Finding You

Chapter Eight

Sarah

As soon as Rebecca walked through the door, she wanted details about my night with D.J. So I gave her some, just not all of them.

Rebecca’s phone goes off a while later. She texts quickly back to someone.

I’m surprised when she randomly says, “Let’s go shopping.”

My face scrunches up as my eyes flick from her phone to her face.

“It’s just Jake,” she says defensively.

I raise my eyebrows, “And he’s telling you to take me shopping?”

“No.”

I can tell something is up because she’s fidgeting. She never fidgets.

“I think we should have a girls day and I want to go shopping.”

“Bec, you have got to have money to shop. I hate to break it to you but I don’t have any.”

She shrugs her shoulders, “We will just window shop then. I just want to get out of these dorms for a little bit.”

It would be nice to get out of here for a while, but I would rather do something else. I’m not a girly girl and she’s testing that. I’m about to say no when she turns her sad eyes at me.

“Fine. We can go.”

She fist pumps, “Yes, you won’t regret it.”

“Uh huh.”

She discreetly grabs her phone and shoots off a text, I look at her suspiciously but she doesn’t bat an eyelash.

That’s how I ended up at a mall about an hour later.

We’ve been here about twenty minutes and she’s already throwing a bunch of clothes that I can’t afford over my dressing room door.

So much for window shopping.

Half the time she is begging to see how something looks and the other half she’s nowhere to be found.

I’m surprised when she throws most of the clothes on the counter next to the register.

I swear the sales lady that’s ringing us up has dollar signs in her eyes.

“Umm Bec, what are you doing?”

She turns to me confused, “You like all these right? And they fit?”

“Well yeah but..”

“Then what’s the problem?” she asks.

“How about the fact that I don’t have the money for all of this?” I gesture to the clothes, “And if I did, I wouldn’t spend it on clothes.”

My eyeballs almost pop out when I see her pull out a black Platinum credit card.

“Okay, then pretend they’re my clothes and you’re allowed to wear any of them whenever you want.”

She smiles as she waves the credit card in my face. I go to protest but she’s not paying any attention to me, she’s staring at something behind me.

I turn to see what she’s staring at when something catches my eye on the far back wall. It’s a deep purple, open back, strappy dress that hits just above the knee. It’s beautiful.

I asked the sales lady if she could get it down.

“It’s really pretty, you should try it on.” Rebecca’s eyes sparkle as she looks from me to the dress.

Not thinking twice about it, I let her lead me to the dressing room.

I knew the dress was a perfect fit even before I looked in the mirror. I slowly turn towards it, I’m surprised to see Rebecca behind me. I didn’t hear her come in.

“Wow.” Her jaw is hanging open, “it’s as if it was made for you.”

I swear she’s a mind reader because that’s exactly what I was thinking.

“It’s beautiful.”

Rebecca steps out of the dressing room as she yells, “We will take the dress too.”

From the front, the dress showed off my shoulders, waist and legs. The color was perfect with my skin and hair color. But no matter how much I love it, I still can’t buy it.

“Bec, I have nowhere to wear it. Why would I buy a beautiful, most likely expensive dress, when it’s going to sit in my closet.”

She looks at me as if I’m crazy.

“Sarah, it’s perfect for you. You can’t just not buy it because you don’t have anywhere to wear it too.”

“I can’t?”

“No. You buy the dress anyway and wear it whenever you please. I don’t care if you make up your own holiday. You’re getting that dress.”

She looks so serious that I can’t help but laugh.

Not looking amused, she pulls me out of the dressing room and into the middle of the store where they have mirrors from all different angles.

“D.J.’s already smitten with you, but I bet you will knock his socks off in that dress.”

I blush just thinking about him.

“See, even that guy can’t take his eyes off of you and he has a girl attached to him,” she points behind me.

I turn to see who she’s talking about.

Mike is staring right at me through the store window. He’s got his arm around some blonde who can’t seem to take her mouth off his neck. I instantly feel n***d with the way he’s looking at me.

Rebecca grabs my arm, pulling me towards the dressing room but not before I get another glance at Mike.

Rebecca ends up buying all the clothes, including the dress. Must be nice to have rich parents.

