I Got Butterflies

     As I sit here pretending to read, hoping I can get just one look at him, at his handsome face, longing for him from afar. It’s been two weeks since the last time I’ve seen Jeff but I should back up a bit and tell you when I first met him.  I first met Jeff when he came in looking for a job, I was there that day going over things with my brother Wayne, who runs our mom’s coffee shop. When he came in, he scared me because I thought my brother had locked the door after us and he looked a little rough. I jumped up, knocked over my tea, all over my brother’s paperwork, he came to help, I jumped back from him, my brother came from the back office to see what was going on. Jeff apologized, he said he didn't mean to startle me, he was just coming in to see if we were hiring. Wayne told him that we were hiring and to come back in about an hour to do his application, he said ok and apologized once more and then left. Now you would think why would I find him handsome or be sitting here watching from across the street, trying to see him, well let me tell you why.    I was still there when Jeff came back to do his application, he had trimmed up his bread which made him look very handsome, I couldn’t believe that just trimming up a bread could change how a person looks, but it did. I must have really been looking hard at him because he said I look much better, right, I don’t scare you now. I couldn’t say anything, I just shook my head no and went to the office. And from that moment on I couldn’t open my mouth to say much to him, and even the day I made a very poor judgement call little to no words were spoken. Now it’s been a little more than a month since Jeff started working at the coffee shop, and about a week into him being there I embarrassed myself very badly, and I just can’t face him, and on top of that Wayne and I weren't on speaking terms for a week.    So  I just can’t go in there when he's there. I get so nervous around him. For the past two weeks I’ve been getting my friend Sammy to get my cranberry tea. She doesn’t mind because she gets free coffee out of it, a few times Wayne has brought me one, but after today, I’m gonna have to go get my own tea because Sammy’s moving out of town for a great job she got and Wayne is mad at me for not wanting to come into the coffee shop and help him with the new look he’s trying to do. I understand why he's mad, because I’m an Interior designer, it’s my line of work and it’s my design he's trying to pull off.  It’s not like I don’t go in after close and get some stuff done but he feels I should be there during the day when Steven the contractor comes in, he says that Steven’s tired of the back and forth and needs me to come in. So today was supposed to be the day I go and meet with Steven but as me and Sammy were coming up the street, she saw Jeff going into the shop. Was Wayne trying to set me up because he told me he was off today. I called him, he said that the other worker had a family emergency and had to leave and that Jeff was the only person who would come in. So now Wayne’s double mad at me because I’m being a big child right now over a guy, which I’m mad at my own self too for being like this, I just don’t know what it is about Jeff when I’m around him my stomach do flips I can’t speak and my body heats up. It’s a lot of feeling all at once.   Sammy’s coming with our drinks and Wayne is behind her, he looks like he’s about to blow a gasket….  Anita are you really sitting your butt out here being a big kid right now, just don’t understand why you are acting like this over a guy. This has been going on for like three weeks. So you need to tell me what happened because if he did something to you then I can just let him go. I really want to tell him what happened but I can’t, it just to embarrassing to tell your big brother, how you throw yourself on an employee, made him feel like he had to have s*x with you in order to keep his job because he turned you on so bad, you got it in your head that y’all was on the same page, that the feeling was mutual. So how do you tell your brother that he can’t ever fire him because he might come back and sue you for s****l harassment in the workplace. You don’t tell him you just tell him that you're going to come in when Steven gets here and you're just gone sit here and read until then.    I can tell Wayne wanted to make me tell him what’s up but he just threw his hands up and walked back across the street.  Girl, Nita you need to come clean and tell him what happened before this s**t backfire on you. I know I do but you think he's mad now when I tell him that he will never speak to me again. The last time you did something crazy and made him mad, he only stopped talking to you for a week, that was when you wrecked his car. I say it will only be about two week this time around. I don’t think so, maybe more like a few months or even a year. Girl really  Yes girl when he really gets mad he stays mad. (Jeff) Hey, Wayne is that your sister sitting across the street. Yeah it’s her  Why hasn’t she been in for the past few weeks. Because of you Because of me  Yeah she says you make her nervous or something like that, I don’t understand, I feel like it’s more to it. Let me ask you since she seems not to want to tell me. What happened the last time she was here and y’all close the shop. Oh man, the kissing What? What kissing? OK calm down your sister kissed me and for a minute I kissed her back but then I told her I have a girl and stuff and she ran into the office. I’m guessing she’s embarrassed about the whole thing. I can go talk to her if you want me to. No. We’ll wait until she comes in to meet with Steven and then we will straighten things out.  (Jeff)   Damn, I can’t afford to lose this job, I wish she would have let me take my foot out of my mouth. It was just my lamme way of making a joke in an awkward situation but it came out all wrong. After we were finished, we were just laying there breathing heavily, I felt like I should say something but everything that was rolling around in my head felt deep, too deep to be saying in that moment. So I tried to lighten the mood but thinking back I can see that it came out like I was saying, that she had sexually harassed me, which she kind of did but in a good way.       We had been somewhat flirting with each other on and off all day and so it wasn’t  an unwanted harassment on my part because if she knew some of the stuff that was rolling around in my head. I only let out a little of it when she showed me what she wanted to do and it was amazing, I've been wanting to do so much more, for her to be as young as she is and so shy, she got some skills. I wish I could find a way to talk to her without her brother around. I feel if he finds out the truth I’m out of a job and I might get my butt kicked for messing around with his little sister, even though she's grown, she still is younger than me. s**t, what can I do? I need this job and the other job he's trying  to hook me up with. She’s sitting right across the street if I could get a message to her before Steven gets here... Damn! Speaking of the devil.. Wayne, Steven is here Hey Jeff Hey Steven ( I don’t like him)  Hey Steven, Let me get my sister. Is she really here this time Yeah in away, she sitting outside waiting on you Did y’all get into it again Nope, not me and her this time, I’m hoping to get to the bottom of it after you and her are done talking.  