New Feelings

I don’t often spend much of my time outside- I usually liked to be coped up and well hidden from the sights of other pack members, however, something compelled me to come here tonight. It perhaps could be the moon- the way the light beams down and lights up the lakes is astonishingly beautiful despite the alluring darkness that is all around me. The way it hits my skin sends prickling shockwaves throughout my body, that of joy, peace, and perhaps even acceptance. I took a deep breath in and stared longingly at my reflection, “Do I really have to turn 18 tomorrow?” I thought longingly to myself, letting out a small exhale. I dipped my fingers into the water, allowing the coolness to caress my skin, I spin my finger around making small ripples within the water. A lot of gir- I mean women in my position would be so excited about turning 18, but I find it hard to find excitement in knowing that as soon as it hits 12am that the Luna Goddess would direct me towards my lifetime mate. I sighed once more. “Perhaps I’m overthinking it” I reassured myself, “Maybe it’s not all the daunting as it seems?”, however despite the number of times I argued with himself I never seem to come around to liking the idea that, yes indeed, I’ll be finding a mate. I start to shuffle closer to the edge of the lake, something was compelling me to get in, the water was incising, it seems like it was calling my name. Without a second thought, I slipped my legs in, testing it out, ensuring that it isn’t too cold- however it seemed the water welcomed me, in fact, it seemed like it was calling me to come in even more. Without hesitation I slipped all the way in until my whole body was placed underwater, only my collarbones and head remained to be dry. I took a few steps in the lake as I stared up longing to the moon, feeling although it is calling my name, I have never felt this way before. “Wait…what time is it?” I thought quickly to myself, however, this thought was drawn short, when the smell of fresh rain filled my senses. “That’s odd,” I thought to myself, looking further up in the sky, squinting to see if there is any rainfall, but atlas the sky was clear, not a single cloud in the sky, only stars and the illumination of the moon. The smell became stronger, it became soothing, oddly relaxing, I have never smelt anything like this before. I shuffled through the water, with my nose in the air, sniffing around like the wolf I am. Like the wolf I am? Oh God, wait does that mean… I finally came to the realisation of what is going on- it must be midnight, So does that mean?... I darted my direction towards the tree line, a shadowy figure stood watching, crouching, almost hiding…Who is that? I turned myself around, but before I could even get out of the lake, the figure took off, it let me short of breath. I stood still, processing what just happened, and how quickly it happened. “Did I, Lilla, only just a few minutes of turning 18, encountered my mate?” I asked myself, as the smell of fresh rain was much harder to smell. I stared longingly out, I sighed whilst laying back in the water, allowing myself to float. I went back to staring longing at the moon allowing myself to move with the small waves “Oh Luna goddess” I spoke softly out “Please be kind to me, please?”