The Swearing Contract

**WARNING; language is used frequently, if it's not your thing I completely understand. You can choose to skip over it, or ignore it completely. Just know that the cussing is what the story's about;) 11:30  I slam the door to my car, making sure the rusted piece of trash actually shut, before muttering a curse. "Piece of s**t, I can't believe I bought you!" I ended up screaming not-too-subtly at the end, before I realize my skirt is caught in the door I just shut, "damn it, it's gonna be one of 'those' days isn't it?" This is bullshit! I already told Toby I would meet him at eleven, and I'm already thirty minutes late. I see eyes wandering over to me, but I just ignore them.  Yeah, because I actually give a flying f**k about what people think of me. Sadly I suppose everyone judges in some form or another. It’s human, but it’s annoying. After getting my skirt unstuck, I throw my jacket over my sleeveless shoulders for some warmth, it's still chilly even though it officially became spring three weeks ago. In New York, you're lucky if you don't see snow in summer. Ok, that was an exaggeration.  Inside the small café, I scan the booths looking for the familiar red head of hair that belonged to Toby. When I finally find him, I sprint to his table. "Hey, sorry I'm late. My f*****g car keeps messing up." I take a biscuit from the center of the table before shoving it in my mouth.  I know I have bad manners, but I still continue my angry rant through eating, "this asshole slammed on his breaks in the middle of the damn road, all for a f*****g raccoon! Who needs them so-"  "Molly," Toby interrupted me quietly before I could continue on with my insulting sentence. I was still trying to down the biscuit that was soggy in my mouth, "you really need to stop swearing Molly." I rolled my eyes at him, I'm a woman who can do whatever the hell I want to do. There is no stopping me, and he knows this.  Toby didn't like when I cursed, he was strongly against it-and he didn't bother letting me know it. He always says it puts a lady down more than anything. Sexist bastard. I can do anything he can do, with perfect candor. "Psh. I'll stop swearing the day someone offers me a million dollars." I was keenly aware of a man sitting not too far away from us. I honestly don't know what it was about him that made me notice him, but sure enough, I did.  I barely even notice him get up from the table. "It really isn't that hard Molly." He was trying to prove a useless point. A point that will never be made. I knew the man had been listening to our conversation from where he sat, I just didn't know he was paying attention to what was being said.  I noticed him wipe his mouth with a napkin before he disappeared from my peripheral vision. "Like I said Toby, a million bucks-cough it up."  "I'll take you up on that offer." A deep velvety voice resonated from the table beside us. To say both Toby and I was shocked would be an understatement. I all but jump out of my skin. What kind of crazy asshole is he? "What?" I asked dumbfounded. Was he playing a trick on me? Am I on candy camera? Any second I expected a middle aged balding man to jump out from a booth and yell, "surprise b***h, you dumb!"  "I'm prepared to offer you one million dollars, if that is, you stay abstinent from cursing for one solid year." I basically choked on the now extremely soggy biscuit in my mouth. I don't know why I hadn't swallowed it sooner. A lump rose in my throat, was he being serious? A million f*****g dollars? Hell yes! Maybe I should think about this first? Nah. Not in my dictionary. Now that I take a look at him, he does have that arrogant aura that only a rich bastard could have. "What do you get out of this?" And there it was, everything has a price, right? A smirk rose on his perfectly sculpted face, "if you lose this bet, you have to marry me." He basically spat the words out as if he couldn't stand the way it sounded in his mouth.  "What?! Are you crazy, or just plain stupid?" I couldn't help but feel as if this was a lose-lose for him. Although I knew I wouldn't lose this bet for the world, why would he want to marry me? "Look, I need an heir to my fortune-and my mom wants me to settle down with someone." He said like he was almost bored with the topic. I feel Toby’s aura becoming very uncomfortable. "Then why can't you just fall in love and marry someone like a normal person? Then, you can give me a realistic bet." Because I wouldn't mind the one million dollars, and technically if I do marry him I'll be receiving way more than one million buckaroos. Unless I signed a prenup. Wouldn't it be worth some satisfying s*x for a bunch of money? No, I couldn't do it. I do have some standards I uphold myself to. I may cuss a lot, but I'm saving myself for 'the one' As cliché as that sounds. Call me a hopeless romantic. Chivalry is not dead, I’m sure of it. But his words fully registered in my head suddenly, he wanted me to marry him, and have his baby. This man was cra-zy. "Look, my mother doesn't have more than a three year life span left, and she wants me married with an heir before then--it's the only way I get any of my money. Otherwise it's gone, thrown to the wind--you catch my drift? Nonexistent." Three years? He had plenty of time to fall in love, or at least to convince some poor b***h to marry him. Ironic huh? I'm the poor dumb b***h. Everyone knows at this point that I’m accepting this s**t. He never even thought that I could win this bet, and that already gives me the upper here. Oh. Now that made sense. I see Toby is extremely uncomfortable with the sudden turn in conversation, and I can see that he wants me to decline, even if it does mean I'll stop cursing. "Yeah, but it still doesn't explain why you can't just find a girl you lo-" "I don't believe in love. At least this way I can make my mother happy in her few years left on earth." Maybe I should think about this? I actually really needed a million dollars--think about it, I'll never have a crappy car again. All I have to do is refrain from cussing! That won't be too hard. This asshole is gonna bite the dust.  Toby could see the glint in my eye, but before he could say anything I beat him to it, "deal." Arrogant prick. I'll beat you at your own game. All while winning some major cash on the side, this'll be fun. More like an arcade game than a challenge, really.  I shook his hand, to really seal the deal before my nerves got me to back out. "Molly, what are you doing?"  I ignore Toby and his floundering. I don't break eye contact with the man in the suit. "You're going to regret ever making that deal." He whispered seductively in my ear. "That is a promise."  I swallow hard, never thinking it'd be that hard to swallow saliva. I was on an adrenaline high before, but now I realize why this man couldn't just fall in love and marry some random b***h on the street. His eyes went from playful to ice cold in seconds.  His niceness from before? It was all an act to get me to agree to his terms.  I guess you could say that I've been duped.