at me? What, for being gone? My apologies, I had to handle some… witch stuff.” He shrugged. “Did you get the flowers at least? I warned the delivery man you have a sharp tongue and a quick hand. Might’ve scared him a bit.”

I thought back to how the man had run away, and almost chided him. But I stood up straight, steeling myself so my voice wouldn’t quiver.

“I threw them away.”

His face dropped and he frowned, blinking at me. It was technically true. I did throw the empty box away. And the flowers had sat in the trash for a few mere moments. Not that he needed the technicalities.

“You… threw them away?” He asked, blinking at me. My stomach ached and I forced my face to remain steady.

“I thought I’d made myself clear. You know, when I ran away.” I breathed through my nose, and swallowed the stomach bile that came up.

He shook his head and frowned. He opened his mouth, but his voice caught in his throat. F*ck. He does care. He cleared his throat and looked out into the woods.

“You’d just told me about having a fight with your family. I thought you were shocked maybe. Surprised? Overtaken with emotion? I thought you needed space, I… I didn’t think you meant to end things.” He met my eyes. Pain swirled in his green eyes. It was clear, even from a distance.

I wanted to comfort him. To tell him things were fine, that I was making some cruel joke. But I thought of that day. Why I’d ran. It hurts now, but it would hurt so much worse if…

If he saw my wolf. How out of control she is, how blood thirsty. This is only a small blip of pain compared to what would happen if he had to handle her. Or if the pack found out and decided she’s too dangerous to allow to stay around.

Icy tendrils climbed up my spine and I nearly threw up. Instead, I sucked in a deep breath.

“There’s nothing to end.” I spat the words out, like they were the vomit that wanted so desperately to come up. But it was too harsh. To eager.

I could feel it as soon as the words left my lips. He flinched, tensing all his muscles while hissing in a breath through his teeth.

D*mn it, Gwen! You’re making this worse than it has to be!

“Like h*ll there isn’t!” He shouted, leaning closer to me, his cheeks turning red. “Do you really feel nothing for me? Should I remind you that you kissed me!” He growled out the last words, taking a step closer.

If my feet were working, I might’ve climbed back into the car. Warmth spread through me, and butterflies fluttered in my stomach. He really cares so much? On odd satisfaction bloomed in the back of my mind.

I shook my head, trying to clear the cloying sensation. But it was like a lingering, clinging cloud, making my mind hazy.

“It doesn’t matter!” I snapped.

“Of course it does! Did the kiss mean nothing to you?” His voice quivered, and his pain rang through.

My core ached and my thoughts were foggy. I clenched my teeth together, squeezing my eyes shut. My skin itched and I growled, knowing the sensation too well.

Stop it! I’m in control! This is for the best! I snapped at my wolf. But my head remained hazy.

“Yes! I mean no!” I let out a loud, frustrated growl and flung my eyes open. “It meant nothing!” I shouted, looking him in the eye.

But his eyes lit up, and he tilted his head up, a smirk curling the corners of his lips.

“That’s a lie.” He whispered, in a thick, gravely voice. Copper glimmered in his eyes, a mischievous look crossing his face. I squirmed under his gaze, my cheeks warming.

Rage burned in my core, and I let out a growl from deep in my chest.

“It doesn’t matter if it’s a lie! We can’t be together. It’s that simple, and you should respect my wishes!” I snarled, straightening my spine. I met his eyes, challenging him.

His eyes narrowed and the muscles in his neck stuck out as he clenched his jaw. Tension crackled in the air, thick between us. But I knew he was kind enough, respectful enough, not to force me if I made myself clear.

“Are you worried about what Olivia said about you climbing rank in the pack? Is that why you’re doing this?” His face scrunched up and I tensed.

“That’s none of your business. It doesn’t matter why, I’m telling you we can’t be together.” I hissed and turned on my heel. He’s making this harder than it needs to be! He just needs to listen!

