September Nights

Kleya's POV There were indelible nights that they were as if the long nights that you would never want to end. They were vivid and at the same time... vague. The nights that we woke up from that brought us varieties of emotions in the morning: Yearning, joy, pain, sometimes hopelessness, or extreme gloom even. But mine has always only been the latter. It has been a normal morning for me. Not until the autumn month started. "What's with the long face first day of the week?" Aki casually sat beside me, munching on his sandwich. "I meant you look sad." He corrected like I didn't get it. I yawned and fixed my seat. Some of our classmates were already talking to each other early in the morning like how students would except for me. Waking up early frustrates me, the early morning sun flaunting me its brightness does not impress me, and neither does Aki has the strength to cheer me up with his morning energy. I bet he wouldn't try to, nonetheless. "You were not born yesterday, Aki." I reminded him. "I know. You're always been like that." He muttered in a matter-of-fact tone. "What are you doing?" I returned to my phone and abruptly showed him what I was reading on my phone. I recently discovered a site where you can anonymously submit content of any of your likes and was open for other users. I was reading one when he arrived. "Without some development, there can be no relationship. I'm not wrong to feel this way and I will not approach someone who will attack me because I suffered when they felt like they were doing an A+ job." "Like I saw." He sarcastically said. I laughed and put down my phone. "Was it a social site?" I nodded. "They were venting out," I said. "Parents issues." I shrugged. I felt his stare as soon as I mentioned the words. "You can vent out on me, too." He casually said. Trust me I know. "How's it?" I shrunk in my seat and stared forward. Some streaks of sunshine were pushing in through the open windows on the side. The streaks made bright spots as they hit the whiteboard in front. "Mom's controlling, Dad's still dismissive. Nothing's new." I said, almost whispering. My eyes followed the specks of dust dancing; tracing the streak of sunlight like it's where they belong. "How about yours?" He showed me a small smile and avoided my gaze. "Don't get used to it, Kleya. Don't try to live it. You deserve better." He sighed and brought his eyes back to mine. After the morning dismissal, Aki asked me to come with him to visit a bookstore café later at night. So we did straight from school. He knew I would be in my best condition by then. The dude's aware I was barely functioning during the day. Monday was the best day to visit the bookstore café. It wouldn't be so packed up as it was the first day of the week—people would be at their workplace or school. The café was located in the town center along with the park, playgrounds, cultural hall, stalls, and church. "What's the plan for your day?" I asked him while I was browsing books on the shelves with him. "When's your day again?" I taunted. He closed the book and looked at me deadpan. I laughed. I reached for his shoulder and brushed gold glitters off his polo uniform—must be from the decoration by the shelves. "Let's celebrate my 17th birthday together." He blurted. "Let's keep it simple though. Church in the morning, dinner at home, and then let's proceed here." He sounded excited I couldn't help but smile. I nodded. "Sure! I'll buy you a book then. Make sure you choose the best one." "And the most expensive one." He added. He pulled a book from the shelf and started walking to the reading corner. I followed him empty-handed, slightly skip walking. He snickered when he noticed what I was doing. He settled himself on one of the tables and I sat across him. I noticed a wooden music box resting by the lamp on the side table. I looked at Aki before reaching it. He raised his head when he heard the melodious sound that the music box emitted. We were both amused by how it sounded. My mouth gaped at how nostalgic that felt like. /// I was lost for a moment hearing the same melodious sound of a music box that was stuck in my head. I was taken aback by the colorful fairy lights in sync with the cold breeze at the park's nightlife. Kids in their brilliant dresses were smiling brightly as their parents were capturing the moment. Some around my age were grinning from ear to ear; their eyes reflected the heavenly luminescence that ruled the place. "Are you okay?" I flinched. I raised my head and saw a guy in a grey-tinged ball cap and black sweater standing in front of me. I chuckled and nodded my head. I scoot over to give him a space beside me. "If you're mad, which would you rather be? The angry one or the crazy one?" he suddenly asked. I stopped my smile from appearing. "I'd rather be crazy," I responded. "It's warm to be crazy over something once in a while." "What would be that something?" He slightly bowed his head to meet my gaze. Our eyes locked. "I want to be crazy over something I've never been in love with," I said, not breaking our eye contact. I snort laughed and looked back at the kids before us. "I don't like the sun. I don't hate it. It's just that." "Be crazy over it then." "How?" I raised my legs and stood on the bench where I