I sigh. I don’t know what to tell Blade. This is personal and I don’t want him to know how deep the crazy goes. I realize with a start that his opinion matters to me. I look at Dancer and Bear. I care about their opinions as well.
“Okay, it is hard for me, so please don’t mock. I know it will be hard to believe, but I’m not a good liar.”
They all look at me like I sprouted a second head, but they restrain themselves.
“Go on,” Blade encourages me.
“I can’t lie to others, unless I believe the lie. What you saw with the Seeker… tearing my shirt was for show and manipulation, but the rest wasn’t. The rest was genuine affection. I made a conscious choice to play the good guy to your bad, but it meant I had to believe to my core he was my friend and I was his and I did want to save him. I’m