I stomped and reached for my door handle, but his hand grasped my arm. Scorching hot pain shot up my arm. I gasped and pulled my arm out of his, snarling at him as I turned to him.

Our eyes locked and my heartbeat so fast I feared it would burst. He stood over me, nearly pinning me against the car. But there was space. A gap, just enough to feel his warmth but be able to move away.

Our faces were only a foot apart. Pain swirled in his eyes and copper shined through, harsh against the dark green. I leaned against the car, using it to keep me up. My head swirled and the pit in my stomach grew deeper, wider, consuming. Like it would swallow me whole.

“What Olivia thinks or says shouldn’t matter, you shouldn’t be letting her influence you like this. It isn’t good for you or your wolf.” He growled out, his words slow and calculating.

“You don’t a thing about my wolf!” I spat out.

“I know she’s dominant, and for some ridiculous reason you insist on hiding it! You should be proud of your wolf, showing off your dominance to the pack! Not hiding, pretending to be submissive!” He shouted, his face turning red. I flinched, pressing myself against the car away from him.

Ridiculous? Proud of her? Showing her off? He knows nothing, and he thinks he can tell me what to do! Red hot rage coursed through me like liquid fire, scorching my inside. I tensed, locking eyes with him. I curled my lips, snarling, and a deep rumbling growl left me throat.

“And what will that get me? How many dominant females are there, Jay?” I shouted, growling. “None! All the most dominant wolves are male. All the high-ranking females get their rank from their mates!” I hissed, all my muscles tensing, stopping myself from shoving him.

He leaned back, the tension loosening from his shoulders.

“It didn’t used to be like that. There used to be just as many dominant females as males, if not more, but the witches k*lled them when they were hunting the shamans.” He glanced over me, his eyes softening. “Maybe that’s changing.” He whispered.

I groaned and rolled my eyes.

“And how did those women fair? In all the packs I’ve lived with, all the most dominant females were mateless. And they weren’t even that dominant! It’s obvious the world isn’t built for us.”

“Then you haven’t been to any of the packs with female Alpha’s.” He growled out, leaning in. Female Alpha’s? He has to be lying. I opened and closed my mouth, blinking at him.

“Well, all the men I’ve met haven’t been fond of finding out I’m dominant. Who the h*ll wants a dominant woman for a mate?” I jabbed a finger in his chest, growling as I leaned in.

His eyes widened and he leaned back, his lips parted.

“I would.” He whispered. I froze, and all the blood rushed from my face. His eyes darted over me, and an odd choking rumble came out of his throat.

Is he suggesting we’re mates?

My heart sank into my stomach. My blood went cold, and my hands went numb. Everything froze and the edges of my vision blurred. My breath caught in my throat, and I couldn’t make myself breathe.

He can’t be.

A sinking, sickening feeling grew in my gut. Like the earth would swallow me whole. Trapping me in eternal darkness.

It would make everything so much worse. If my wolf freaked out, losing control. Rampaging, going on a k*lling spree. Him having to handle it, having to handle his mate.

My mind blanked, my vision blurred, and my body threatened to crash to the ground.

I pressed myself against the car, biting the inside of my cheek hard. Blood rushed into my mouth. But it worked. The darkness around my mind ebbed, and I wobbled a bit.

Jay was frozen in front of me. Pain spread across his face, palpable.

“You’re afraid of me?” He whispered, the words barely audible as they left his lips. He scanned my face, and pain radiated through me, like a knife had been stabbed into my heart.

I thought of the moment in the kitchen, when he’d nearly run off, thinking I was afraid of him. The fear everyone showed him, thinking he was some heinous monster.

He’ll leave me alone. My heart pounded in my chest. I knew the pain of seeing fear in people’s eyes. My father, watching me come covered in blood. The way everyone flinched when I commanded Bridget. Like I would spring on her, ripping out her throat.

My heart sank, knowing how much it would hurt him. But things would be so much worse later if I didn’t say it now.

Afraid of you? No. Afraid of hurting you?

“Yes.” I whispered, meeting his eyes.