BETWEEN THE DEVIL AND THE DEEP BLUE SEA

Unwanted feelings

The unthinkable was done, her deal with her mother was done. "Easy peasy" was what her mother had named it. I mean, after all, all she did was betray the trust her father had for her, risk Damian's marriage and best of all, loose the virginity she had saved for that special person she hoped to find one day. "Yes, easy peasy," she said after getting off the phone with her mother. The next stage was to send the steamy, suggestive pictures to her even though she had no idea what she was sending them for and then get ready to go home. The whole thing was weighing too hard on her which was the reason why she was hesitant to go downstairs for Christmas day's dinner. "Amelia, we are starving. Will you please get down here so we can eat?" her father yelled for the third time and his voice echoed all the way up to her room. She knew everyone was growing restless so she just walked out with her hands held behind her back and her fingers crossed. Daniel and Sarah thought she was acting that way because it was her first dinner with the whole family in like ten years. "Don't you feel shy now dear, this is still your home and I am glad your mother finally let you come back to me...come on, we don't get to eat together often which makes today a very special day. Go on," Daniel made sure to pull out a chair for her and confirmed that she was comfortable enough.

What everyone didn't know however, was that Amelia didn't want to be there. A mixture of guilt and shame were convincing her that she needed to be as far away from the family as possible. A whirlwind of thoughts was storming through her mind affecting her appetite. "See, I specially made the chicken for you, I hope its still your favorite. By the way, after dinner, you and I are gonna go for a swim and talk a little," he concluded and his smile quickly faded. "Oh oh, someone is in trouble," Amelia said to ease her worry. She may have been too young back then but she still remember that whenever his dad suggested for a night swim an a talk, something was either very wrong or very right somewhere. "No no, it is the happy kind of swim," he assured her to her relief but still, the faded smile signaled that something was wrong and she thought she had an idea what.

She picked up her phone just in time to see the text. "Do you think he knows? He told me the same thing too," it was from Damian. Her thoughts went back to the previous day. She remembered her dad calling out loud from the door. She and Damian had just finished with the s*x and he was holding her tight as he tried to catch his breath. An awkward moment had followed as Amelia ren up and down the room picking up and dropping her clothes unsure of what to do. "Jump into the shower because I am sure he will be coming to my room now," she had suggested but that didn't sound solid enough to Damian. "Better yet, I run to my old room in the corner and shower because girl, we really need that," without any hesitation, Damian ren out of the room forgetting his shirt on her bed. Amelia did a fast cover up job by badly making her bed before jumping into the shower. "Amelia dear, may I come in?" her father was by then right at the door. "Yeah but just so you know, I am in the shower," she warned and he knew what that meant. "Okay, come downstairs as soon as you are done," he yelled as he made his way down the stairs. That was when the realization of what she had done hit her and she was besides herself with guilt.

Her father had waited for her for almost half an hour and at last decided to check on her. This time around, Amelia let him into her room and only noticed Damian's shirt when his dad had already spotted it. She did manage to get rid of it but she feared it was already too late. Things however got worse when she went downstairs and found Sarah seated on the couch. The guilt inside her seemed to have multiplied infinitely and since then she had been avoiding the two until now. "Are you sure you are fine?" Daniel asked, bringing Amelia back to the moment. She was quick to nod her head and to prove it, she stuffed a spoonful of rice into her mouth.

While she was struggling to cope, Damian seemed perfectly fine. He would still hold his wife's hand from time to time and even managed to throw in a few pecks every once in a while. Amelia was supposed to feel a little secure since Damian was holding it together for the both of them but that wasn't the case. Instead, she was feeling agitated, angry even. How could he be all loving to Sarah when only yesterday he was rolling in bed with her? and most importantly, why did she seem to hate it so much. She had convinced herself that she was done with him now that she had already done what had brought her to the house but why was she so jealous. Why did she suddenly have a newly found hate for Sarah despite the fact that they got along nicely. "Could it be...? Oh no it can't be that. He is married and he is my brother. Well, not biological but still..." she thought and in that moment, all the guilt she was feeling melted down, leaving only shame and jealousy. She had just discovered that in the four months she had been working overtime to seduce him it is not just him she manged to get to, no, she also managed to fall for him and that wasn't something she was looking forward to but here she was. "No, I can't...I am not that kind of a person. I can't break them apart my father would never forgive me for that," the thoughts went on. "Dad, can I please be excused, I am not feeling very well," She finally said and walked off even before he could say anything. "Sure," his father replied but by then, she was already halfway up the stairs. "Well, I think the homesickness finally got to her. She has never been far from her mother for this long and especially not during the holidays maybe I should just let her visit even though she might never come back," Daniel said with a sad but concerned face. "No, just let her be, she will get over it sooner rather than later. I mean, look how happy you have been lately with her around. You also deserve to be close to her," Sarah said giving the old man the very statement he wanted to hear. "But she is eighteen already, doesn't she get to choose what she want to do. I say, if she want to go home, let her go," Damian said even though deep down his words wounded him deeply. "See, this is why I needed to talk to the both of you! how can she feel at home if you, her brother doesn't want her around. I thought you wanted me to mend my relationship with her," this time round, one could even feel the pain in the old man's voice. "Wait, that was the reason you wanted to go for a night swim," the relief on Damian's face was obvious to everyone's surprise.