sat. I held my right arm up and tried to reach the unattainable mystic of the moon. It was showing off as it should. "If I try to love the sun, doesn't that mean I'll have to turn my back on the moon?" "Are they opposite, though?" he asked back. I looked down on him. "Aren't they?" "Technically, they are. But they complement each other." He raised his head and looked at the moon. I did the same. "The moon looks bright at night because the sun reflects on its surface." I gazed back down at him and admired the way his eyes shimmered. The same melodious sound was heard as a breeze blew, making our hair dance with it. I opened my arms and felt how it embraced me lovingly. That was it. The kind of night you would never want to end. The night before the distress of approaching mornings. /// "Are you kidding me?" Aki looked at me confused. Who wouldn't? I was sitting by the window with the sunbeam hitting my face. It wasn't as scary as I think it would be. "You don't dislike mornings. You dislike the people you see first in the morning." He muttered. I laughed it off. Days went smoothly. I sure think I was doing fine. I would be sitting by the window in the morning, deliberately ignoring the sunbeams and getting used to Aki's strange looks every time it happens. I would not say I was starting to love it. I just learned to live with it. "No, I'll do it later. It's fine with me." I heard Aki talking to his group mates. "I can't make it tomorrow but you guys can do it by then. It would be the same, only I'll do my part today... Okay, thank you. I'll make sure to keep updated." I raised my notebook slightly with the moon and sun across each other on it. I doodled it while I was waiting for Aki to finish their meeting. "Can you pay for my orange juice?" I looked at him with disbelief. He smiled and winked at me, showed his tongue, and struck a peace sign pose. "Pretty disgusting but okay," "Pretty, at least." "Yeah, you are." I accepted. "I am." As I did pay for his orange juice, I noticed how the afternoon sky was on its best ambiance. From the school gate we exited from, the soft daylight was admiring us as much as we were admiring it. The brilliance was just... calm—dismissing complexity. I flinched when two consecutive honks blasted as Aki's hand instinctively grabbed my arm. A familiar grey SUV stopped by the side that made both him and I stop. "Sorry! Just got too excited." The window rolled down as a guy in his grey ball cap and a casual denim jacket over a grey hoodie appeared. I wouldn't have recognized him if he didn't remove his cap. It was Migo, Aki's cousin. "Hop in, you guys." "We're fine, you can go." Aki refused. "Thank you." "Come on, Aki. The sun's barely setting. Kleya's—" His brows furrowed as he turned to me, surprised by how I waved at him with subtle glee. "You've got to be kidding me!" he exaggerated. Aki cringed at Migo as the latter laughed it off and drove past us, leaving another honk. "Kind of piece of crap." "Yeah, kind of." I agreed. Weekends passed like nothing. We did our group activity virtually and I stayed home. Home. At least by how it was called. /// Holding plastic bags of bottles orange beverages and snacks in both hands, I skip walked as I approached him now in his grey hoodie. He chuckled as he fixed mine when it dropped from my movements. Oh, I'm in grey too. "How's your Tuesday?" he smiled as he got the bags from my hands. "Nothing much! Seems pretty normal. Yours?" "Likewise." He shrugged and led me to the corner of the park, guided with the luminescence of faint lamp post. We sat across from each other and did absolutely nothing. We were just smiling like idiots for seconds until he opened the snacks I bought and offered me some. I picked a piece and leaned my back, my head swinging by the melodious song in the background. After a minute, we were laughing hysterically as we were leaning over the table, reading the book of puns in front of us. At times, we would be cringing and laugh and the other times we would look at each other foreheads creased. "Oh God, the best laugh I had in months," I said, still half-laughing. I wiped the tears in the corner of my eyes. "I love your laughs... They are bright as the sun," he muttered. "Though they only appear with the moon." I felt my smile slowly fading; my eyes pasted on his, illuminated by both of the weak light and moon above us. I cleared my throat. A breeze blew that turned the pages of the book on the table—revealing its glossy wine red cover. The music box beside it caught my attention. I reached for it. "This music box wouldn't work without someone revolving its cylinder," I said, revolving it and welcoming the sound it produced. "Does that make it useless without that person?" "Is it still called music box even if no one's playing it?" he countered. I was taken aback. It still is a music box. "Then its worth doesn't change." I heard the sound of his smile when I didn't answer. I felt mine unconsciously did it too as I sighed in relief. I leaned back and heard myself laughing which was eventually complemented by his. The surrounding is dim but my heart feels otherwise. I can barely see his face but his warmth is vivid. It is clear. He feels like a dream... but the nobility of the moonlight assures me he's not... at least not