Will I hope y’all work it out Me too (looking over at Jeff) (Anita) I hoped Steven would have gotten here before Sammy had to leave for work but I’m never that lucky. This is going to be very awkward on so many levels, you see Steven really doesn't need me to show him what I need him to do he just wants to be under me. Ugh I just can’t get down like that with Steven, my brother and Steven have been friends forever, his like another big brother to me. But it hasn’t stopped him from hitting on me even when he was married and his sister thinks that’s one of the reasons his wife divorced him, she even used it in court. So that on top of the Jeff issue I just can’t deal. I just have to get it over with and let the sh** hit the fan. So you actually came this time. Hey to you too, Steven. Let’s just get down to it, what do you need me to show you. I’m not understanding this wall right here, and are there going to be open shelves on this other  wall. I was about to pop him from making me come in for this but before I was about to, I saw what he was talking about that was making my design not make any sense. The drawing didn’t match up to the wall, meaning my knot head brother didn’t take the measurement right, and it won’t be a simple fix to the design.  You get what I’m saying now  Yeah I see what happened, Wayne can you come here for a minute, please Give me a sec sis I’m on the phone. Ok, but your friend here charges by the hour, so make it fast. Why you being like that Like what  Like you don’t like me I don’t like you Girl please, we were each other's first crush  Boy whoever told you that lied, I ain’t never had a crush on you. He’s saying that because he overheard you and his sister talking and you said he was cute, I keep telling him you just said he was cute not that you wanted him but he got it in his head you was crushing on him. Now that’s creepy as hell, you listening in on your little sister and her friends, you like the stalking older brother who can’t get a girlfriend, lol Man don’t play me I got mad honeys back then, hell still to this day I don’t have no problem getting me a shawty just was trying to give you a chance. Boy please, I’m good, I’ll pass Okay let’s get back to the project at hand, did y’all find out what was wrong Yes we did Mr. Boss man, you didn’t do the measurements right and because of that my design is off so now we need new measurements of the walls, so everything can measure up.  I did measure it right You think you did but you didn’t, come on Steven let’s go and re-measure everything, he might have messed up somewhere else. Whatever, just don’t forget you, me and Jeff have to talk before you leave  No we don’t it’s all good me and Jeff are cool, we homies now, so go on with your day all is good, right Jeff Yeah it’s all good Sorry not this time little sis we’re going to have that talk so take that fake crap on some where you forgot we grew up together and I can read you like a book. (Wayne)  She thinks her ass is slick but I already know what happened between her and Jeff well for the most part and believe me I wish I didn’t, I put in cameras a week before Jeff started working here. Because someone was getting in here after close, so I seen some of the same stuff was missing again and came to check the footage to see who it was and seen way more than a brother should ever see of his sister no matter her age. I had to fast forward their hour and 10 minutes of s****l activity to catch who was stealing from me. I got two shocks that day when I saw my little sis not being my sweet little sis and my ex who I love still to this day coming in to just get something to eat and take a wash up. I had forgotten I had even given her a key, but even with a drug problem I trusted her I trust that women with my life. That was the same day Antia wreck my damn car, they think I was just mad at her about the car nope that day I blow up I was mad about a lot of s**t. I just hate my little sis got the majority of my anger, so I didn’t speak to no one for a minute, I tried to find Ditra because she knew I had put in cameras.  She said goodbye and that she loved me and put the key under a box by the back door that night in the footage. It felt like my heart was breaking all over again. But back to my sis everybody thinks I’m the oldest but we kind of the same age, Anita is my sis from an affair my dad had on my mom when they got into a fight one day and he left and hooked up with Anita’s mom. One day my dad came home with Anita when we were around 3yrs old, my mom told me that she was my little sister and I had to look out for her. We were about 12 when our dad got killed trying to save a hooker he was trying to pick up from her pimp and got shot. That’s the day we heard the whole story, and Anita found out her mom had died of an overdose, but my mom loved her just like she had given birth to Anita. I took on the role as big bro and sometimes dad and I believe this is a time for another dad moment. I really don’t like being like that to her but she’s a little naive when it comes to guys and I think it’s a void of not having our dad, I know I feel at times so I know it's harder on a girl. But for the most part it hasn’t been too many times, I don’t think so anyway, that she’s fallen into something with a guy. But I really need to tell her why Steven thinks he has a chance with her, I should have done it the next day but she didn't want me to tell her what happened because she thinks it’s really bad, it’s just bad enough though that you tell your secret admirer, what you would do to him in full details and that’s why he hasn’t got over you. Hell if a chic I was into said any of the stuff she said that night I don’t think me being friends with her brother would stop me, but I guess if her bro was big like me I might be scared as well. (Mixed) Bro, I have to run we’ll talk later ok Oh. She thinks her ass is real slick but I know her game, I put the closed sign up and locked the door so she couldn’t leave. Yeah this mess coming out today, I know if I’m tired of holding my tongue, they must be going crazy inside.  Damn Wayne we don’t need to do this  Yes we do Will can you let me out  Nope everything coming out today Everything like what Ok now hold up we don’t need to go string the whole pot of worms Yes we do. I can’t keep going through all of this drama that’s not mine, my s**t is enough on its own without y’all crap invading my space.  You know what happened between me and Jeff don’t you, but how Cameras You have to be kidding me, how long have you known  The day you wrecked my car for the second time Wow that’s crazy Okay so why do we need to talk about it, you already know what happened I didn’t watch all of it I only watched the first 1 minute or so and that was to much Wow ok and why does he need to be here what drama he got with any of us here, his your friend It’s time he tells you why he’s head over heels in love with you  Really Wayne why now after all these years  Yeah bro why now  Because… You know what I’ll go first  No that’s ok I’ll go ok I’m a grown ass woman I don’t need my brother to speak for me.  (s**t I didn’t never won’t to relive that moment I had with Steven but whatever my bro wants it all out on the table, let’s put it on the table.) I took advantage of Jeff. I sexually harassed your employee. It was all on me, he was following after me so don’t be mad at him, it was just that I was embarrassed about my action and didn’t want you to fire him. Me and Steven made out and we almost had s*x that night after his sister’s 18th birthday party. So is there anything else you want me to air out from my laundry basket. Where did you get that you and Steven made out We did, Wayne I called her after y’all left to check on her and to see if we could go out on a date but she invited me over that night and we made out. You see on the phone she did sound drunk anymore so I thought she was in her right mind but as soon as I saw she wasn’t I stopped her and told her to go back in the house. Nothing happened Are you telling me that you try to take advantage of my sister while she was drunk, man what the hell is wrong with you  Calm down Wayne you wanted it out and now it’s out you can’t go trying to beat people up. I just thought he was hung up on you because of your little speech you were given when I came to pick you up not because he did a dog move on my little sis.  