I’m relieved that Mike is nowhere to be seen when we leave the store and we go get dinner.

After dinner, we bring all the clothes up to our dorm. My arms are so full that I don’t see the vase full of Daisies on my desk right away. Rebecca spies them first and reads the card.

“My sexy Sarah, I can’t wait to unwrap you out of your dress and ravage your body.”

She laughs as I throw a pillow at her and grab the note out of her hands.

“You’re impossible,” I laugh at her and read the note.

“S, These made me think of you. Simple yet beautiful. Let me know when you get back. -D”

He’s right, the flowers are beautiful, also one of my favorites.

I’m smiling like a fool and I know it, but I can’t help that he makes my heart happy.

“Girl, you are far too gone.”

I ignore Bec as I take my phone out and send D.J. a text.

Sarah: The flowers are beautiful!

D.J.: Beautiful flowers for a beautiful girl.

Sarah: That was really cheesy... but sweet.

D.J.: I like cheese.

D.J.: We are having a party Friday since there is no game this weekend. U girls wanna come?

Sarah: we’re in.

I don’t bother to ask Bec because I already know that wherever Jake is, she will be.

Sarah: heading to bed. Night.

D.J.: Sweet dreams.

I plug my phone in and I’m asleep within minutes.

***

The week came and went, it was already Friday. I’m trying to finish a mountain of homework when Bec bursts through the door, urging me to get in the shower already.

We get to the party about nine thirty and surprisingly, it was in full swing.

I was a bit hesitant about the outfit that Bec picked out for me, but she wouldn’t take no for an answer. It’s a black halter top dress that has VERY little material that it barely covers the essential parts. I honestly have no idea how she talked me into wearing it. We’ve only been here for about twenty minutes and I’ve already had three guys offer for me to go home with them.

D.J. and Jake are nowhere to be found so I shoot a text telling them that we are here as we head to the kitchen to get drinks.

I’ve just downed my second Jack and Coke when Bec grabs my hand leading me out to the dance floor in the living room.

There was a D.J. set up in a corner of the room and sweaty bodies everywhere. If I were sober, I wouldn’t set foot in there but since I’m feeling pretty good right now, I go willingly.

I start swinging my hips to what turns out to be the beginning of 50 Cent’s “Candy shop”. I haven’t heard this song in a while and I’m surprised that I remember the words.

I start singing to Rebecca when I feel hands on my hips pulling me backward a few inches so our bodies touch.

I mimic some of the moves that I’ve seen in music videos and apparently, I don’t do too bad because of the bulge that’s now in my backside.

Hands slide up my ribcage slowly underneath the fabric of my dress. I hesitate, my breathing gets shallow as the hands keep moving. I know exactly where they are headed, making my n*****s harden in anticipation. Lips kiss my neck as a voice roughly whispers, “See how I make you feel? I knew you wanted me. The body doesn’t lie.”

I freeze.

I know that voice and it wasn’t D.J.

I turn to face Mike but he’s being thrown to the ground by a pissed off looking D.J. Rebecca comes to my side and grabs my hand.

Where the heck was she the whole time I was being felt up?

D.J. is pinning Mike to the floor and says something that I can’t make out to Jake.

Jake looks at me and walks over, telling Rebecca to take me to his room and that they will come for us when things are handled. she nods her head once and starts pulling me through the crowd without a backward glance.

She sits on Jake’s bed as I shut the door. Thankful that Jake’s has a bathroom attached to his bedroom, I wash my hands and splash water on my face. Grabbing a towel to dry off, I look up and see Rebecca in the doorway.

“Wanna talk about it?”

I know that answering that question was pointless because no matter what my answer is, she won’t let it go.

I sigh loudly, cringing when I hear yelling and things being knocked over.

A minute goes by before she turns back to me and whispers, “What were you thinking girl?”

“I was and I wasn’t.”

She scrunches up her brow and I continue, “At first it was okay, we were just dancing.”

“Then?” she prompts.

“I don’t know. I guess I was feeling good from the alcohol so I let a little looser than I should have.”

“Is that what the Shakira a*s shaking thing was for?” she laughs at me.

