The Ones She Left Behind

Chapter Four

Maggie stared at her reflection in the full-length mirror as she applied the final touch to her first day of school attire: ice pink lip gloss.

Satisfied, she stepped into the hall and grabbed her book bag. She had spent the weekend trying to find her school supplies, which had been made difficult with school already being back in session. She did, at least, manage to find a pink and black bag, which had been her first choice in previous years.

After walking upstairs, she peeked inside Lani's room, finding her aunt still fast asleep. Maggie envied her. School was just starting and she already longed for summer break. At least, for once, she had friends prior to starting at a new school.

"I guess I'm seeing myself off," she murmured as she stepped outside, locking the door behind her.

Topher, as always, was right beside her, and just like every previous new school experience she had had, she knew that he would be with her, which always made the experience more bearable. He had been quiet for the rest of the weekend, though. He remained with her, but he also seemed to be miles away at the same time.

Before stepping onto the road, Maggie paused and turned to her best friend. "Topher, is something wrong?"

He met her gaze, but she couldn't read his expression. "Why?"

"You've just been awfully quiet the last couple days. Actually, ever since Lewis asked me out. Is that what's bothering you?"

"I just want you to be happy, but I also want you to be safe," he said. "If this makes you happy, I'm not going to stand in your way, but I'm also not going to let you get hurt, either."

"Then, if you're okay with me going on this date, what's bothering you?"

He shook his head. "It's nothing."

"Talking about it might help you feel better," she said. "Please let me help you. Lord knows you helped me enough times."

His lips curled into a small smile, but Maggie could sense a hint of pain behind it. "The best thing you can do to help me is stop worrying about me."

Maggie sighed as she continued walking. It was no use to pry into Topher's head if he didn't want her to know something. She learned that the hard way when she was younger, but that often wasn't enough for her to stop trying. When it came to him, she herself was an open book. He knew all her secrets, all of her dreams, her anxieties, her nightmares . . . He knew everything, but she often remembered how little she knew about him.

Eleven-year-old Maggie sat cross-logged on her bed across from Topher. The window was open, and two were looking out into the night sky as they had done every night from the day they met.

"Did you used to look at the stars before you met me?" Maggie asked.

Topher nodded. "Sometimes."

"Did you do it alone, or did you have a friend around? Did you have brothers or sisters do it with you?"

He shook his head. "I was usually alone, except for the occasions I was with my mother."

Maggie swallowed the lump in her throat. "You never talk about your mom. What is she like?"

He shrugged, looking back at the sky. "How you would expect a mom to be, I guess. Nothing unusual."

"What about your dad? Or, did your mom raise you alone?"

He shook his head. "I had both, but I really don't want to talk about them right now."

Maggie stared at the bed. "Oh. Okay. Maybe another time, then. I'd really like to hear about them. Your parents must be better than mine, and I'd love to hear stories about a normal family."

He shook his head. "You'll have to search elsewhere if you want that kind of story. I have no interest in my human past and would rather it be left in the past. I'm not the same person I was when I was human, and my life back then is unimportant."

Maggie shook away the memory. To this day, he still wouldn't talk about his human life, and it left her wondering how bad it could've been. Or, was he just stubborn? Maybe it was some combination of the two.

Once they reached the bus stop at the end of the street, Maggie stopped and stared at him. Surrounded by a few others, she couldn't talk to him, but she hoped her expression was enough to convey what she was thinking. Topher, however, wasn't looking at her and was instead staring off into the distance.

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When the bus arrived at school, Maggie grabbed her bag and got off. She glanced around for Topher, but he wasn't behind or beside her. Anxiety crept up inside her, but she tried to squash it before it could consume her. Topher was definitely there, and she knew he would find her soon.

Taking her schedule out of her bag, she scanned it. She had no idea where anything was or what floor her classroom was even on. Her only choice was to walk and hope that she would find someone who seemed friendly enough to ask for help.

As she walked, she wasn't paying much attention and bumped into someone from behind.

"Excuse me, sorry."

