Lucifer's Gift

Chapter 4 - The Proposal

‘Excuse me?’ I exclaimed as I scooted back on the couch.

‘Marry me.’  I stood up and looked at him, appalled by what I am hearing.

‘No!’ I started pacing the room.

‘Why not?’

‘Because…’ I put my hands on my head and let out a huge groan. ‘Because you’re the devil!’

‘Yes, that is one name that I am called.’ He leaned back in and seemed to enjoy my rant and breakdown.

‘Why? You don’t even know me!’

‘I’d like to.’ I raked my fingers down my face in frustration.

‘This is… This is stupid! I am an angel! I was-‘

‘Fallen.’

‘What?’ He stood up and sighed.

‘You are a fallen angel, like me. You were stripped of everything that you had after you died and then you were cast down to this pathetic purgatory to live out the rest your days…’

‘No.’ I calmly interrupted. ‘It’s not like that anymore.’

‘What do you mean?’

‘I mean that people are actually given a second chance.’ I sat down on the couch folded my hands.

‘When you were cast out, you rebelled against your father. Now, people fall for different reason. Sometimes it’s the rules. Sometimes it’s earthly desires. Sometimes… they can’t decide what side of the fence you’re on. That’s how I fell.’ He gave me a weird look.

‘A second Chance?’

‘I wasn’t that great of a great person the first time around. I had a loving family and kids and I pushed them away. I drank, I cheated, I smoked and did drugs. Cocaine was my drug of choice. I worked myself to death, sort of. I was high on coke, having s*x with a co-worker after hours when a nearby filing cabinet crushed us. He was the lucky one and survived.

I was put into a queue to be judged. While I waited, they gave me wings and a halo, as if nothing were wrong. I got to walk around the afterlife like I belonged. Then came the day that I was judged. I was about to be sent to Hell when they offered me a second chance.’

I let out a heavy sigh. ‘Now to get back to heaven, I have to live my life until I die again and then I will be judged again. If I am worthy a second time, then I go back to heaven and never leave. If not, then…’

‘Then you go to hell and be with me.’ I looked down and nodded. ‘Then why not go ahead and marry me and go down there as the ruler of Hell? It is a 50/50 chance you would make it down there and when you do, this offer will not be on the table. All pitchforks and burning at that point.’

I started to think about this. Why am I thinking about this?

‘What’s in it for you?’

‘I get a mate. I get to have someone to rule Hell with and, on a lucky occasion, we’d vacation in Bermuda.’ I wanted to giggle at that last part, but I held my smile. ‘Also, I’d have someone to be with and YOU, my dear Angel, won’t have to be hungry, lonely or abused again.’

Why do the deals with the devil always have to sound so tempting?