My face heats up, I can only imagine how my drunken Shakira moves looked. My head goes into my hands and I groan.

“It gets worse.”

She stops laughing, “What?”

“I got felt up. His hands went under my dress and were headed straight for...”

“Oh my god.”

“Yeah. Then he kissed my neck and told me that he knew I wanted him. The next thing I know, D.J.’s got him pinned to the ground.”

Her mouth hangs open.

“Bec, the worst part is that I was actually getting turned on during the whole thing.”

“You were?” She sounds as surprised as I feel.

“Ugghh, as much as I want to say no, I can’t. It felt good to have him on my body but honestly, I thought it was D.J.”

There is a sharp intake of breath.

I turn to see D.J. and Jake in the doorway. Jake looks uncomfortable and D.J.’s shock quickly turns into anger. Without sparing me a glance, he turns and walks out slamming the door behind him.

Jake rubs his forehead, “You really did it this time Sarah.”

“Excuse me?” I walk to him until I’m right in front of him. “What do you mean?”

“Just forget it. Let’s get some sleep.”

Rebecca and I exchange glances then look back at Jake.

“All Mike does is t*****e D.J. by saying things about you. He usually just lets it go but tonight, when he walked in and saw Mike all over you, he lost it. I’m surprised he had enough control to get you out of the room before he swung at him. But then you say that you wanted him to touch you” he sighs, “That’s messed up Sarah and you know it.”

He looks as if he’s disgusted with me and I roll my eyes at him.

“Did you even hear the end of that conversation while you were eavesdropping? The part where I said that I thought it was D.J.?”

He shakes his head as I go for the door.

“Where are you going?”

I turn my head, “To find him. Where else would I go?”

“I can only imagine how pissed he is. Just give him some space to cool down.”

“You’re probably right. But I’m not sleeping in the same room as the two of you.” I cross my arms while eyeing the sheets.

“Ha ha. I will go sleep in D.J.’s room so you girls can have my bed.”

Jake walks to his drawers and throws clothes at Rebecca and I.

“I can practically see your head spinning. Spit it out Sarah,” Jake raises his eyebrows at me as I stick my tongue out at him.

“Do you think that D.J. would mind if I slept in his room?”

He groans as he walks to his bed.

“As my sister, I will break his hands if I hear about him touching you. But as my best friend’s girl, that might not be a bad idea.”

I shower quickly in Jake’s bathroom then he walks me to D.J.’s room, which is right next to his.

“Call one of our cell’s if you need anything okay?”

I nod my head before I shut and lock the door. I’m grateful that no one will be bothering me.

I hesitate for a second before climbing onto his bed. I send him a text before placing my phone on his nightstand.

Sarah: Sorry for tonight. It wasn’t what you think. Please be careful. I love you.

I hesitate before typing those last few words. I don’t want for the first time that I told a boy that I loved him to be in a text or when we are fighting. But I have a bad feeling that I can’t shake, and I want him to know.

I never told Daniel what he meant to me and that’s something that I have to live with. I don’t want that to happen with D.J. I hit the send button before I had the chance to delete it.

I wait half an hour before I give up on getting a response and try to go to sleep.

***

When I wake up, it takes me a minute to remember where I am and what happened last night. Then it dawns on me.

D.J. never came back last night or if he did then he didn’t want to be around me.

I immediately check my phone.

My heart sinks when I don’t have any missed calls or texts.

I run my fingers through my hair and unlock the bedroom door. I head to Jake’s room to see if he heard anything from D.J. Jake and Rebecca are still sleeping so I walk to the kitchen for a drink and some Tylenol.

There is a half-n***d couple on the couch, I avert my eyes as much as possible when I walk by.

I scour the fridge for Orange Juice, I know they have some because Jake loves it as much as I do.

“Score!” I finally find it behind all the beer cans. I’ve been through most of the cabinets looking for a glass when two appear in front of me from someone behind me.

Thinking it’s D.J., I quickly spin around but when I see who it is, my jaw drops slightly. My eyes are immediately drawn to his black eye and I gasp.

“Oh my gosh. Are you ok?”

Mike’s got a slight smile on his face. I knew that I shouldn’t be talking to him, but I feel bad. I was part of it too.

