Finding You

Chapter Three

Sarah

When I finally grab his hand, he looks relieved and leads me down the steps without looking behind him. As we walk through the trees, I contemplate whether I should be scared or not, when he stops walking as if he found what he was looking for.

Glancing around him, I notice a tire swing. I walk closer and wonder if it’s safe.

“Why don’t you find out.”

I look at him confused but then I realize that I must’ve said that out loud.

I was reminded of the little boy who said the same thing to me when I asked about the tire swing he had in his backyard. I eventually got on with him pushing me as long as I wanted without complaining. The memory fades and I’m smiling as I trace my finger over the swing.

“So you like tire swings?”

I take my finger off the swing and look at it sadly now. “I used to.” That’s all I give him for now. He doesn’t deserve the rest.

I can feel him staring at me.

“You never know Sarah, it might be just what you need.”

I look up and he’s got a smile on his face. Neither of us say anything for a minute.

“How do you know my name?”

The silence is deafening when he doesn’t answer my question right away. I glance toward him and he looks like he wants to say something, his eyes are full of sadness but he quickly composes himself and I wonder if I was just seeing things.

“Your brother is my best friend” is all I get. As if it explains everything. I thought we might’ve had something more than that but now I’m filled with doubt.

“Okay and how do you know what I need?”

“I don’t. But sometimes swinging can make you forget everything else and make you feel like a kid again.”

He sounds sincere but I can’t help but snap at him.

“You don’t know anything about me.”

I instantly regret snapping when I see the hurt look on his face.

“Maybe not. But I did watch you go from happy to heartbroken within two seconds, all because of a tire swing.”

I let his words sink in.

Memories try to overtake but I push them back.

“I’m not sure I wanna be a kid again.” I whisper to myself as I finally sink onto the swing.

He stays quiet. I don’t think he realized how big of a wound he was opening by bringing me out here. Now he’s going to think his best friends sister is a looney.

Great.

The tire swing starts to move. I look behind me and see that he’s now pushing me. I’m grateful for the silence.

I sigh deeply, “I better go find my roommate. I left her dancing with some guy earlier and she will probably be worried.”

He stops pushing the swing and walks to the front of me, holding out his hand. I stare at it, wanting so desperately to be back in fifth grade on another tire swing. I push the thoughts away as I grab his hand and pull myself up.

I lose my footing and start to topple to the ground. I brace myself for impact, but it doesn’t come. Instead, I feel arms wrap around me and help me stand up. Once I’m standing, I immediately stiffen when he doesn’t let go of me right away. It feels too intimate but yet too right.

“Relax Sarah, I’ve got you. I won’t let you fall,” he whispers in my ear.

He pulls away from me but not before I hear, “I’m not going anywhere.”

For some reason, this makes me lean into him. It seems to comfort both of us.

Before we reach the house, he stops, “if you’re roommate isn’t ready to leave yet, then you can wait in my room if you want.”

I look at him in surprise, “You live here?”

He laughs, “Yeah, with a few other guys on the team. Including Jake.”

I almost asked him what team but he included my brother so I knew it was football.

“That must be fun” I can’t help but tease. “Thanks for the offer but all I want to do is curl up in my dorm and watch a movie.”

“You’re welcome. But just so you know, the offer stands,” he says with a smile.

I look at him and try to figure out exactly what he’s offering.

“Look, I don’t even know your name. Just because we had a few moments together, doesn’t mean that my legs are going to magically open for you, okay? I’m not that kind of girl.”

By the end of my rant, he’s trying to hold in his laughter but he’s not doing a very good job of it. He gets it under control enough to get out, “No one said anything about you opening your legs” and keeps laughing.

I groan and finish the walk to the deck. He follows behind, yelling my name in between his laughing. He’s so loud that a few people on the deck turn around to see what’s going on. I feel my face getting red.

As I head for the sliding glass door, I hear a girl’s voice, “If she’s too innocent to satisfy you then I’ll take the job.”

I hope he’s not that kind of guy, but I can only imagine him leading her to his bedroom and it makes my stomach hurt.

I reach out to open the sliding glass door and when I do, Jake comes stumbling out with his tongue down some blondes’ throat. I try to look away, but I do a double take instead.

Wait.

I know that outfit.

Oh no.

My jaw drops as Jake tears his mouth away from her and looks at me.

“Oh, hey Sarah,” he says not caring that I just saw him sticking his tongue down someone’s throat.

Rebecca turns her head toward me to see who he’s talking to. When she realizes that it’s me, she smiles. “Oh Sarah, there you are. I’ve been looking everywhere for you. I was worried.”

“I can see that” I say looking pointedly at Jake.

She smiles and then looks between Jake and I, “How do you know Jake?”

Jake looks confused, “Wait, you know my sister?”

It takes her a second for it to register but when it does, her eyes go wide with surprise and her arms fly away from him as fast as they can. And when they do, Jake’s face turns into shock. That’s one expression I have rarely seen on his face. Interesting.

That’s when I hear a faint, “the offer still stands” in my ear. I turn slightly and elbow him in the stomach which only makes him laugh.