literally. I felt a tear rolling down my cheek. I felt like floating. The feeling of relief and ease in my chest was overwhelming I thought it's too good to be true. If it turned out to be a dream, I would make sure to find the path to it again... /// I opened my eyes—and stared at the ceiling again. Like what I always do... but now because of how I couldn't believe the feeling. I couldn't believe the universe would allow me to feel this kind of sensation again. I've never been this thankful to be given a chance to witness the morning. I got up and went straight to the window, now gone the semi-permanent cover. I leaned over and closed my eyes as the sun-kissed my face. My lips formed a relieved smile—one I didn't know would be possible. "Could I even be forgiven for hating you for months?" I muttered to myself, eyes still shut closed. After a minute, I started preparing for school. Went out of my room, and sighed with a smile, before proceeding to dine area. "Good morning," I greeted my parents as I sat in my usual seat to start breakfast. "Morning." My mom replied and dad only nodded. "You got home early yesterday. Did you not visit the café with Aki?" "How did you—" I stopped. Of course! Of course, she knew. "We only stop by during Mondays. And he hangs out with his grandma who came to visit. He has to go home early." My grip tightened in my utensils. I saw Mom looking at my hands. I sighed as I loosen it up. After I survived breakfast just fine, I stopped by Aki's house so we can go to school together. The dude must have overslept I had to wait for him for minutes. "You must have had a blast yesterday," I commented, watching him running back to the chair's backrest where his jacket was hanging and putting it in his bag. "Dude, calm down!" "You're pressuring me!" he laughed. "I'm not. Just slow down." I calmly said. "How was yesterday? You had fun?" His smile widened. "Yep! I loved it... so much I wish it never ended." "You must love your granny so much." "Hmm?" He raised his head from fixing his bag. "Oh—yeah. S-she's been there since I was a toddler." We arrived at school just a few minutes before the teacher entered. After some discussions, she immediately went out after she left us a seatwork. It was easy that eventually made the classroom filled with our classmates' overlapping conversations. "Should we stop by the café later?" Aki suddenly asked. "All of a sudden?" "Nice breaking the routine once in a while." He shrugged, receiving a weird look from me but I eventually nodded. Bits of water splashed as my shoe hit their little pond. Aki held a grip of my uniform sleeve and guided me on the steps by the café's entrance. Aki and I both looked back as the rain suddenly stopped. "Sky's shitting with us." He smirked. Upon entering, I let Aki return his borrowed book as I proceed to the table where we've always been sitting. The place has always been this cozy. From the glass wall, the road was seen healing from the rain. "Kleya, have you been fine these days?" Aki asked after suddenly putting his book down. "Your eyes shimmer like a genuine bliss." I was taken aback. I chuckled when I processed his words. "Hmm. They reflect yours." A genuine smile appeared on his lips. "You deserve all the reasons behind them, Kleya. I want you to be happy. Your eyes shine every time you are... I don't want them to fade." His words were enchanting. They sounded genuine which burned all my heart's doubts. "I want the same for you, Aki." I looked straight into his eyes. I wanted him to feel I meant it. "You deserve everything that makes your heart beat." /// I watched the sky making its way to gloom. A thunder roared but it didn't even make me wince. The wind that came with it complemented the vibe. "Come on, Kleya!" A hand pulled my arm dragging me to the ground where streaks of rain started pouring. I heard him laugh that eventually led me to do the same. Numbers of people were rushing their way to shelter. They were too busy saving themselves from the pouring to even notice us. Our laughs chimed better when the rain started pouring harder as it hit the ground of the park. Muds were covering our shoes but we're too immersed to care. My heart was jumping with joy with all the carelessness, the heavy pouring, and him holding my hand. We were smiling ear to ear as we copied each other's swinging motions. We were hearing the same melodious sound that we danced slowly to. "Under the heavy rain were two people dancing with freedom," he muttered as he pulled my arm closer to his. "They held each other like the closeness was how they want their freedom to taste like." His eyes stared at mine with warmth despite the cold raindrops. His fringes fell into his brows like how my heart did for him. "Even with everything constantly changing, I want your smile to remain the same." I closed my eyes and savored how his words pinched my heart with extreme euphoria. He held my hand gently and turned me around. He circled his arm around my waist and pulled me even closer. The music was heard even louder competing with the sound of my heartbeats. I deserve these. Our bodies swayed in sync with all the leaves dancing around us, with the beauty of the night guided by the moon, and the unexplainable sensation in my chest. We deserve all of these. The