Disgraced by One, Desired by the other

Lyra's POV "I'm deeply sorry, Luna Lyra...we did all we could, but we couldn't save your pup," the pack doctor said solemnly. "The silver already got to your womb before we could act—” I held up my trembling hand, signaling for her to stop. My mate, Alpha Jake, wrapped an arm around me,sorry… pulling me close to his chest. "My moonray, I'm so sorry... I never meant for this to happen.” "It's not your fault," I managed to get out. I lowered my palm to my abdomen. The coarseness of the bandages brushed my skin as I rubbed my tummy, struggling to believe my baby was no longer there. "Doc...will I ever be able to conceive again?" I choked out, holding back tears. Jake squeezed me tighter. "Moonray, please...let's focus on your recovery first and—” "Doc, please answer me!" I raised my voice above my mate, sending the wardroom into silence. We all knew what the doctor's answer was going to be, but I wanted to deceive myself a little longer... between the gap of my delusion and her response, I could still nurture hope. "No," her reply pierced deeper than any silver dagger could dream of. "If you didn't have Alpha blood, you wouldn't have made it this far...your entire body has been damaged by the silver; your organs, bones... everything internally appears like you've aged ten years.” I gulped, pulling my face from Jake's chest. "I'm guessing that's not all of the goodnews yet,right?" The pack doctor nodded, confirming my suspicion. "We ran some crystal X-rays on you," the pack doctor said, hesitating and slowing down her words; these crystal X-rays could sense auras and spirits. My heart throbbed as I awaited the final blow, to see how badly my inner wolf was wounded. Jake held me as though I'd wither away when the doctor delivered the news: "Normally, when we have patients who have been injured with silver, the aftermath is a broken connection with their inner wolves; some become permanently disabled in their wolf forms...the X-rays give us a clue on what can be worked on...but on yours..." She inhaled deeply. "There was nothing.” I wanted to cry, but instead a shackle escaped through my lips and transformed into full-blown laughter. Both my mate and the pack doctor were looking at me as though I had lost my mind, and yet the laughter continued. "I wasn't quite sure why I was, the pack doctor said, hesitating and slowing down her words; the corners of my eyes were burning with unshed tears, yet all I could manage to do was laugh. I laughed until the mighty stitches felt like they were going to rip through my flesh. Jake held me all through; I think he was saying something, but I couldn't quite hear him through the wall of laughter. Fifteen minutes later I was quietly staring into space, still unable to grasp that this nightmare was my reality. A Luna had two responsibilities: justly leading beside the Alpha and bearing pups that would carry on the name of the Alpha family. Now I was completely incapable of doing both. Without my wolf, I was no different from an Omega, but that wasn't the worst yet...my pup...my precious pup. I was already eight weeks along...why?! Why?!! "My moonray, I can't stand seeing you like this... especially since this is all my fault!" Jake said and burst into tears; I stared at his face, rippled with sadness, feeling a strange sense of envy. I wanted to be able to cry too and steal even the smallest bit of relief. I was drowning in grief, yet I couldn't even catch my breath for a second; I clasped his cheek. "This isn't your fault, Jake; you didn't ask to be kidnapped...and if I could go back..." My whole body trembled. "I'd save you a million times over.” Jake hugged me close, and the waterworks went off. I stroked his back, finding our scenario a little funny. Shouldn't I, the one reeling in more physical and emotional pain after losing both her wolf and pup, be the one weeping my heart out? I should be used to this; after all, I was always the strong one in every relationship. My parents and siblings had been slaughtered in a rogue attack when I was just a pup; with my back against the wall, I shifted into my wolf, a massive, silvery being that could be best described as destruction walking on four paws. I blacked out and woke up surrounded by the corpses of my enemies. "I don't think we were properly introduced last night.” Those were the first words Mirage, my wolf, said to me. "The name's Mirage. This is the first time I've been awakened by someone so young. What's your name, little one?" Mirage was an ancient wolf blessed by the moon goddess, and she chose me, a five-year-old, at that time. Such a thing had never happened as far as I know. A search party from Moonfang found me, and I was brought back home. With my parents deceased, Uncle Eugene, my dad's brother, took on the mantle of leadership, acting as the regent alpha until I was old enough to claim the position of Luna. Everyone was floored by the news that I'd awakened my wolf; the earliest for most was at best 10 years. I was handled like an egg and fondly nicknamed the Emerald of Moonfang on account of my alluring green eyes. Growing up I never got a chance to be unhappy or lonely because the whole pack became my family along with my remaining biological one, Uncle Eugene and his daughter, Kelly. Eleven years passed by in the blink of an eye, and at sixteen I was old enough to rule by pack law. "It's true you have come of age..." Uncle murmured when I brought it up to him, "But you'll need a mate; you can't rule on your own yet." Mirage had growled within me, as she was always protective of me. "You're more than capable already, but if you must..." I'd never heard of a spirit wolf being against mating; Jake never really grew on Mirage. But now he was all I had; I snuggled into his arms, watching my whole world fall apart. "Jake, can you stay with me tonight?”