He shrugs it off, “It looks worse than it is. Mind pouring me a glass too?”

I had temporarily forgotten about the Orange Juice until he mentioned it. I get busy filling the two glasses and hand him one.

His is gone within a few gulps while I take my time with mine and study him.

Without looking up at me he says, “I can feel you checking me out.”

I choke on my drink then clear my throat. “I was trying to figure out your next move.”

He raises an eyebrow at me, “My next move?”

He pours himself another glass and gulps it down.

“Every time I’ve been around you, trouble always follows. I was just wondering what is gonna happen this time.”

His face is a mask, not showing anything. “This morning, I come in peace,” he raises his hands in the air. “I’m too tired to do anything.”

“If all you want is one night stands instead of an actual relationship. Keep doing what you’re doing but that’s one major thing that turned me away from you. You’re a pig.”

He laughs to himself, “You didn’t seem to think I was a pig last night.”

My cheeks start to get warm.

“I’m not exactly sure what I was feeling last night. I’ll admit, it felt good.” He’s got a s**t eating grin on his face until I continue, “But I also thought you were D.J.”

His smile falters.

“Let me get this straight, it’s not ok for you to be turned on by someone else but it is ok for your boyfriend to punch me out then get drunk, play strip poker and pass out half n***d with another girl on the couch? All while his naïve girlfriend is waiting in his bed all night?”

I let his rant sink in for a minute then it clicks. I slowly walk into the living room and look at the couch.

There it was, right before my eyes.

D.J. half-n***d with his arm around a familiar red head, who is laying in her leopard print b*a and panties.

My mouth drops and those three words I sent in my text come to mind.

I’m so stupid.

Just because he’s the first guy that’s been able to help me forget about Daniel and was able to make me feel the way I did, doesn’t mean that I love him. But if that’s true, why does it feel like my heart just shattered?

I’m still staring when I hear mike beside me. “I’m sorry. I thought you saw them. I thought you knew,” he says softly.

I shake my head slightly.

“Well, I didn’t. Happy now? I got hurt too.” I try to blink back the tears but some slip through.

“No, I’m not.” He grabs my hand and pulls me back to the kitchen.

“I need to get my things and get out of here.” I’m trying to stay calm, but I can feel that I’m on the verge of a breakdown.

I’m startled when he reaches up wiping away a few of my tears, his face is full of remorse. “I can take you somewhere if you want to leave.”

I don’t understand why he’s being so nice right now. Maybe underneath the hardass exterior, he’s not as bad as he seems.

I look up and he looks like he’s about to kiss me.

“Okay, thanks. Give me a minute to grab my things.”

I walk out of the kitchen through the living room, averting my eyes again and head down the hall to D.J.’s room. I grab my phone as quick as I can and see if Jake’s awake yet.

I bang on the door until a sleepy Rebecca opens the door. I practically shout at her that D.J.’s on the couch with another girl and that I’m leaving. I’m pretty sure that she can half understand me through my tears.

I leave her their trying to decipher what I just said and jog to find Mike talking to Chase in the kitchen.

I wipe my eyes and they both look at me. They both have looks on their faces that I don’t feel like decoding right now.

“I’m ready to go.”

Mike nods and holds his finger up telling me to hold on as he walks into the hall and walks back with a tissue box. I laugh to myself as I take them.

“Thanks.”

I give the couch one last look. They’re both sound asleep.

I close my eyes and breathe deep. Opening them, I look toward Chase, “I’ll see you in class,” and give him a small wave. He looks as if he wants to say something but nods his head instead.

As Mike opens the front door, my phone goes off. It’s a text from Jake. Rebecca must have woken him up.

Jake: Bec said you left and crying?

Sarah: Go check your couch. You’ll know.

I hit send and pull Mike out the door. He goes to start his car as I peer through one of the front windows that has a direct view to the living room.

I watch as Rebecca and Jake walk into the room. Bec notices D.J. first and her jaw drops.

She’s hitting Jake’s arm trying to get his attention but he’s talking to Chase. I see Chase pointedly look at the couch and Jake turns.

His face turns red.

“WHAT THE f**k?” is the last thing I hear before I turn towards the waiting Mustang.