17
1018 Words
Chapter Seventeen
Seokjin heaved a deep sigh when the camera finally stops rolling. Finally, he's done with the shoot for today and can finally have some rest and after this, he got a week for him to stay in the comfort of his bed.
He made sure to bring his car today so that he can go as soon as they are done filming for a certain brand of a smartphone. He just signed a three year contract with them and his fans are very happy for his another project.
He immediately changed into his black pants, brown shirt and sneakers. After saying goodbye to the staff, he already made his way out with the help of his manager and the security.
When he reached the luxurious condo building that he's currently living in, he parked his car letting out a deep sigh as he walked towards the entrance.
He doesnt have any plans for the whole week, he just wants to sleep and stay in his home. He can hang out with his friends but he doubt that he would be out for so long, he rarely goes out when he has a free time.
When he's finally inside his home, he just lazily put his duffle bag on the couch before slouching down. He is not in the mood. No, he is never in the mood these days.
He almost jumped out of his seat when his phone suddenly rang so rolling his eyes- he answered it when he saw Jimin's name on the screen.
"Yes, Chim?"
Jimin let out an exasperated sigh when he heard how down Seokjin sounds.
"Do you wanna sleepover? I can pick you up?" He asked trying to lift his friend's mood up.
Seokjin cant help but to smile because of how considerate his friend is. Though, he doesnt think that it would be better for him to go.
"Thanks, Chim. But I really wanna sleep right now, as in right in this moment."
Jimin rolled his eyes not really believing the fact that his friend's only reason was he's tired, there's more into it.
"Oh! C'mon. Dont be too salty about it. Please, dont let him affect you!" Jimin exclaimed.
Seokjin chuckled shaking his head a little as if the man from the other line can see him doing the gesture.
"That's not it, Chim. I have to go now, bye."
He didnt wait for his friend to finish up what he's saying and just ended the call already. He doesnt want to hear what is he going to say, Jimin always says the things that he could see and that would affect Seokjin bigtime.
He thought that he forgot about him already, he thought that he's already fine without him and he is doing better. Who is he kidding, though?
He used to believe that when Jungkook went out that night, he will be gone for a day or two even a week would be fine for Seokjin. That's why it broke his damn heart when a month has passed and there is still no signs of his boyfriend.
He cried so much begging for Taehyung to find Jungkook and telling him to say that he is very sorry for all the things that he said. He loves Jungkook all too much, Seokjin made the aspiring artist his other half- the reason as to why he fell apart when he didnt really came back.
Seokjin lost the man- the person whom he consider as his whole world.
The love that he has for Jungkook slowly turns into hatred, resentment and so much more. He hates Jungkook for leaving him without even telling it right to his face, he wants him to atleast break it off to him rather than just leaving and still making him hope that he will come back.
Now, four years has passed. Seokjin stood up again, all better and much more succesful. He didnt became the educator like how he dreams to be but he's an inspiration to a lot of people and is also the cause of other's happiness.
He got the money, influence and the name but that is all useless to him. He's not a materialistic person. He never wants too much and now that he got more than what he needs, he felt emptier.
He cant help but think what would happen if Jungkook is still in his life, he loves him. He havent heard of him until now. He's mad but he always pray that he is safe and happy. Though, after getting back up- he stops wishing to see him.
In fact, he is very much afraid to see Jungkook.
He is afraid to see the man that he loves so much. He thought that he already did everything for him, is that not enough? Yes, those words might've hurt him but he's just really exhausted and in pain that time. Worst, he regretted everything right after he said those things.
"Stupid, stupid, stupid."
Seokjin bit his lower lips when tears starts to continuously stream down his face. He clutched onto his chest choking on his own tears as he shut his eyes closed begging for all the pain to stop coming back.
He laughed at himself, "Stop, you doesnt need an asshole." He mumbled.
He ran his fingers through his hair with his lips quivering along with his shaking eyes full of unshed tears. He wants to stop crying, he wants to stop getting affected by the person who probably doesnt even care about him anymore.
Jungkook not caring about him. That though, that thought made him cried even more. He still loves Jungkook even after all the pain of getting left behind, he still loves him so dearly even after all the exhausted night of working his ass of and he wouldnt exchange the moments that he had with Jungkook for anything.
But knowing that the man he keeps on thinking about is not with him right now, it makes him feel empty, broken and used.
"You can do this, Seokjin." He said trying to encourage himself.
- Writer
