Twice the charm

7. For June's sake

LUCY

  "What did I do wrong?" I asked myself in the echoing silence. "All I did was to keep her safe."

"I know." Mother came to my shoulder to offer support. I melted like hot butter in her warm hands. "But June is tired of hearing it. I think she is starting to suspect there is something else at play Lucy."

"But he will hurt her." I maintained.

"Sometimes Lucy, people change. I know what Grant has done to you is unforgivable but don't you think he's a much better person now? He's grown and so have you? Maybe that man who was so afraid of being a father isn't anymore."

I wanted to believe my mother's words but it was a difficult pill to swallow. Not because I was afraid of letting the father know he had a daughter but the aftermath of what would happen after the discovery. The Claytons, They were monsters in powerful places. I had had my life ripped away from me at a young age by their heir, I wasn't about to let June be the Clayton she was bound to be if they demanded custody. I did not want a court case. I did not want to share June either. I wanted none of it. But then June, Just like mother had awfully predicted was growing up and it would not be long before she knocked on Grant's door and spilled everything. What would happen then? I knew only one thing would satisfy my daughter. Meeting her father or better, being assured that her father knew of her existence even if that could break her more than she already was at the moment.

"I will try mother," I said.

Mom held my hands and made me look into her face. Wrinkles and worries were written all over her. "Do more than try Lucy. Let Grant meet his daughter and if he doesn't want to. Then June will have to live with her wish but you cannot keep protecting her anymore."

"You are right..." I trailed off, getting off the couch and trudging to the guest room where I had intended to spend the night.

Once inside, I tried to bury the gloomy thoughts. But it was futile. I could not even sleep. Not with the thoughts weighing my neck. June's hurtful words kept playing in my head on repeat. How could I have been blind to her pleas for help? Who was I even kidding? I knew very well what ran through June's mind but I kept convincing myself she would grow out of it. It was selfish and even I knew it. Perhaps it was something more. June might be a teenager but in reality, She still had the mind of a child. She lived in some fantasy believing she could bring me and Grant back together. If only she knew the only reason Grant put the ring in my finger was because I was carrying her. Not because he loved me. Grant had found it easy to reject me. A rejection I still fought within dark times. When Grant does it again, It would break June. I could not let it happen.

But she will hate the bastard once it happens. Why prevent it? A little voice spoke to me. It was right. My dark optimism was painfully correct. I would let it happen.  Just as the peace began to settle in my body. I got a text from Chuck. It said something about Grant postponing the survey. My eyes had to be playing tricks on me. I drew my phone closer and read through the lines again. It was basically a note of Grant apologizing to the company for postponing the appointment and wasting everyone's time. Of course, that did not happen. So why was Grant trying to protect me? The second chain also stated the appointment had been shifted to the next day and I was still the one handling it. I guess it was set in stone. I had to tell Grant about June.

***

  You can do this. That was the sorry tale I told myself as I walked into the Clayton family bank. The scent of the bank itself brought old memories. Everything related to him always brought it back but this time, It was a little different. This time it was not about me. It was about June. The poor girl had snuck me a letter late at night apologizing for how rude she had been. I could not blame her. It was an impulse. As volatile as she could be, I knew what transpired last night was nothing but a spur. A talent she inherited from me. She was the reason I had woken as early as six to meet him despite my fears of what was to come. In the deepest of my heart, I wondered if there was even the tiniest possibility that a man as selfish as Grant could give his vulnerable teenage daughter what she wanted to hear not to speak of the love she so deserved. He was barely husband material and someone who hardly wanted to become a father and sadly June was about to learn all the enigma surrounding her birth. It hurt because it ruined everything I had protected June from since her birth: The risk of facing the same rejection I had to endure from an unscrupulous man. My thoughts went on a pause as I stepped out of the elevator that had led me on to the top floor. My thoughts went from a pause to a total reset when my eyes caught the splendor of the top floor of the bank. And people thought our office was fancy. The decor could only be tagged one word, Elegant. The monument of black giant tiles that covered the walls of the bank which duly blended with the white lights to create a smoky effect was a beau to look at. As my eyes darted left and right, my sight caught the view of two women. The younger one smiled and moved towards my direction.

"Hello I am Mr. Clayton's secretary, How can we help you?"

"I'm looking for Grant Clayton. I have an appointment." I replied with a professional glee.

"Oh well, Come this way please."

The secretary scrolled through the computer as she searched for my name. It finally popped up and her strained demeanor bore a smile almost immediately.

"His office is on the left." She finally said with a smile but I did not need directions. This was not my first time here. Not that I was glad to be walking through his doors again but I had a purpose and it was not even for the survey I was reappointed to have with him. My heart did flips at the floor of my chest as I shaking my walked into Grant's office, a beautiful mix of a huge room, a desk, scattered files, and an incredibly tormenting image of the man she wanted to forget.

"I was not expecting you this early." He revealed.

My head felt light and my legs wobbled as I struggled to swim forward. Utter paranoia had me in its claws. How was I going to start, It would a hell of a bomb if I just threw it all down. I needed to start somewhere but the more I tried to open my lips to say something reasonable. Nothing but a rush of air left me.

"Okay, What is the awful thing you want to tell me now?"He launched at me earning a questioning brow. How could he tell? Even before I found the courage to drop the question ripping at my heart, he answered. " You look petrified." And as soon as the words left his lips, I felt my strength come back. Never have I wanted him to be able to read me. Not after everything that had happened.

"Yes, " I coughed. "You did not have to lie yesterday. I did not need your help. Neither did I need another of a Clayton's well-meaning favors."

"Now stop it right there." He objected, springing from his chair and looking like a jumping jelly bean. "I do not appreciate your sarcasm and if you must know, I did it for me. Not you."

"I do not care. I only came here to give you this."  I breathed in deep and long to avoid joining him in another childish fight. That wasn't what I was here for. I reached into my handbag and found just what might be enough to shut him up. June's birth certificate. Just I wanted to extract it, I faltered. My hands instead went for the cheque. My stomach knotted in and out as I gripped the paper and slid it by his table.

"That is your cheque. Mr. Clayton, June, and I don't need it."

His features went tense. His lips made a grim line before the words left his mouth. "Who is June?"