And speaking of me being your little sis I’m not really that much younger than him we are only two months apart we have the same dad but another woman gave birth to me but mom raised me as her own after the other lady died of an overdose. Jeff the s*x was the bomb dot com hit me up for another round, and Steven you should have been eavesdropping on me and your sis on the regular  cause you would have seen some girl on girl action a few times. Peace  Damn come unlock the door so I can get the hell out of here. Wait a minute you and my sister hooked up  Man hell no they didn’t hook up, she was trying to make a dramatic exit, for you to be so in love with my sister you don’t know her at all. Cause ain’t nothing gay about her at all Men white boy what the hell you know A lot more than you and I’ve only been here a month  Alright alright this s**t is over let me talk to my sister please, y’all dudes get the hell out, sis stay lets talk  What’s to talk about you wanted to know, well now you know. I shouldn’t have done you like that but I thought we were close then this I would have never thought you had anything like that going on. So what’s up with you, tell me why you wildin like this, hooking up with dudes you barely know, almost hooked up with Steven, and that ex fiance you had come on now, what’s really going on.  Okay look bro I’m a undercover w***e, yes your little sis is a w***e, jk jk bro you should have seen the look on your face, but for real with Steven I was thinking he not a bad dude so why not give it a shot but the next day when he called at 10 in the morning trying to take me out I wasn’t with that it at first.  Do you remember what happened cause you was so wasted at the party I could only remember bits and pieces of it and everybody else full in the gaps. I couldn’t believe I said any of that out loud, but out of everybody that was there he was the only one who checked up on my, and we did go on a date and he was a gentlemen the whole time, didn’t try anything at all but I told him it felt like I was hanging out with you I thought I had gotten through to him when he started dating his wife but I guess not. Look Anita, it’s hard to get over the first girl who stole your heart and left a mark so deep that nobody can fix What do you mean, how much of a mark did I leave on him, I was just messing with him that night Anita think about it from his point of view, the girl I’m crushing on is standing there being flirty, saying what she would do to me and how I couldn’t handle her, then I go out with her and have what I believe is the best date every, I wouldn’t have gotten over her either. Your thinking about Ditra is that why you put up the cameras I really forgot I had given her a key, this whole time she was coming into the shop and didn’t ever steal any money, everything she did on the video is the same thing that I was noticing that was out of place. Why don’t you come wait for her here so you can talk to her  She’s not coming back, that night she saw the cameras, she said goodbye and left the key under a box by the back door. It was still there when I went to check. I want to put one of these lock boxes on the wall and set the code for her birthday or the day we met or something but I don't know, I'm just breaking inside.  So you want me to be just as broken as you so you can fix me No sis no that’s not why I did that, I figure that you really like Jeff but something happened and with Steven I thought that he could see you liking someone else he would get it and move on.   Will  mama told us not to go meddling in other people's business you might not like what you find  Yes she did and I have learnt my lesson, while just a little bit Why just a little bit Because I need to know if I need to kick Jeff’s ass, I can’t be cool with him working here if he hooked up with you and he has a girlfriend, I don’t care if you did start the s**t if he got a girl he should have stop you  Will I don’t know about a girlfriend but he made a comment when we was done that was kind of rude but it was the truth at that time, but I after I got home it dawned on me that he was trying to break the silence in the room, so it was just a misunderstanding I hope I hope so, let me give you his number because he can’t come back until it’s really fixed Don’t do that he just got here don’t put his job on the line over this, that's not fair I started this And he ended it, he had a part in what y’all did Whatever,  Naw but I’m not a cruel person. I got him a job lined up either way, cause he’s really a bartender and he can make some great drinks he doesn’t need to be in no coffee shop.  Oh yeah he did say something about that  Oh you actually had a convo with him We talked over those first few days he was here, I didn’t always have my mind on his assets, you get it his assets hahaha You just not that funny, but you're going to call him, or do I need to give him your number Dang I’m going to call, you get on my nerves, you act like an old man and ain’t nothing but 27. If I’m old you are too No I act my age sweetie, you the one be at home in bed by 10 maybe 12 some nights, hahaha old ass. Let me go. I need to go re-do this lay out thank you very much. And you need to call your best friend and apologize. Apologize for what  For putting him on the spot as while and forgive him for making a dog move as you said.  Yeah you right, and once again sis I’m sorry Me too! because that was not professional at all, I shouldn't have done that with one of your employees here in your coffee shop. Why do you say my coffee shop, this is our shop no matter what and that’s it. Ok bro love you talk to you later. Alright love you too.  (Steven) Why did Wayne have to put me on the spot like that, I never wanted him to know what I almost did that night with his little sis. I regret that night so much, I wasn’t in my right mind, she had me so twisted with all that talk and the fact that some of it was things I had dreamt of doing with her, then she standing there saying it to me, it just got under my skin. So I called her that night just to talk but when she invited me over I went, and when we started making out it felt so good I didn’t want to stop, but when she said what she said I know I had to stop, I didn’t want to be put in with all them other guys she was talking about. She started saying that guys just see her body, they never really want to get to know her and if she was going to lose her virginity it might as will be a guy that’s mad crazy about her even if he sees me the same way all guys see me. It was a shot to the gut, as I like those guys she was talking about, then she said oh you thought you were different didn’t you and started laughing, that’s when I saw a few things that night. I saw that she was still drunk, that she was misunderstood, hurt and in pain. It broke me that I was just now really seeing her pain, seeing her for the first time, but before I could say anything she jumped out of the car and ran back into the house. When I got home I asked my sister about her, if she noticed how sad she was, my sister looked at me and said I guess you finally stopped looking at her beauty and looked into her soul. And that’s when my sister told me to stay away from Anita, she’s not the girl for me, that I would hurt her more than she’s already been hurt, which I didn’t listen and took Anita on a date.   