Dead No More

PROLOGUE Oh Gerdad, how I wish things had been different, but the desire for the truth burned a hole in my soul and you knew that. You said revenge could only hurt me, and in a way you were right, even more so if you are reading this letter, because it means I am likely dead. I needed answers, I needed to be at rest, one way or the other, and so I’m sorry for this additional hurt. You have been my world since that awful day, and I know you still grieve for Mum, Dad and Nan. I have given my life my all, but it could never be enough, and bless you, because you saw this. Why did you never say? You knew, you saw; the brain damage was not severe, and concealing this knowledge likely prolonged my life, at least long enough to make sense of what was left of my world, and I believe I now have. People laughed at us, especially at me, and at first this was so upsetting and cruel; you showed me they were just shallow. “Muddle-headed” you would say, and that always made me laugh as I pictured their heads full of tangled string, like a Mr Man cartoon. I knew the risks, though I had hoped for a better outcome, and I am grateful to Sam, please don’t blame him. You always believed in me, a girl with half her head done in, but what was left worked okay, if a little awkward. I have been able to fathom some of the mystery, but for the real answers you must look into your heart; please look, Gerdad, my dearest wish is you will find peace yourself, as I believe I now have. I love you so much Juliet X Kerr Nakka would look and, in the process, he would unpack his suitcase of hurt. But would he have the strength and, more importantly, the ability? He never was the sharpest knife in the drawer, but he will look, even if it is the last thing he does, and it just may be. PART I OPERATION RHUBARB “I believe that banking institutions are more dangerous to our liberties than standing armies.” THOMAS JEFFERSON