The guy turned to her, and her heart lurched at the sight of Lyle.

"Do you need help?" he asked her.

"Yeah," she said. "Where can I find room 208?"

"We got time. I'll show you." He led her through the throng of students up the stairs and turned right, stopping in front of the door.

"Right here," he said. "Make sure you're always on time. I heard that Ms. Clark is a bit of a—"

"Were you showing Maggie to her homeroom?" Another familiar voice interrupted. Maggie turned, finding Rydelle behind them. Maggie gave her a friendly smile.

"Yeah," Lyle said. "She has Mrs. Clark. You know, the one who basically gave you a permanent detention slip last year."

She groaned. "Don't remind me." Rydelle threw her arm around Maggie, making her flinch. Rydelle pulled away, noticing her discomfort. "Oh, are you one of those who don't like to be touched?"

Maggie shook her head, hoping it was convincing enough. "It's not that I dislike it. It's more a matter of needing an advanced warning. I'm a bit jumpy."

"Noted." Rydelle chuckled. "I'll have to warn Lewis not to give you any kind of surprise hug unless he wants you to have a heart attack." She turned to Lyle. "We should get going before Mr. Johnson hands me a permanent detention slip."

"Right," Lyle said.

"We'll see you later, Maggie," Rydelle said as they walked away.

Taking a deep breath, Maggie walked into the room and approached Ms. Clark. After introducing herself, she was instructed to take a seat in the back right corner, the only seat available. Something was missing, but before she could really think about it, she heard another familiar voice, one that she'd know anywhere.

"Miss me?"

Maggie jumped as Topher appeared beside her. Instead of answering, she flashed him a smile.

"I'll take that as a yes."

Pulling out a piece of paper, she wrote a quick message. Where were you?

"I went ahead and found all your other classes so I could be your tour guide."

Right, Maggie thought, as she remembered all the other new schools she had gone to where he had done the same thing on the first day. Normally, though, he would wait until she was settled in her first room before making his temporary leave, but she guessed he was less concerned about that now when he knew she had others who could help her find where she was going.

Homeroom was brief and primarily consisted of listening to the morning announcements and taking attendance. Once it was over, she headed out.

A perk of transferring school a week after classes began was not having to worry about making a class schedule. Since there was no time for scheduling, Maggie got stuck with whatever classes were leftover that no one else wanted. Fortunately, they did take into consideration the classes she would've been enrolled in at her old school, so the classes were either the same or somewhat similar.

"Go down the middle staircase and take a left," Topher instructed.

After following Topher's directions, she made it to her history class. After introducing herself to the teacher, she took a seat in the back of the room, she took out her textbook and a notebook. Topher perched himself on top of the shelf behind her.

As she waited, Maggie tapped her pen against her desk, but after a few seconds, the girl in front of her turned around. Judging by her glare, Maggie knew the girl wasn't too happy with her.

"Do you mind?"

Maggie stopped and bit her lip under her glare. "S-sorry," she stammered. "Um, my name is Maggie. What's yours?"

The girl turned back around, and for a moment, Maggie thought the girl was giving her the cold shoulder. But, without looking at her, she finally answered, "Diana."

The teacher headed to the front of the room, signaling the start of class. But, Maggie wasn't listening to what he was saying, for Topher's voice overlapped.

"Get closer to her. Forget the others. She'll be a good friend for you."

Going to the page in her notebook that had her previous conversation with him, she wrote him a new message. But, I already have one friend who is a buzzkill. How many more do I need?

"All your friends should be buzzkills. That's how you stay safe."

She fought back the urge to poke her tongue out at him. It was too soon for her peers to see just how odd she was, she thought.

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Maggie's morning classes passed by with no real problems. Thanks to Topher, she didn't get lost and managed to survive without having to speak in front of her peers. While she didn't mind opportunities for public speaking, she didn't like when previous first days of school when she'd been forced to talk about herself in front of a room full of peers she'd never met before.