I thought the date went while but she said it felt like she was hanging out with her bro, and that it was weird, us being on a date, so I tried to kiss her n she pushed me back after that I just gave up but I still wanted her I just couldn’t get her out my blood, so I rushed into a marriage that I shouldn’t have. Which just made my feeling for Anita even stronger, because she and my wife had beef, not because of me but because they dated the same dude once and my wife took him from Anita because she was having s*x and Anita wasn’t. My marriage had a lot of problems but one night she was mad because I helped Wayne move Anita into her new place, which she didn’t have to be mad because Anita wasn’t even there she had to work, it was just guys. But my ex was just going in on me talking about call them so she can see for herself, I just couldn’t take no more and blow up and  told her that she was jealous of Anita or either scare that Anita would take me from her and that she should be but not because of her but because of me and how I’ve been in love with Anita since the day I met her. At that moment I realized that she had been trying to goat me into saying it, to admit it out loud and she used it in court against me, saying I never loved her and just used her to get my business off the ground. But that was a lie Wayne gave me the money, not her dad, and he was going to lie in court I told him he didn’t want to do that, I would tell all his dirty laundry and he’ll go to jail for lying. So he told the truth and she didn’t get my business like she tried to and we have joint custody of our baby girl. My ex tries to make my life a living hell everyday, like now she texting me for no good reason I’m trying to wait for Anita to come out and offer her a ride home but I see I’m not the only one waiting I can’t believe she slept with this white boy, I wonder was that her first time since she was with her ex fiance. Damn she texting 911 it might be my baby girl, she was sick when she was born. Let me go. (Jeff) I’m glad Ms lady gave Anita my message, I think she thought I was hitting on her but she gave it to her even though our plan didn’t work. Now I’m waiting for her to come outside I’ve texted her twice but I know how her brother is he can talk, I’m kind of glad he did that little ambush, I learned a lot about her, like how she not that much younger then me, and why Steven is into her so deep, and why her brother is more like her dad, it all makes more sense to me.  But now I need to know if it’s going to be more between us, I don’t want to get my hopes up and it was just a one time thing. I see I’m not the only one waiting either but I’m not scared of him, he has been around all these years and hasn't gained her attention, why would he now, but I still I shouldn’t give him a chance to either.  Yes looks like he’s leaving, and she just texted back to give her 5 more minutes. I wouldn’t have imagined anything like this happening to me after what I’ve been through these last four years, being cheated on by my ex wife and my business partner who also stole my business off under me, my mom pass, and going broke. But coming back to Dallas felt like a new start, I fought a job within days and my boss says he may have another job doing what I’m good at. I fought my little sister and my dad, and I hope a good woman. Anita is beautiful, she’s thick and sexy but she’s more than her beauty, but I can tell guys around her get caught on just that and don’t see the beauty within, when I walked in the coffee shop that day she took my breath away, no  woman has ever made me feel like Anita. She hit me with something that day and I was trying to figure it out, and it wasn’t until that day we came together the way we did, that I figure it out, it was her innocence mixed with confidence and self control, I know your thinking what self control but she was in control even if she thinks she wasn’t, she controlled the narration of our s****l encounter the whole way through, told me not with words but with her actions, what she wanted, how she wanted it, and when she wanted it to end. I think that’s why I didn’t know what to say afterwards, I should have waited for her to say something, she was calling the shots, I just hope I didn’t mess everything up, but I also don’t want to be a rebound after her engagement which sounds like it went bad I guess that’s something I should find out about. (Anita and Jeff) I can’t believe he's still out here I said 5 minutes like 10 minutes ago, but let’s get it over with. Hey Jeff, thanks for waiting  Yeah I know how your brother likes to talk, did y’all work everything out Yeah, we’re good, we can’t be mad at each other for a long time, even when we really want to That’s good, so are we going to talk about us What about us You know what Oh that yeah we can, do you want to grab a bite to eat at the cafe Yes, I heard the food was good  You haven’t eaten here yet  Nope your brother talks about it all the time but I need to save all my money right now so no dine out for me, but it might be about to change if this other job Wayne told me about comes through Oh yeah I’m glad he helped you find something in your line of work. So if you don’t mind me asking what happened to your bar. Will long story short I trusted the wrong people that’s about it That’s to short Okay my ex wife cheated on me with my business partner and helped him take me business from me Oh wow sometimes the people that’s the closest to you are the one that hurt you the deepest. Yeah sounds like you know a little bit about that Yeah I do, is that why you moved here Moved back here yeah it’s part of it I went home first, to Chicago my mom got sick Oh sorry to hear that, your from Texas Yes, I was born in Dallas but moved when I was little, this is where my mom and dad are from but when they broke up my mom got a good job in Chicago, at first I would visit my dad but then he got married to a lady, him and my mom went to school with and that was the end of that.  Have you talked to him since you’ve been back Yeah I fought him and my little sister a few days after what happened between us, and you were the first person I wanted to tell but you wrecked your brother's car, he was so mad and you wasn’t coming around anymore. I didn’t think I would see you again, I also didn’t know that I was the other reason why you weren’t coming around, I mean I know I put my foot in my mouth but I didn’t think you were holding it against me. No I was mostly embarrassed by the way I acted and even though what you said was a joke it was the truth and it could have put my brother in a bad position, you could have filed charges against me, and on top of that I didn’t like how it made me look desperate and out of control. I beg to differ, in no way were you any of that, you were totally in control of yourself, of your sexuality and of me, and I’m sorry for ruining the moment with a very insensitive joke. I thank you for that but I should have been more professional, I sometimes forget that I’m part owner of the shop even if I can’t stand coffee, and I shouldn’t have acted so unlady like. I understand all of that but if it wasn’t for what I had said would you have even felt that way Yes I eventually would have Why It’s not how I should be acting I know how to control myself  Yes you most certainly do Will you stop that  Stop what I’m just agreeing with you. But for real all bs to the side, I do understand that you're a lady with high standards and you carry yourself as such, I know you haven’t done anything like that before, but I could tell it’s what you’ve been wanting from a partner but have never gotten. What do you mean by