permission of the night can't tell us otherwise. These September Nights said we do. /// After locking the door behind me, I grinned ear-to-ear and skip walked while making my way out of our gate. My hair bounced with me as the sunshine kept me company. It's still 15 minutes early for school but it's much later than my usual time. I arrived at our classroom with Aki's seat yet to be occupied. It's unusual for him too. 10 minutes passed and Aki still hasn't come. I reached him through my phone but to no avail. I should have stopped by their house. Class started still without him beside me. He must have overslept. Minor performance tasks and a group activity were given for tomorrow. I did my best to have everything taken note of for his absence. I also came through with his supposed-to-be group mates to relay important notes and info. It was already 5 in the evening when my group mates and I finished our meeting and preparations for the presentation tomorrow. The sky was calm, there was a blanket of stars and the supreme moon beside them. "Kleya!" Migo was surprised when he saw me by Aki's gate. He was just about to enter. "What are you doing here this late? You came straight from school?" He asked as he scanned my uniform. I nodded. My eyes went down to a plastic bag he was holding . "Oh, right! Aki's sick. You wanna come in?" "He's sick?" My forehead creased. "Yeah. The dude has a cold. His parents were out. Come in." He was perfectly fine yesterday at the library! We weren't that wet when the rain poured. Migo placed some medicines he bought on Aki's side table. He told me the time he'll take them after I volunteered to stay longer before he went back out. My eyes shifted to Aki who's sleeping soundly. A cloth was placed on his forehead as his lower body was covered with a thick comforter. I sighed. "What have you been doing?" I asked softly as I pulled a chair to sit on. I pulled the notes I made for him from my bag and placed them beside his medicines. "You should have been more careful..." An hour passed with just me staring at him for I have nothing else to do. I noticed the time and gently woke him up to take his meds. His tired eyes bore into mine. "Kleya?" he mumbled in a weak voice. "Time for medicine. How are you feeling?" I asked and he nodded, his eyes blinking weakly. "Better, I guess. Just feeling a little tired." He answered. "What time is it? You should go home." I helped him get up as I reached for his medicine and a glass of water. He took it without a problem. I replaced the cool damp washcloth on his forehead and helped him lie down properly again. "Thank you, Kle." He showed me a smile before drifting in his sleep again. My eyes scanned his room. A red book caught my attention. I walked towards his study table and reached for it. It was Art Moger's "The Best Book of Puns". I halted for a second. I scanned the book as texture papers fell from it. I picked them back up and immediately froze as I processed what I have just seen. They were Polaroid pictures. They were pictures of him and a girl. He's on a black sweater and grey ball cup and the girl was in a white hoodie. Busy background and fairy lights were seen behind them. The other ones were both of them in grey hoodies at the dim park, the red book of puns, snacks, and orange beverages on the table. The last two were them in the park's corridor and them... dancing in the rain. My mouth gape as my breathing halted. My hands shook uncontrollably. The pictures fell but I didn't care. I quickly ran out of the room. Migo was startled but he wasn't able to move when he saw me rushing out. I heard him shouting my name but I didn't look back. I found myself at the park. I didn't know how. My feet brought me here. The constant pounding in my chest produced beats that triggered the hot tears to fall—as if they weren't allowed to stop. The throbbing in pain almost felt like it was wrapped with sharp nails. I gasped for air. My sight blurred with the surrounding noise ringing in my ears. I felt betrayed. Why can't I own them? The dreams were mine! They were my memories! They were the only place where I felt I deserved it! To some extent, at least I know I deserved it! I needed it... He said I deserved it... Then why can't it be mine? It should be mine... Everything was in slow motion, my hands were shaking, and my mind was completely blank. A cold autumn breeze gusted and brushed my cheek, stinging its numbness from all the burning tears. "Why... why c-can't it be mine?" My lips muttered the words like they were fire, constantly burning the odds of being justified. "Y-you assured me..." I raised my head and for some reason, the moonlight was the only clear figure in sight. "It's supposed to be my memory... t-they are my dreams... my—my September nights." I sobbed. The laughs I had with him and the book under the faint light... All of the assurance... comforting... All the heavenly serenity I felt from him... Were they not mine, too? Were they all hers? A cold wind was felt again. It blew like it caressed my skin... as if it answered for the moon. The moon was now hiding behind the thick leaves siding with it. Like it refused to answer me... because it knew it will break me. The moon comforted me with lies... For she knew the reality couldn't. - END.