Behind the curtains

'Omar! Are you gay? ' his friend Aman asked him while they both were lying together in bed watching random tick-tocks. On hearing this, Omar was so shocked, like someone had found the truth he had been hiding for years. He didn't know what to answer. And instead of answering him, he stood up and left the room and went into the balcony, the space where he spent most of his alone time.That was his escape mechanism. An escape from reality. Omar was the youngest son of his parents. He was born in an Islamic household and brought up with pure Islamic customs. It was his parents' dream that one of their children should be a doctor. In order to fulfill their dream, he decided to choose the medical field. After completing his high school studies, he decided to prepare for the entrance exam at medical colleges. He always believed in hard work and, due to his arduous nature, he got enrolled in a very well-known and established medical institution. But the college was in another state of his country. In order to pursue his studies, he shifted to the boys hostel of that college. He was standing on the balcony thinking about the question Aman asked him. All he wanted was to cry out loudly and say 'Yes! Yes! I'm gay and I'm tired of hiding this.' Being born in an Islamic household, he knew from the very beginning he had to live with this hidden identity. He knew from his childhood that he was different. He had a shy and secretive personality. Unlike his brothers, he was not interested in arduous outdoor sports. He used to spend all his day playing with dolls and making clay pots. In high school , where every other boy in his class was dating girls, he was involved in books and stories. While standing on the balcony, his mind flew back. He started remembering his past years. The first thought in his mind was the story of realization. The realization of his identity, his sexuality and the crime and the biggest sin according to the society he was living in. He came out in his fifth standard when he was 13. It was a sports period when all the students left the classroom to go to a school basketball match. As usual , Omar was late. He had not completed his history homework and was busy doing that. The teacher warned him to leave the class in five minutes and join the class on the ground as soon as possible. After giving warning to the students, he left the class. All the boys left the class until he and his classmate Ali were left behind. He was busy doing his homework when suddenly Ali came to him. Omar got confused on seeing him at his desk. He asked him hesitatingly ' What happened! Do you need anything? ' The answer was the most unexpected thing to Omar. The answer he still remembers word by word. Ali answered him ' I like you. I feel something for you.' And after that, he immediately left the classroom. Omar was stunned. He was not expecting this answer even in his wildest dream. He sat there with a stunned face. He was busy thinking about this when someone passed behind him. It was one of his classmates. He turned and they both said hello to each other and then he went on his way while Omar kept standing there. He started thinking again about the past and especially about Ali. At that time, Ali was new in the class. He joined the school only three months before. His father was an Army person. He was transferred to that city a few months back. At the same time, he was his neighbor and their mothers had developed a very close friendship recently.In the night, he kept thinking about Ali all the time, staring at the roof. He knew that Ali felt something for him. He could notice this feeling in his eyes but he was not sure . The way he used to look at him,his expressions told this, but he was not ready to accept it. The next day, while leaving for school, he saw Ali in front of his house. He was looking at him in the same way. Then they both went to school. That day, he again came to his desk at the same time in the sports period when there was no one in the class.On seeing him, Omar stood up from his chair and started walking towards the door. Ali called to him from behind ' Stop Omar! I just want to hear your answer.Tell me you feel the same thing for me.' ' No! I don't feel anything for you and for God's sake please stay away from me ' he replied. But that was the first lie he told him.He had feelings for Omar about which he was not sure or he was afraid to tell him.The fear behind this hidden feeling was of different origins. It was society, his parents, losing friends and fear of being bullied in school. The days went on. He started ignoring Ali until one day when he arrived with his mom at Omar's. It was his mother who invited them for lunch . Omar was sitting on the sofa watching a teen drama when they entered his house. His mother welcomed them and asked them to sit.There was time for lunch as it was getting ready. His mother asked him to show Ali his room and gaming collection and their mothers started working in the kitchen as besties. Omar looked towards him in the way that he didn't want to do that, but she had already told him to be obedient in front of the guests. Unwillingly, he led him toward his room without looking at him.They both went into his room. For some time, they didn't know what to talk about and both sat on the sofa at some distance. Finally, Omar asked him ' Do you like video games ? I have a good collection of them.' ' Not much! I prefer physical sports over video games. But it's okay. Show me your collection, ' Ali replied. Then they chose a car racing game and started playing it. During the game, Omar was dominant as he was expert. He then started teaching Ali. For a few minutes, Omar forgot everything Ali told him. Due to his constant efforts, this time Ali won the game.They both looked towards each other and started smiling. That was the point when Ali made his first move. He held his hand. Then he kissed him on his lips. But Omar didn't say anything. He couldn't control his feelings for him and kissed him back. They both had a passionate kiss. But before they go further, their mothers start calling them for lunch.This was the start of a beautiful love story that ended in the most tragic way. Omar was lost in his thoughts standing on the balcony of the hostel when he noticed tears on his face. It was still hurting him and he was still letting it go. He thought that he would not let anyone know the truth and make up some story in front of Aman in order to answer his question. Meanwhile, someone came from behind and started saying something he could not even think ' I like you Omar. I feel something for you.' Omar turned back , it was no one but Aman. The same words , exact same words, someone had told him after years .Is this the start of another love story? Will this end again in the most tragic way? There were many questions running in his mind and again, without answering Aman's question, he went back to his room.