that I don’t think we should be in public talking about it, can we go back to your place Why can’t we talk about it in public It’s just one of those conversations you have in private  I don’t think that’s a good ideal Why is that, don’t trust yourself to be alone with me Nope I don’t I understand I feel it too, but I also want to get to know you, spend time with you I can be in control if you need me to be I’m good at fighting back my urges, if not it wouldn’t have been a week before we hooked up Oh really Yes really, and to tell you the truth you wouldn’t have gotten so carried away if it hadn’t been for some of the things I had said to you, especially that last comment. (Anita)    I looked at him for a minute and thought back to that day and realized his words were turning me on and that last comment wow just thinking about it now it’s doing something to me. It’s crazy how I’ve been around all these professional men, from football players to doctors and lawyers and in walks a laid back white bartender, ex bar owner, who’s hot as hell and he’s the guy that gave me what I’ve been waiting on for so many years. It’s sad that I gave myself to a no good dog of a man, because I was just tired of being known as the virgin around my friends. I had waited tell I was 25 to give myself to a cheating ass hole, who gave me an STD the first time we were together, he said he must of had it back when he was dating other women, like I’m stupid, I was like dude I’m a virgin not a dumbass. But I was a dumb ass because I forgave him and stayed with him for a year and a half, it took him embarrassing me in front of all his friends and a few of mine, at a party I throw for him and his team by having s*x with one of his side chicks in our bed during the party. I wanted to hurt him so bad but Sammy just pulled me out of there, but I heard Sammy’s girlfriend and my other two friends got some payback for me. But my mommy didn’t raise no fool I got my own payback in two ways, one we had two prenaps done, a dating one and one when we get married so I got my new condo, a car I can’t drive but it was his favor, and some money that I really didn’t need because our daddy took care of us in that department. The second thing that happened I had nothing to do with, it was just karma coming back to bite him in the assets, he had two kids by this girl who he had lied to, told her he wasn’t a ballplayer anymore which he really didn’t lie because he was mostly a bench warmer anyway, but she had seen our story on the football news break and sued him for child support, heard she pretty much got what I didn’t get.  So earth to Anita what we doing, are we going back to your place. Yeah let’s get the check and a dog bag  Ok cool So I paid and we drove back to my place and he was for real, he had a lot of self control which I was cool with I liked getting to know more about him. We talked for so long it was time to eat again. I cooked, he helped and after dinner we talked some more, we even kissed but he didn’t go pass that. He left around 10 that night and called me when he got home, you have thought we would’ve had anything more to say but we did. We basically fell asleep on the phone. I don’t think I’ve ever had such a deep convo with any guy let alone fell asleep on the phone together, it was nice, but I really wanted to have s*x again.  Sammy wanted me to call her and let her know how it went, and for her to be into women she really like hear about striaght people s*x, I don’t get it. I was the first person she told she was gay, I thought it was because she was into me but she was like you pretty and all but nope not my type, I could not believe who she was crushing on when she said Amanda, Steven’s sister I was girl no that’s the wrong person but they secretly dated for a little minute tell Sammy wanted to come out and Amanda finally admitted to her that she was still into guys. I didn’t think they would ever be in a good place again but after this guy hurt Amanda and we all went over to his house to save her, Sammy came alone with the gang, we kicked in his door, Sammy and I pulled her out while our brothers kicked his butt. They went to jail for the night but he went for some months for beating on her, and Sammy told her that she don’t have to be gay for her to love her she was her girl no matter what and she was worth more than that. I think they’ve hooked up a few times before Sammy got with her new girlfriend. I think Sammy and Amanda would have been great together but Sammy don’t like to share and Amanda want an open relationship were she can be with both s*x, which Sammy is the only female Amanda’s every been with. I don’t get it, so let me drop that here and leave it be. My love life is mess in of itself,  because not only do I have Steven who hasn’t gotten it yet that I don’t like him like that, but my ex fiance still be hitting me up saying he’s sorry, and he still loves me, to give him another chance that he was drunk thought he was hooking up with me. He as to be out of his mind if he thinks I would ever take him back. And after spending time with Jeff all day yesterday, having a man sit and really talk with me and not at me, and the s*x omg, I would be more than a fool. But I need to get out my thoughts because Sammy is on her way to help me track down Detra for my brother, I know this is the last thing she wanted to be doing on her last day in Dallas but she use to go with Detra’s cousin, so we’re hoping that she might know where we could find her. I hope so, Wayne has loved this girl all his life, she got hooked on painkillers after her and Wayne was hit by a drunk driver. It ended his football and her ballet careers, they both had a hard time but Wayne had me, mom and Steven, Ditra never really had anyone who believed in her. When they got the money for the accident Detra’s mom took most of it and fixed her house up, then a few months later when her mom fought out she was addicted to the painkillers she told her to get out. By the time we fought her, she had already started shooting up heroin Wayne tried to get her admitted but because they weren't married yet he didn’t have any rights, he asked her mom to come sign the papers but she didn’t show up so they let her go. I begged her to go get help but she said what for, mommy told us that she was broken inside, although she knows it’s not your fault  she’s mad at Wayne and mad at herself for being mad at him, so has much as you want to help her you can’t just let her know your here for her. It was hard for him to do but he did, he even got married but his wife and baby died in childbirth, I don’t know if bringing Detra back into his life is the right thing but I want to try and help him somehow he needs happiness his wife was a nice woman and he loved her deeply but Detra was his first love. (Detra)  My heart felt like it sunk into the pit of my stomach when I turned around and saw Wayne standing in front of me. I know he would come looking for me but I thought moving around not staying in one place for too long, would have made him give up. But for weeks I could feel something in my gut saying it was time to leave, I should have listened but no I need to work one more day here before I take off. I just can’t deal with this right now I’ve only been clean two months and seen him is making me want to have a hit, seeing him brings back the love we had but also all the pain that end my life will not my life but the one we wanted, the beautiful fairy tale life that we were suppose to have, that he gave to another woman. Hi welcome to The Chicken Hut, can I interest you in our two piece meal deal, It comes with your choice of white or dark meat, a side, a drink and a cookie. Yes I will take a