(English) When the letters fade.

"I thought I would be happy in this job" Trent thought to himself. Not really sure if he said that out loud or just thought about saying it out loud. Its been 5 years in the same client care consultant position at the Mark&Satchells Investment firm where slowly they have been draining the life out of him.  Some days he cant even remember how he got there. Mark&Satchells is a well known , respected , huge investment company with their head offices in the heart of Centurion on the outskirts of Pretoria, capital of South Africa. Everyday he gets up, look out the window of his shitty apartment in the heart of Sunnyside and for a second curse the heavens for not allowing him to die in his sleep. After ten minute of senseless reminiscing he unwillingly gets up jump into the shower get dressed and after carefully trying to avoid his landlords empty small talk makes his way to his parking spot in the basement , where his notoriously unreliable Volkswagen is waiting for him.   Everyday in painstakingly slow traffic  he tells himself "Today I'm gonna quit that fucken job!"  but he already knows, like the day before, this would not happen.  After what seems to be a lifetime in commute , he finally get to the parking lot of Mark&Satchells. Sitting in his busted up Volkswagen, he skip to  his favorite song, Superman by Eminem, the most vulgar song on earth and his playlist, but this is part of his daily routine before entering the office,  which he refers to as "Middle Earth".   See this song is the only way to hype him up for the shittiest day ahead of him and also gives him courage to ask out the admin assistant, Candice.  "Today is the day superman "he whispers to himself while fixing his eyebrows in the mirror of his blue VW,, knowing well that he is too much of a wimp to go ahead and do it, ask Candice out that it. But it wont hurt to dream.  Hesitantly he gets out of his car after blazing all kinds of vulgarity on his stereo at full blast, put on that corporate face and proceed to the entrance.  Just as he was about to swipe his access card he realize that he left his access card next to his phone in the car and quickly jogs back to fetch it. The thought of having to make small talk with the security guard just takes out that last bit of energy from him.  "How many times can you actually discuss the same f*****g soccer team ?" he thinks.  After making sure his got everything he proceed to the entrance to the office where Ricky his loyal pal , probably the only person he likes in this entire building ,  is also busy signing in.  He smiles and wave at Ricky  "Hey bud, I see your also late , as usual" he jokes .  Ricky turns around , visibly hungover, eyes bloodshot ,lips chapped, looking like the undead, confused then he recognizes Trent  "Maaaaaaaan where were you last night" completely forgetting they are now in the foyer  and completely NOT alone.  "I had the craziest night of my entire life" Ricky now whispers after realizing they were surrounded by colleagues and clients alike..  This is how almost every story starts with Ricky, carefree irresponsible yet brilliant Investment Consultant. Ricky is the type that will perform at an optimum level with only one hour of sleep.  He is always at the best parties with the best socialites and dj's .  "f**k I envy your life" Trent says while thinking about how empty his life is currently.  "Bro you NEED to come out with me tonight" Ricky says, his breathe still reeking of tequila.  "You must be crazy, how the f**k are you gonna be able to do this again tonight"  knowing very well Ricky already has an answer to this question.  "I live in the now my friend, tomorrow is a given to no wimp" Ricky cheekily replies . Knowing that this is a jab at the current state of affairs in  his own life, Trent decides to shock Ricky today.  "You know what , f**k it, what time are we doing this s**t I'm way overdue a night on the town" Trent says boldly.  Ricky looks at him bemused and shocked "Are you serious T ?"  Ricky asks visibly shocked.  Trent now already regretting his decision, decides to put on a brave face and proclaims  "Is there any reason for me to be scared, I'm doing this, email me the details you degenerate!"  They share a chuckle and proceed to their different desks. "I'm gonna need a strong cup of coffee today" he thinks before placing his laptop bag on his desk.  As he enters the kitchen to get a nice strong cup of coffee, there she is , right in front of the f*****g coffee machine.  Wearing a black ,tight pencil skirt showing every curve of her body , semi high heels making her calves look like some s**t out of a p**n flick he thinks. A white formal shirt with just enough buttons unbuttoned to reveal the top part of her bra. Her hair short and curly with earrings just a bit too big for corporate office attire.  Yes, Candice was a specimen to behold, in a very innocent way.  Before he could redirect his gaze to ANYTHING else , she turned around and caught  him drooling over her . Somehow he knows he should stop looking , but he's like a deer caught in headlights!   "Hey Trent ,getting your morning fix?" she said.  For a second he thought she knew about that time he sniffed coke in the parking lot after a long night out.  "Huh , fix, me...wait what ?" it felt like he was watching himself fail again by means of an out of body experience.  "Coffee ? " Candice said, slightly confused.  "Oh , yes...no other way to get the day started" he murmured. "Well, see you around T Rex" she said smiling while sliding past him in a now packed kitchen. He tries to act cool , but the bulge in his pants might be disloyal to this cause. "Damn I really wanna f**k her so bad" he thought to himself while regretting yet another missed opportunity to ask her out.  For a second it felt like everyone in the kitchen knew exactly what he was thinking. "How much longer can i keep this up "he thought as he pour the coffee over his hand , chuckling while thinking about his almost visible erection at the same time. "At least I can look forward to tonight " he thinks, not sure if he should be excited or scared at the thought.