It Was Always You

“I don’t think I can do this.” “You will be fine!” Charlotte has been trying for a few weeks now to get me to come out of my doom and gloom since Levi and I broke up. I still wasn’t completely over the break up (which ended badly if I must say) and I wasn’t ready to talk to any new guy she had in mind. But of course she had been talking to some guy the next county over and he just so happened to have a friend that was single. We decided to meet at the local fair and I was grateful that it wasn’t in a dim lit park outside of town. Both of the guys were walking up when Charlotte ran to one of them and wrapped him in a hug. His friend and I looked at each other and just smiled kindly to acknowledge one another was there. Who knows if he was forced out like I was or if he wanted to actually meet someone he never met. I can only imagine what is going through his head at this point. Charlotte introduces me to the friend that she hugged as Devin, and Devin introduced his friend Mason. Mason was about 5’10 and a medium build. Apparently he played on the high school soccer team, like me, and he wasn’t half bad looking. All I was thinking is if Levi was at this same fair and we ran into each other and how I would act walking around with two guys he’s never seen. Screw him, he broke my heart. We decide to walk around the fair and people watch for a little bit. Since I grew up in this town, it was hard not to recognize every face that I saw and wondered if their night was anything like mine. Charlotte and Devin are walking a few paces ahead of Mason and me (which I’m sure was totally planned) and they’re practically walking hand-in-hand at this point. Mason and I continue to walk around and make small talk unsure of what each other is feeling with this whole “set-up.” He would ask me questions and I would give a response, and I would ask him questions and he would give a response. Nothing too out of the ordinary for just meeting each other.  After what felt like forever (I’m sure it was only a 10 minute walk around the fair grounds in my small town), Charlotte and Devin decided that we should go on the Ferris wheel. I was hoping that Charlotte would sit next to me to ease my nerves, but she decided to sit with Devin which left me sitting next to Mason. As if this wasn’t awkward enough. The Ferris wheel goes at its normal pace and I notice Charlotte and Devin sitting close while Mason and I were sitting like someone was in the middle of us. The small talk between Mason and me continues as the wheel goes around, and when it finally stops to let us off, I was afraid that he would try to grab my hand. I practically ran off the ride and waited until everyone met me at the exit to see what was next. We went through the house of mirrors, bought some cotton candy, and continued to walk and people watch. Charlotte and Devin kept a good pace ahead of Mason and me which I can only assume was part of their plan.  The fair was closing and I drove on my own in my little two-door car that got me from point A to point B. Without hesitating, Mason asked if he could walk me to my car. I had never been asked that and I started to panic but all that came out was, “Sure.” When we got to my car, Mason said that he had a really good time just walking around and talking. I’m not sure how that was a good time because my arms were practically glued to my chest to avoid him trying to hold my hand. He asked for my number and I gave it to him. I wasn’t sure if he was going to call or text or just hold on to it in his phone, but it didn’t feel wrong for me to give him those numbers that I memorized since I first got my phone. After he put his phone away, he said that he would text me to make sure I got home safely that night. Honestly, that was the sweetest thing that Levi NEVER did. And then he did it. He went in for the kiss. It was like slow motion. I couldn’t back away because this guy who barely knows me has been so respectful all night long. I stood there and just let my eyes close on their own until I felt his warm lips against mine. My hands went to the back of his neck to hold him a little closer while his hands fell gently against my backside. It felt like we had been in that moment for longer than a minute, but we soon gravitated away from each other. With his sideways smile, that was somehow making me want more, he told me good night and that he would text me soon. Mason, what have you done to me?