two piece dark with fries and lemonade Do you not want the cookie Yes I would Will that be all No can you take a break, if so add you something on there as will No I don’t go on break for another hour or so Then I’ll wait Your going to wait to eat No I want my food now I’m just going to stay until you go on break You can go on break now Detra it’s slow, in an hour we’ll be packed Okay just go and sit, I’ll bring your food over Okay   Seeing Detra is so unreal I didn’t think I would ever see her in person again, I was mad that Anita got involved but now being able to see her I owe my sis and Sammy big time, especially Sammy I know that was hard going to see your ex that try to cut you when you break it off with them. Hi Wayne Hey I know I’m the last person you want to see I just want to talk ok Ok so talk I’m sorry about everything I did that made you feel like you had no one on your side, and for giving up so easily, I didn’t fight for us and it’s not a day goes by I don’t see how my action pushed you feather into the darkness you fought yourself in. Baby I’m so very sorry and I hope that one day you could find in your heart to accept my apology. Wow here I thought you were going to confess your love for me or something At first I was going to when I seen you on the cameras, I went looking for you  Yeah you were ahead of me, you hit like three places before me, at that last place I said I better head back out of town. Really wow that’s crazy, but yeah after a little run in with my sis, Jeff and Steven I saw that I do over step, which is what you were telling me. So as much as I would like to pick up where we left off, we’re both in a different point in our life so all I’m asking for is to start a new friendship. If that’s ok with you. I don’t know, I’m not in a good place yet to be friends with you, I’ve been so mad at you for so long and when I went in for treatment and started doing the steps, I seen why I was angry at you, and most of it you covered in your apology and the other part I just realized I was wrong to be mad at you for, I can be hurt about it but not mad. What is it, please tell me I was hurt that you went and got married and had a child with someone else, it‘s not right especially knowing what you went through, I was there, I wanted to reach out but I couldn’t At the funeral To tell the truth I was at the wedding but by accident I was with that group of people across the street saying boo to y’all when y’all was coming out and everyone was throwing rice, the group started booing because I had said damn that’s my ex.  Are you for real Yeap and it gets even crazier I was at the hospital that day your baby was born, I had overdosed and was brought in, my sister came in and told me. I was so mad, I said some really hateful things. So when I found out they didn’t make it I came to the wake and the funeral but I just couldn’t come up to you I felt so bad and to see you in all that pain, I just left. You know the crazy thing is I had a dream that night of my wife and baby which is understandable but I also dreamt about you too. That you came and put your arms around me and said everything would be ok, it scared me because you had on all white I thought you had passed, I jumped up and called your moms but a guy answer I guess he thought I was a dude after your mom but I told him I was an old friend of yours and was just trying to check on you. He told me that you were still alive but had some close calls, and he said that God was about to make a change in your life. I see he was right about that. Yeah, he was, it was him, my moms guy that helped me to start my journey to healing, he sat me down one day, he said I know you’ve had a very hard life and it saddens me to know that your mom played the biggest part in your hurt. But if you never hear it from her or no one else, you are loved by so many in the state you’re sitting in right now. And you have so many people calling and coming by to check on you, that should tell you right there that you are loved, it's time for you to love yourself. After he was done he got up grabbed his bag and left my mom, and of course she went off on me and put me out, although I was just there to visit I left her house that day and went and got help, I fell a few times but when I had my baby I had to live not only for myself but for my baby.  Oh men Ditra, you have a baby Yeah a beautiful baby boy, his with his dad’s mom right now until I’m back on my feet. But I’ve caused us both pain for my action in what was a very bad blow to both us. Just as much as I was hurting you was hurting, but I was selfish and only thought about me and for that I’m also very sorry for my part in this. So maybe, later on down the road we can become friends again. I hope so, but if you need anything, at any time before then, don’t be afraid to call me, I’m here always.    (Jeff)   Anita and I have been spending so much time together, and when we’re not we’re texting all day and night. I know it was more to her but wow this woman is enchanting, she takes my breath away. But it’s been hard trying not to be s****l with her, the s****l tension is unbearable for me at times and she really can’t handle it, everytime we hang out, she’s trying to get me in the mood. And I know it may seems crazy to hold out on the s****l activity when we’ve already done it, I just want to have a better relationship than I had with my ex wife. I’ve learned that we didn't have many of the things you need for a marriage to last especially the top 3 things. Which is trust, friendship, and support, and one more for my ex which is love. My marriage wasn’t built on any of those, which is why it didn’t last. I am doing things different this time around, I fought someone who knows what it takes to have a great relationship even if she is scared. I just have to get her to see it also, she thinks we can’t get past the s****l allure we have for each other, but I’m way past that. So I’m hoping that this date I have planned will show her what I mean and she too will see past the s****l allure. I wish she would have been my first and only wife but I probably had to go through the bad to see the good. (Anita)   Jeff’s on the way to pick me up for a date, he says he has special plans, I just hope s*x is involved in these plans. He thinks we’re soulmates but I just don’t see it, I like him and we do have a lot of fun together, I just don’t know, I just know that the s****l tension is there.  Hi Sammy  Hey girl, are you ready Almost just doing my makeup Anita just do this one thing for me What’s that Sammy Take down the wall, are just open it up and look through it to see what your missing out on What do you mean He’s not Emmanuel for starters, and when you talk to me about Jeff you have this joy in your voice that you don’t even see. I know he's not him, but I’m just not ready to get into anything serious right now, I’m in a different place in my life. You maybe in a different place in your head but in your heart, it beats a little different. Just think about it for a minute before he comes, sit and think about you and him can you do that please Ok I will Alright call me tomorrow  I will bye What does she mean? I know Jeffs is a good guy but after what Emmanuel put me though I didn’t want to get back into another relationship right now I want to be free, date around some. But then again who am I fooling Jeff is the only guy I’m talking to right now and I really like talking to him he’s different from the guys I know around here, we have good convo, his very intelligent, his not basic either and the fact that he got a GED and went to business school, and most of the guys I know went to college, own their on business, some are doctors and I know