This is extremely awkward.

I don’t want to make a big scene but honestly, I’m not sure what to do so I turn around.

“Can you give me a ride to the dorms?” I ask him.

He looks at Jake then at me, hesitating.

I don’t wait.

Shaking my head, I push through Jake and Rebecca and walk through the house., weaving my way through the crowd. I get stopped by a redheaded girl who says, “D.J. told me to tell you to wait by the front door. He went to get his keys.”

I don’t get the chance to ask her who D.J. was because she was gone as quick as she came. I decide not to stick around and hightail it out of the house and down the street as fast as I can in flip flops. It’s a few minutes before I realize that I’m not exactly sure which direction I should go. I turn back at least to try and get directions.

I get about a block away from the house when a black Ford Escape pulls up beside me. I ignore it as I speed up and inch farther away from the road without being too obvious. I hear the window roll down, I’m ready to break into a run when I hear a familiar voice that makes me relax.

“The dorms are the other way.”

I stop and turn toward the car, climbing in without saying a word.

“You ok?” He looks concerned so I nod my head.

He doesn’t move the car for a minute. “It’s your night, where to?”

I don’t hesitate, “The dorms please.”

“Are you sure?” he hesitates, “Jake and your roommate are headed that way so they can talk to you.”

I’m surprised he tells me that. I figured since he’s Jake’s friend that he wouldn’t.

I nod my head as he pulls back onto the road. “Thanks for the ride,” I say quietly.

It doesn’t take nearly as long to get back to the dorms as it did to get to the house. He parks close to the front of the building and unbuckles his seatbelt. He’s out of the car and opening my door before I can blink.

He holds out his hand, I just met him a few hours ago and I can’t believe how natural it feels to take his hand. He helps me out of the car and walks with me through the hallways and up the steps to my door.

I hesitate to open it. He puts his hand on my arm, there is the electricity. We lock eyes and I know he feels it too.

He pulls his hand away, “You don’t have to do this tonight, you know. It can wait until tomorrow. You can come back to the house and sleep in my room if you want.”

I let myself play a fantasy in my mind about being in his arms for a night. My whole body starts to get warm and I can feel my hand starting to sweat. I snap out of the fantasy.

I glance up at him and he’s smiling at me as if he knows what I was thinking. I have to remind myself that as familiar as this guy seems, he’s still a stranger.

Before I turn toward the door again, I have to know one thing.

“What’s your name?”

He laughs, “Why? Because you’ll be screaming it later?” his arm caresses my waist, shooting sparks into my groin.

I look at him wide eyed.

His laugh turns to a cough, “Sorry, it was just a joke.”

I can’t tell if he’s trying to convince me or himself by the way his face blushes.

I give him a minute as I try to get those thoughts out of my head.

I put my hand on the knob as I feel breath on my neck giving me goosebumps, “It’s D.J.”

I feel out of sorts with his mouth that close to my skin. He puts his hand on top of mine and turns the knob. I’m grateful because if he hadn’t, my dormmates would have gotten a show.

The door swings open.

Jake and Rebecca are sitting on her bed staring at me.

D.J. gives my hand a squeeze. It’s weird how it calms me down right away, as if all I need is his touch.

We slowly walk into the room. Rebecca opens her mouth to say something but I beat her to it.

“I’m not mad. It was definitely a shock at first, but I know that you both had no idea, so it’s okay. I know I handled it badly and I’m sorry. I just didn’t know how to react.”

“Is it really that bad if I hook up with your roommate?” Jake asks.

I walk closer to smack him upside the head, but Rebecca beats me to it. I laugh and move to sit on my bed, motioning for D.J. to sit too. He sits on the other side of the bed, putting too much distance between us for my liking. It’s probably for the best though since I just had a mini freak out about my brother and roommate.

“So, you’re really not mad? I’m sorry Sarah, if I would have known then I wouldn’t have.”

“It’s okay. Like I said, I overreacted,” I take a deep breath, “Growing up, I didn’t really have friends until I hit high school…”

“That’s not true Sarah, you had, what was his name?”

I shoot him a “what the f***” look and he shuts up. I knew he was bringing up Daniel and I didn’t want to think about it or have to explain about him.

“Okay, other than maybe one friend when I was ten, I didn’t have any friends until high school. But it turned out, that most of the girls that were my friends, were using me to try to get with my brothers. That’s why it bothered me so much tonight. But it doesn’t bother me as much now as it did when I saw you guys because I know neither of you knew who the other was. If you start messing around though, keep me out of it.”

The room is quiet.

“That’s awful. What bitches.”

Rebecca’s comment makes me laugh.

“Yeah.” I nod my head, “But you guys better figure out what you’re doing because you will be seeing a lot of each other whether you’re together or not. Now go have fun because all I want to do is lay here and watch a movie.”

“Sounds good to me” Rebecca agrees.

I smile then turn my face serious, “I have to ask you a serious question, so serious that it could make or break this friendship”.

Taking a deep breath, “Do you like True Blood?”

She keeps her face straight as she contemplates her answer.