After her third period English class, she had lunch. As soon as she reached the cafeteria, Rydelle approached her. She braced herself, as if anticipating Rydelle to make some sort of physical contact as she had previously, but when she didn't, Maggie was relieved.

"Hey, Mags, why don't you come sit with us?"

"Okay, sure."

Maggie followed Rydelle over to her table. Lewis and Lyle were already seated. She sat beside Lewis and placed her lunch bag on the table. She couldn't remember the last time she ate a school lunch, and frankly, she knew she wasn't missing out on anything.

"So, are you enjoying your first day?" Lewis asked her and took a bite of his hamburger.

"It's alright," she said. "I haven't totally embarrassed myself yet, so that's a plus."

Lyle punched Lewis on the arm. Lewis shot his brother a glare before turning back to Maggie. "So, want me to show you the rest of the school once you're done eating?"

She smiled. "Sure. That would be great."

Out of the corner of her eye, Maggie noticed Topher glaring at the table. She wanted to ask him what was wrong, but she bit her lip, knowing it would have to wait until later.

Once they finished eating, Maggie followed Lewis out of the cafeteria with Topher following close behind. If Topher hadn't been there, Maggie knew her nerves would've skyrocketed. Even with him there, she felt the butterflies in her stomach just at the thought of Lewis being interested in her. She wanted to be interested in him as well, but within her was a hint of reluctance. Maybe it was Topher's reservations about the idea of her dating him. If she could just get him to relax, then maybe she could relax as well.

"The foreign language wing is down this hall to the right," Lewis said, snapping her out of her thoughts.

"Great. I have French this afternoon," she said. "Which one did you, or are you, taking?"

"I took Spanish," he said. "More like I almost failed Spanish."

"I've been there a few times," she admitted. "Well, not recently . . . when I was younger."

"Some of us just aren't cut out for this thing called 'school'," he said. "I have no interest in going to college and dealing with that expense. I just do what I have to to get out of here."

Maggie bit her lip. She herself had had doubts about whether she wanted to go to college or what she wanted to study if she got there. Then again, she also realized that her legal guardian would have to get her a loan to get into college, unless she qualified for grant money. By the time she would be ready for college, however, she might not have even had a place to live.

"Understandable," she finally said. "I don't know if I will or not to be honest."

"So, are you another C-average?"

Maggie shook her head, suddenly feeling a bit embarrassed. "Mostly A's. But, that's because I have someone who helps me study. Before they came along, I was barely passing, though."

"Well, now that you moved, are you planning to maintain your grades?"

She glanced at the floor. "I can still talk to that person, so it shouldn't be an issue."

"No one has ever pushed me to get better grades," he said. "Lyle seems to have gotten the brains. I guess that means I got the looks, right?" He winked at her, making her cheeks turn slightly pink.

"If that's what you want to believe," she said, giving him a playful smile.

Maggie glanced behind her, realizing that she no longer felt Topher's stare. As she suspected, he was no longer there.

Her anxiety grew worse, but she tried to keep it at bay. Topher was still there, she reminded herself. He might have just wanted to give her some privacy. After all, he no longer had to protect her all hours of the day.

"Alright, follow me and I'll show you the gym and auditorium next," Lewis said, slipping his hand inside hers.

Maggie's heart raced, but she managed not to give a physical reaction. She couldn't think of a time when someone of the opposite s*x last held her hand. She had vague memories of her father holding her hand when they crossed the street when she was a toddler, before the a***e started. Thoughts of her father only increased her anxiety.

As they passed through the cafeteria again, Maggie noticed Topher against the far wall. His mouth was moving, but she didn't know who he was talking to or what he was saying. For a moment, his eyes locked with hers, but then his gaze traveled to their entwined hands. Topher's expression looked like he was in pain, but he immediately turned away from her.

Her chest ached as if she could feel his pain. Why would seeing her with Lewis cause him pain? Was he upset because he couldn't have these human experiences that death had cheated him out on? Was that why he didn't like the idea of her with Lewis?

Maggie sighed. Whatever it was, she knew Topher would never tell her. Just once, she wished he would.