a few lawyers as will. But Jeff is amazing, we talk about everything, worldly things, art, music, politics,religion, nothing is off topic with him even if we don’t agree. I like those topics we don’t agree on the most because when we get into a debate on a topic and it gets heated it turns me on. Oh damn, we do have more than just s****l chemistry, now how did I miss that, Jeff brings out the passion in me, and in more ways than one. I don’t just have a wall up, I also have on blinders. Damn It’s crazy to be sitting here nervous, like it’s our first date or something, when you’ve been going out for a minute now and talking on the phone daily, but it is the first time being on a date with him with no blinders on and that wall now has a big whole in it. Hey baby why you so quiet, are you nervous Yeah a little Don’t be nervous, It’s just a date ok Why do I feel like it’s more to it? “You know why you feel like this” It’s all good, we’re here Wait,  Jeff you can’t afford this place Yes I can But how Don’t worry about it, just enjoy yourself How can I enjoy myself in one of the most popular upscale restaurants in Dallas, that you have to have a reservation for. I’ve only been here one time when I was with Emmanuel on a double date with another one of his team mates. I was uncomfortable that night too because his teammate brought us here because he heard me telling Emmanuel about it and knew I wanted to come, his way of hitting on me. And after we broke up, he hit my line and tried to use it as his way to get at me. But enough about the past let's focus on the here and now.  How is it going so far, did you like the restaurant  It’s amazing, and yes this time around I loved it, great food, great company, just changes the atmosphere of a place. I’m glad, are you ready for the next part Yes Okay  We went dancing at a steppers club, a walk at the park near my house, the night was so beautiful I didn’t want it to end and for the first time I just wanted to be near him no s*x was on my mind. We end the night watching a movie and falling asleep in each others arms. (Jeff) Waking up with her in my arms feels amazing, I want to get up and leave but my manhood had other plans. I don’t want to mess it up, last night was beautiful. Please don’t move, please don’t put your leg right there. I can’t take it anymore. I started by kissing her softly on her neck, then moved down to her breast, placing one in my mouth sucking ever so gently, she moaned softly. I continued kissing each of her  breasts then moved back up and kissed her lips, she woke to join me. We kissed until her body woke wanting more, demanding to be touched, caressed, and loved. I had to slow her down, I didn’t want it to be quick, I wanted time to enjoy every part of her but she snapped me out of it and said baby you have to be at work in 45 minutes, so I had to just give in to the urgency of our needs, it wasn’t what I wanted for our second go around but it was still great, maybe even a little to great, the condom broke and I don’t think she noticed, and we came at the same time. s**t not the way I wanted it to go at all. That was so amazing Jeff but why do you look like you didn’t enjoy it I did it’s just I don’t want to leave right afterward, I want to lay here with you I know and I wish you could, but we both have to go to the shop so at least we’ll still be together, and we can do it in the shower real quick Yeah real quick  He said it was all good but his acting funny, what’s really going on, I’m going to ask him when business dies down, because something on his mind.  Anita can you come here for a minute What’s up Dang that was fast  I was already heading back here Oh, what’s going on with Jeff did the date go well It was amazing Wayne but idk whats going on with him, he said that he wished we could have stayed in bed all day but I think it's something else, I’m going to ask when it dies down Make sure you do because I can’t afford all these mistakes he keeps make, in fact you stay here I’m handle the front so y’all can talk right now Ok thanks bro Hey Jeff go to the office for a minute I got the front Ok Wayne Jeff what’s going on Anita can you tell me something Sure what is it How many times have you been intimate, I know it’s only been me and your ex but how many times have you had sex I don’t want to say Why not Because it’s embarrassing to say You don’t have to be embarrassed with me Ok in all it’s like 7 no 8 times why do you want to know that Well it’s because the condom broke and you didn’t notice What it did, ok so  We need to go and get a morning after pill, because the condom broke at the same time we both came What are you saying I’m saying if you don’t want to have a baby with me you need to get that pill and take it So if I take it I won’t have a baby, I mean like what is the risk in taking the pill Wait are you playing with me HaHa yes I  am, I’m on birth control, I have the implant, so we good Oh men, why didn’t you just say that Why didn’t you think to ask that first, I got on birth control with my ex because I didn’t want kids and he didn’t like wearing condoms, so we are good in that area but I guess we should talk about kids and stuff for any future plans Yeah we do, do you want kids I do but not right away I want to get my business going well, get married, and travel a little before having kids See some of those places  you hear or read about, I want to as while Hey Jeff you have somebody here for you Who would be here for me Hello are you Jeff Reid Yes I’m Jeff Reid and you are  Can I see some identification Ok sure but what is going on Mr. Reid we had no way to get in touch with you, we tracked down your father and he informed us that you work here so we came here. I’m from child protection service, your wife is in jail and told us about you.  In jail for what, and she’s my ex wife and why is child protective service looking for me Is it some where we can talk in private I have nothing to hide, say what you need to say Ok it’s not about the adults in the room, it's about the kid in the room   Oh ok gotcha Anita do you mean Not at all Jeff, come on sweetie would you like a cookie Yes ma’am  Mr. Reid your wife tried to kill her lover which is your ex business partner She’s my ex wife has well Will I’m sorry to say she is still your wife, the papers were filed but the divorce wasn’t finalized so she’s still your legal wife, and that little girl is your daughter What are you talking about we didn’t have any kids together Your wife said that you weren't aware of the child but she had a test done and your the father not Mark Ok how do she know she’s mine if not Marks I’m guessing she had your DNA or she tested him Ok will I need a DNA done as well before I just take a child I don’t know, and why would you show up with the child before you know she really belongs to me. Because your the only person your wife trust with y’all/ her daughter she stated in this letter that you would want a test done and although she knows the child is yours there is no one else to take care of the child and the only way she can’t be yours is if Mark did something to the test. And either way she left custody to you. What happened anyway Your wife tried to kill Mark and at first they were looking at you as a suspect as well but given that you haven’t had any contact with your wife or ex business partner in like 4 years and the fact everything lead to your wife sorry ex wife, she drugged him but he pulled over to try and get help but got hit by a car when he walked into the street.   Wow so she tried to kill him, but he got hit by a car instead I don’t get it You see if he wouldn’t have got hit by the car he could have lived, there wasn't enough prison in his system to kill him right off so they could have saved him from the prison.  