What is more addicting? Drugs Or Love?

As I sat here with my girlfriends on saintpatricks day @ ccs bar and grill. Having The Time Of My Life Being Single. I was already feeling good, as in feeling drunk. I looked towards the door I seen 2 guys walk in and goto the bar and grabbed some beers. with my vision blurry i waited a little and then I walked towards them noticing one of the guys. omg it was the guy that I had a crush on when I was 16, I've never really talked to him, I just always heard about him. "Ryan is that you", I said. "Is That You Priscilla" he said. we both smiled real big and gave each other a hug. "When did u get out", I said. "I got out a week ago" he said. Ryan Had Been Gone For 7yrs In Prison. We talked for awhile, until he asked me to go with them. I left with them without telling my girlfriends I was leaving. We Were Both Typsy Saying Stuff That We Didnt Know We Was saying. I Wake Up Next To Him Looking At Him. I Said, "I dont know what was said lastnight, but can we take it slow". he agreed thankfully He Gave Me A Ride Home And soon as we got outside my apt. we told each other we'll talk to each other later. I walked inside my house n walked to my room to gather clothes so I can shower. as I got in the shower I couldn't stop thinking about him. I was confused, i didnt know what i wanted after being single for soo long. I layed down to goto sleep, I get a message it's from him. (Goodnight Beautiful) I didnt reply and I just fell asleep. I Woke Up The Next Morning Still Had Ryan In My Mind. Theres A Knock On My Door. I Get Up To Check And Its My Friend Roxy. I opened the door for her. " What you doing Sis" roxy said. "Just got up bouta make breakfast" I said. As I Cooked Breakfast for the both of us. I told her everything that happened lastnight and how I felt about Ryan. She insist on me going on a date with him to see how it gets since we would be sober. so I took her advice and msged him and asked him if he wanted to goto the movies so we can talk. He agreed and picked me up at 7:30pm. I get in the car and we couldnt stop blushing, you can tell he liked me alot and I can tell I liked him even more. We Stopped at the movies and got out went inside and sat and talked till the movie was going to start. I kinda had second thoughts I told him I couldnt be around him anymore. only cause the reason was that he was my cousins bestfriends sons dad. I didnt want to be seen with him I was kinda scared to be honest. I didnt need any drama in my life cause of the fact that I've been through it with an Exboyfriend. He Was Upset After I Told Him How I Felt. He said,"Let's just chill and see how tonight goes". I agreed Soo we finally walked in the theater to watch the movie and I started to have a good time with him to were it changed my mind about him. I liked him even more, I wanted him, I needed him. He made me feel good and no worries, I had butterflies in my stomach. All we did was laugh and Enjoy each other company. I Had A Great Time. As He Took Me Home He Kissed Me With His Soft Lips. omg I felt a tingle in my body. He hugged me and told me goodnight. I walked out the car just gazing I felt soo good about him. I walked in my apt and into my room I changed clothes to fall asleep in. As I lay down I get a message from him (I want you to come stay the night with me, my mom is going with her boyfriend and I'm going to be here alone). I hesitated a bit, (Yes I will) he messaged back (on my way) I got up and got some stuff together to take with me. I was ready, i sat on my couch and was thinking should I go with him? should I do this? what if his Sons mom finds out, what gonna happen? I didnt care anymore, I told myself To just do it.