“I do actually.”

I breathe a big sigh of relief and get laughed at.

“Good because that’s what we are going to be watching” I say as if it’s already decided and she doesn’t seem to mind.

“Wait a second,” Jake holds his hands up as he protests, “Are guys allowed in this movie night?”

I look towards Rebecca and her eyes swing my way as she shrugs her shoulders at me. I start to shake my head at Jake as I say “Okay.”

He lets out a sigh, “You’re so mean”. I laugh as he tackles me onto the bed. I shove him off and sit up. He grabs the bean bag chairs that I brought from home and sets them in front of the T.V. The chairs are more like mini couches because of how long they are and they can fit two people comfortably. I’ve had them for years and have always loved them.

I look up to D.J., who has been quiet this whole time.

“D.J., you’re more than welcome to stay but if you want to go back to the party, that’s okay too.”

His eyes never leave my face as he says the sweetest words I’ve ever heard.

“I’ll stay.”

I can’t hide the smile that crosses my face and he returns it.

I head to the bathroom to change into sleep shorts and a t-shirt. Taking a little longer to brush my teeth and wash my face. There is a knock on the door so I open it. D.J. is standing there. “I umm… just wanted to check and see if you were okay.”

“Yeah, sorry about your party.”

He just shrugs, “There is always parties, I’d rather be here.”

It takes a minute for me to catch my breath, “Ready?” I say to cover up the awkwardness but it seems to make it even more awkward.

He nods so I grab his arm, dragging him with me to the empty bean bag as Jake hits the “play” button.

We get through a couple episodes before I start to get cold. D.J. grabs the throw blanket off of my bed and covers me with it. I scoot closer to him to give him some of the blanket. Surprisingly, he covers up with it.

It didn’t take long for my head to find his arm. I wasn’t sure how he felt about it but in my sleepy state, I didn’t care. I was too comfortable.

Eventually, his other arm found my waist, pulling his body closer to mine. I was half asleep by now but it made me smile. I snuggled more into him and fell completely asleep.

*Next Day*

The boys must have put me in my bed last night because that’s where I woke up this morning. But the part that I’m not sure about is where I heard someone whisper, “I’m sorry Sarah but I’m so glad that I found you”. Must have been a dream but it seemed so real.

Rebecca is nowhere to be found. She must have went back to Jake’s last night. I shoot her text and hop in the shower.

I rinse my body and turn off the water. Wrapping a towel around me, I start singing and walk out of the bathroom to get my clothes. Not paying attention to where I’m going, I run into a mountain, “Oof”.

Before I can see who I ran into, I feel it.

It’s the electricity.

But this time, it goes through my whole body.

I inhale deep, trying to shake the feeling but my nostrils fill with a musky scent that makes my n*****s harden. I put my face right into his chest and moan as I inhale.

I hear a small intake of breath right above me. I slowly raise my head to look at D.J. but before I reach his face, I hear laughter coming from the other side of the room which breaks me out of my daze. My cheeks flood with heat. I can’t believe I just sniffed him and moaned on him like I was a dog in heat.

I peak around D.J. to see Jake and Rebecca sitting up on her bed laughing at me. There is nothing like having your brother witness you getting all hot and bothered over his best friend.

Uugghhh. How embarrassing.

I’m so mortified that I can’t look D.J. in the eye right away.

I step away from him and grab my clothes while I all but full on sprint back to the bathroom. I’m about to click the door shut when I glance at D.J. from the corner of my eye. I’m taken aback by the look on his face. He’s staring at me with hooded eyes and his breathing is shallow.

I shut the door the rest of the way and turn the lock into place. I brace myself against the counter and take deep breaths trying to slow down my heart.

I take my time getting dressed, putting a little makeup on and rearranging the bathroom.

When I have nothing left to rearrange, I sigh. Time to face the music.

When I finally walk out of the bathroom, I’m relieved when the only person I see is Rebecca.

“It’s about time you came out of hiding”.

Her back is to me, but I can hear the smile in her voice.

When I stay silent she turns to me, “You have to admit, that was a little funny.”

“Okay, so it was a little funny but that doesn’t make it any less embarrassing.” Just thinking about it makes my face warm.

She pegs me with a look, “So, what’s he smell like?”

I hit my head with my palm as she breaks into a big smile that makes her look like the Cheshire cat from Alice in Wonderland.

“Don’t worry, he looked like he was into it.”

I glare at her.

She laughs. “No seriously, he looked like he was about to take you up against the wall and all he had to do was rip the towel off. It was kinda hot.”

“Well, he’s gonna have to find someone else to push up against the wall because it’s not gonna be me.”

“You can pretend all you want Sarah but I see you. I see the way you look at him.”

I shrug her off, “Yeah, whatever.”

I want to tell her the truth.

The truth is, it’s as if my heart recognizes him, maybe even my soul. That when he touches me or even just looks at me, my body ignites.

But I keep silent.

Because I never knew it was possible to feel like this.

So, I hold it in.

While secretly hoping that my body won’t just ignite, it will turn into a blazing inferno