Ruined Lullaby

Aura’s POV I’ve always been a screw up. Not saying it to make anyone feel bad about me or pity me, it’s just hard fact. My earliest memories are being chastised and scolded for my most recent errors and mess-ups. I’ve learned to live with it, as at this point nothing is going to change. My name is Aura. I don’t technically have a last name as my so-called mother dumped me off at the territory border when I was an infant. My last name is simply the name of the pack, the White Moon pack. Our current alpha, Alpha Damien, isn’t a terrible man. He’s fair, his Luna is a bit of a scatterbrain and their children are certainly entitled and spoiled, but they’re not bullies, so I can’t complain too much. From what I was told, my father was a Warrior who died in battle when two warring packs were surprised by rogues and enemies had to become allies quickly. Not quickly enough to save his life unfortunately. As an orphan, my rank was immediately determined to be the lowest of the pack, an omega. I don’t mind being an omega most of the time, although there are times (usually early in the mornings) when I really wouldn’t mind NOT having to get up at the crack of O dark stupid to begin to prepare for the day, but I don’t have to worry about being abused too much as there is zero tolerance at White Moon for anyone who would dare abuse an Omega. Alpha Damien has been pushing for change with other packs that treat Omegas like slaves or feel it is their right to beat them and he figures this is because the other packs and Alphas haven’t realized a basic truth, which is that without the Omegas, a pack would fail. You can’t just load up a pack with high-ranking wolves and then not have your worker bees to ensure things run smoothly. Once Alpha Damien made that realization he immediately set about trying to create change. Just because we aren’t the best at fighting or other high physical activities doesn’t mean we’re useless. Call our Head Omega weak and she’ll beat you to death with her rolling pin I swear. I have watched this tiny rail thin stick of a woman lift up a 50 lb bag of flour and carry it across the pack house on her shoulder and not break a sweat or breathe heavy. It's nice to get some respect for who we are. At least here in White Moon. Sorry, I got distracted. Anyway, I am nearing my 20th birthday, when I will finally be old enough to find my mate. I got my wolf at 16 and she and I have been a very happy and unstoppable team. My wolf, Usagi claims we are much stronger than Omega, but I don’t see how. She insists, the annoying pup and I’ve stopped arguing with her. It causes me too much of a headache. Now that we are reaching what is considered “adulthood” in the werewolf world, it is time to begin a career, to find a mate, to start a new life. Maybe one where I am not the lowest of the low. It would be a dream to meet my mate, but I’m not expecting him to accept me. Most Omega’s get rejected if their mate is a higher rank and not even the changes brought about by Alpha Damien can change that yet. The mentality is still very old-fashioned. I graduated high school in the top ¼ of my class and have dithered about going to community college or University. I’m not sure because I just don’t know what I want to do. I don’t care enough about anything. Truly, I excel at not giving a sh*t. Sounds depressing, but it is what it is. I’m numb. I don’t know why. I want to feel. I want to love. I want to do more than exist and survive from day to day. Surely there is more to life than this? “Aura, get down to the kitchen. It’s bread baking day and we’re already behind!” my friend Moni called up to me. I shake myself out of my pensive thoughts and look at the time, my eyes widening. “Crap! I lost track of time! Coming Moni!” She’s standing in the hallway, a smirk on her face. “Waxing philosophical again were we?” I shrug. “You have any better ideas to do when we’re not working?” my penchant for losing myself in my head is well known. It was a great cause of teasing when I was still in high school. Moni let out a chuckle. “I have many of them, and most involve copious amounts of nudity and alcohol.” “Not my jam Moni. You know that.” “You have got to be the biggest prude of a werewolf that I have ever met.” She sighed. “Maybe once you pass your 20th birthday you’ll unwind a little bit. Maybe you’ll meet your Mate and unwind even more.” She grinned suggestively at me. “More like I’ll meet my mate, get rejected and then be back in the kitchens.” I said grimly. “Did you have Carnation Instant b***h for breakfast?” she questioned. “I swear if I wasn’t your friend I would have walked away already. “Am I that bad?” “Have you had any coffee?” Moni countered. “Not a drop.” I replied. “No wonder you’re such a crank.” She grabbed me by my shoulder. “Come on, you can make bread and have coffee at the same time. Next time warn me that I’m taking my life into my own hands when you are caffeine deficient.” “How would that be fun for me?” I laughed “Brat.” She elbowed me and led the way to the kitchens, where there was glorious, delicious coffee. I enter the kitchen and take a deep breath as the welcoming scent of yeast greets me. I go around to start pre-heating ovens, pour myself some coffee and prepare for the day. “Where is the bloody coffee??” a voice screeched very loudly, causing everyone within earshot to wince. “It’s five thirty in the bloody morning.” Another Omega muttered. “What is she doing down here at this hour?” Remember those entitled and spoiled Alpha children I mentioned? That is the melodious voice of Alpha’s oldest daughter, Erika slamming open doors and stomping into the kitchen. Erika is 24, unmated and has all the charm of a oozing boil. “Apologies mistress.” Said another Omega. “We are just getting set up for the day and hadn’t yet brought out coffee for the pack yet. Training doesn’t start for another 30 minutes and coffee is always prepared with breakfast by the time everyone returns.” “Save your excuses. If you’re going to be lazy. I see you had enough time to make some for yourselves, you greedy little parasites.” Erika sneered. “Please, allow us to pour you a cup.” Moni said hastily, before she could start ranting and throwing items. Like I said, many still have old-fashioned views on how to treat Omegas. Erika is no exception. She is a darling around her father, but when she’s on her own she is an absolute b*tch. I note she is in last night’s clothing so she either struck out or did the walk of shame home. My thought is the former given that if she had just gotten laid she’d be in a much better mood. Unless her partner had no idea what they were doing and it was s****l frustration. Either way, I let the others deal with her while I started measuring out flour, I have neither the time nor the brain cells to deal with the Alpha brats this morning. My movement catches Erika’s eyes, which light up when they see me. ‘Crap.’ I think to myself. She gets a malicious smile on her face as she moves towards me. “So I understand someone is almost all grown up. The big 2-0.” I nod and keep my eyes on my mixing bowl as I add honey and yeast to start creating a dough. “I hope you’re not expecting your mate to show up anytime soon.” Erika continued. “I don’t really care either way.” I answer neutrally. I just want her to leave so I can get on with my day. Erika snorted. “Right. Says every Omega ever. Because you know the truth, that no one other than your own kind will ever want you. My father says Omegas have use, I disagree. You serve us for protecting you and keeping you alive. Truthfully, none of the ranked members care in the slightest for any of you.” “I know.” I reply shortly. Erika starts to walk across the kitchen to me, only to be cut off by the Head Omega. “Miss Erika, we are trying to not fall further behind so we can properly serve our ranked members and show how much we respect all of you. Please could we get back to work so there are no further grievances?” Erika stops and stares at her with the same expression someone would use if they walked through dog crap. She realizes that she isn’t going to get anywhere today with trying to get any of us riled up. Erika glares at all of us, takes her coffee cup and stomps out of the kitchen. “Thanks Ruth.” She grunts in acknowledgement and goes back to her own dough. I’m not very close with any of the Omegas here, I keep my distance and it shows. Other than Moni I don’t talk to many people, am never asked to go out or spend time with my peer group and don’t really care to. Isn’t my life fun?