Chapter one
I remember the first time I considered ending my life was on the night of my wedding.
I had tied the knot with Ethan, the Alpha of my pack, and I felt like I had struck gold. I was happy, my wolf was happy, It wasn't because he was the Alpha, I didn't care about his status. I was happy because he had convinced me that he loved me as much as I loved him.
When I discovered we were mates, everyone praised me and said how fortunate I was to be mated with an Alpha, but I didn't pay attention to his rank in the pack.
Before we performed the mating ceremony and wedding everything was flawless, and It felt like a wish fulfilled for me. He used to take me out on dates and complimented me on my beauty, expressing his love for me, and even though my wolf was dormant I'd accompany him on his runs, but his true nature was revealed afterwards.
And now I found myself as a solitary outcast with only one friend, Annalise. What's even worse is that on days like today when I desperately needed contact with someone else I had to sneak out since he didn't let me go anywhere or let anyone come to see me.
Just like always, I made certain to return home at least two hours before he was expected to arrive. He wouldn't be back from the pack council meeting for at least another two hours. Or so I assumed as I made my way back home.
When I arrived home, I double-checked that I had parked the car in the same spot as when he left the house. He had left the house in his wolf form so I was able to use his car. I quickly unlocked the front door and hurried up the stairs to change into what I was wearing when he left before heading to the kitchen to prepare his favourite meal, as it was our anniversary. Although he treated me like I was the reason for everything that went wrong in his life I still tried to make the marriage work.
Upon opening the door, what I saw sent shivers down my spine. Ethan was seated on my bed, wearing a wicked smile.
"E-Ethan, you've returned home early," I stuttered, feeling frightened about what he might do. "What, did I disrupt your perfect plan?" He rose from his seat and advanced toward me, anger evident in his clenched fist. "Is this what you do when I'm not around? Go around sleeping with other men?" "N-no, I just went to see my friend. I'm sorry," I quickly apologized as he came closer.
Even though he would feel if I slept with another person due to the mating bond he liked to accuse me of cheating even though he was constantly cheating on me with another she wolf every chance he got which was several times per month. And each time the pain came like a stab in the gut sending me to the ground in pain as I heard my wolf whimpering out of heartbreak.
"I don't believe you, you're a stupid w***e and it's all you'll ever be. You disgust me." Immediately the words were out of his mouth he ran to the bathroom and threw up.
He was drunk, it was a good thing, at least he was less harmful to me this way.
"Give me some aspirin you b***h!" He yelled as he staggered back into the room and dropped on the bed.
I hurried to the medicine cabinet in his bathroom to retrieve the pain relievers and a bottle of methylated spirit to tend to the bruises I spotted on his knuckles. Since alcohol slows down the healing reflexes in werewolves. Returning to my room, I handed it to him, and he swallowed the pill without water.
"Would you like some ice for your eye?" I inquired, noticing that his eye was beginning to swell.
"You'd enjoy that, wouldn't you? Seeing me in pain." He sneered
"I just asked if you wanted some ice to help with the" I tried to explain but he cut me short.
"You think living with a disgusting slut like you for a whole year isn't enough torture? I have to drink just so I can stand your presence, I wonder how the men you f**k live themselves."
The words hurt me even though there were no men and I should be used to the way he treats me by now but every time it's a fresh wave of pain that washes over me as I hear the man who is supposed to be the love of my life tell me how much I disgust him.
Initially, he continued to pretend while we were in public, but eventually, he no longer cared about who was watching as he openly displayed his true feelings about me.
"Now, half of the pack members are gazing at me with pity, but they refrain from speaking about their Alpha, while the other half that supports him believes I deserve it.
"May I examine your hand?" I whispered as tears streamed down my cheeks. He extended the hand with the bruised knuckles toward me, but his complexion suddenly turned pale.
"We need to get to the bathroom quickly," I said, knowing he was about to vomit again, but he smiled and locked eyes with me.
"Why bother when I have perfectly good trash here." Before I could understand his meaning, Ethan came closer to me and vomited the contents of his stomach all over my body.
And I understood his message clearly; I was the trash.
I ran into the bathroom and cried and screamed while scrubbing my body hoping if I washed hard enough could erase the memory. I could feel my wolf was angry with me, despite the fact that she was dormant she made her opinions very clear to me, she couldn't understand why I stayed with him, but it was my parents' last wish before they died that I be safely mated to the Alpha and I didn't want to break that. Not to mention the pain of breaking the mate bond. There are stories of she-wolves who ran mad from it.
By the time I came out of the bathroom, my eyes were swollen and red from all my crying but at least Ethan was gone. I put on my clothes and after I searched the house to make sure he wasn't around I went back to my room to clean it up trying hard not to remember what had happened.
I was about to crawl under my blanket when I heard the front door open. He was back already. I decided to pretend I was sleeping but he kept yelling my name, when I still didn't respond he started to call to me through our mating bond. I got out of bed and went downstairs where his voice was coming from and for the second time that day, I froze.
Standing next to my husband was Freya, his high school girlfriend. He kept pictures of her in the house so I knew who she was. I can't believe he brought home his ex on our anniversary. Every time I thought he had shown me his worst I was proven wrong.
"Freya this is Lianna the maid," my heart sank aside and heard him introduce me to his wife, his mate as a maid as a maid to none other than his mistress. "And Lianna this is Freya, the love of my life and the mother of my unborn pup."
"What?" What was he trying to say?
"You heard right, she's pregnant with my pup, the future head of this pack."
I fell to the floor out of shock and they both laughed at me. Ethan had never had s*x with me, not even on our wedding night so I assumed something was wrong with his member. I guess he found me that unappealing.
"I don't understand," I murmured. Why me? Why is this happening to me?
"In case It's not obvious, you may be my Luna in name but this is my real Luna and I expect you to treat her that way." My ears rang and the tears wouldn't stop flowing from my eyes as my heart got shattered repeatedly while my wolf howled in pain.
"Freya, Lianna here is for all purposes your maid, whatever you need her for, massaging your feet or washing your clothes, and my personal favourite taking care of sick people." He laughed at me as I remembered what he had done to me. 'Don't do this.' My wolf yelled at me.
"No," I muttered, I couldn't do this anymore. I imagined the kind of life I would have serving and cleaning up after my husband's mistress would be ten times worse than what I was currently facing with him.
"No?" He smirked.
"I want a divorce. I want unto break the mating bond." There was a glint in his eyes that made it obvious he planned this. Part of the reason I didn't want to end the marriage was that I didn't want to be separated from the man I loved who was my mate and over time his words got to me, what if I was truly worthless? But why didn't he just reject me since he hated me that much, I wondered.
"There you go. I Alpha Ethan, Reject you Lianna as my luna and my mate with the moon goddess as our witness. Happy anniversary."