So how did they know she did it That’s where I come in, I’m your ex partners lawyer he thought something was going on and that she was trying to do something to him and  that maybe you were apart of it, something like  plotting to kill him and take everything, like a double backstab.  I gotcha because he and my ex wife stabbed me in the back, he thought that it was a deeper plan to take him for everything he had. Tell ya he didn’t know me at all Well I think he did a little bit because when he came to me he made a will and in it he stated that he may be wrong about his ex business partner because of his guilt and if so he wanted to leave him all his bars, night clubs and a big chunk of his money, and this apology letter. Are you for real, will I take the money and the letter but I don’t want the businesses, and if it wasn’t for the fact that I have to take care of a child now I wouldn’t even take the money. How long did she get She got 10 years with a possibility of parole after 5 years So Mr. Reid will you take custody of the young child  I wish I could say no but I don’t want any child to go into the system and I know almost all my ex wife family is either in jail, in a very bad way and no child needs to be around them. Anita is going to be so mad. Yes I’ll keep her   (Wayne) Wow today was a crazy day, I woke up to Detra knocking at my door, needing my help, then come to work and Jeff making mistakes left and right cause he thought my sis was naive and didn’t know about protection, then Jeff getting good and bad news all in one moment, crazy to find out, he’s still married, he fought out he has a daughter, he’s ex wife try to kill his ex business partner and is in jail for 10 years, on top of that his ex business partner apologize and left him a lot of money. But the good news is Jeff said that now we can get our business plan off the ground, we got this idea to make some drink shops, they’ll be like your morning, noon, and night time drinks but elevated. With Baristas in the day time and Mixologist at night, and we’re still trying to come up with a name for the noon time drinks because most of them will be non alcoholic/coffee drinks, like soda, punches, juices but with a twist. We still have a few ideas, we’re working on and even Anita big head self have throw in some ideas, like morning drinks should stop right at noon and noon drinks should stop at 6 p.m, and if we want to sell coffee all day have it set up with the baristas on one side, regular drinks in the middle and hard drinks on the other side, I like the idea but I’m not telling her I do.   But it feels good coming home and Detra is still here, seeing her in the kitchen cooking brings back so many memories, we’ve been talking on the phone since that day I showed up at her job. It's been mostly friendly so when she showed up this morning it took me by surprise, she said she needs a place to stay and that she will pay me but I told her she doesn’t have to pay me anything just save up her money, and she can stay as long as she needs to. I wish she would stay forever. (Detra)   I’m hoping coming to Wayne for help was the right move, he said if I needed him he would help but I’ve only told him I need somewhere to stay I haven’t told him the rest but it looks like he’s had a bad day. I’m glad I thought about cooking. I wish he had all the stuff to make his favorite dish but most men like steak and baked potatoes so that’s what I’m making. I guess I’ll make small talk while the potatoes are in the oven, so I can check out his mood. Wayne how was your day, you look tired It was a day I tell you What happened besides me showing up at your door early in the morning Will Jeff came in off his game missing up orders, fought out he thought Anita need to get the morning after pill What why would he think that He thought she wasn’t on any birth control and said he never saw her take any but he didn’t think about the implants ya’ll have now a days.  So what the condom broke are something  Oh I did skip that part yeah it did but it’s all good Will  sometimes s**t happens Will I hope not Why not she’s grown and Jeff seems like a good guy A good guy who just got full custody of his daughter, he didn’t know he had because his still wife tried to kill his ex business partner that she had left him for What no way what did Anita say Not much of anything, she just watched the little girl well he talked to the lawyer and child service guys. Then after that, she said she had to go meet with a client who didn’t like a chair that came in, which she was telling the truth about but it was for tomorrow at first but she told the client  she could come today. Anita’s way to avoid talking about what just went on. I do have to say this, Jeff does know my sister very well, cause he was like I’ll give her time to cool off before we talk it out. Yeah he does because we all know you don’t talk out things with Anita well she’s heated. Right, I told him two days  No not two, really he should call her later on tonight   Why you say that Because with the wife situation, a kid out of nowhere, that’s something he doesn't want running around in her head for too long. Yeah your right about that. Will at least it’s more good then bad What else happened Jeff ex business partner left him money and some businesses but he didn’t want the businesses he told the lawyer to sell them for him because he does want to go back to Las Vegas. I told him he should at least keep his bar he had but he said no at first but said I’ll keep it and give it to my ex wife so she can have income when she gets out. That’s nice of him Yeah it is, but tell me what’s on your mind I guess Jeff isn’t the only person who knows his lady That’s right, so what’s up I need to say I live here with you and at least stay here for about  6 month are so For what, are you in some kind of trouble  Oh nothing like that, I need to get my baby from his grandmother but I can’t have him at the hotel. So I came up with the idea that we rent the room upstairs from you, I put little men in daycare and… And what You give me a job until I find something else Okay, but I think you should work with my sister because I’m still a man I can only take so much if you get my draft. I understand but does she even need any help Yes she does but just to damn picky to find anyone, but she’ll love to have you and she pays more which will look better than what I can pay  How much is the pay From me right now the pay is $7.25 per hour, but Anita’s job is about $12 per hour I think, here let me give you her number, call and check it out I already have it and are you good with everything else For the most part I’m good but it’s a few things we need to talk about. Hold on this is the third time Steven has called me, his daughter has been sick. Hey Steven, what’s up? What, really I’m on my way. (Steven) Men thanks for coming to get me No problem you should have called me earlier I know but I was mad at you for the hold ambush thing Dude I thought we was good after we talked I said we were but I was still mad at that comment you made and it didn’t feel right calling you when I know I didn’t tell you the truth. Wow really dang I thought we was better than that We are, really I was just mad it was the truth what I did that night was wrong I shouldn’t know better then to hit Anita up knowing she’d been drinking. I just wanted her so bad but after everything I’ve been going through I need to get her out of my system. So what happened Will where do I start, I went to see what was going on with my little girl, she was in the hospital Yeah you told me about that Yeah and I guess you told your sister Yeah was I not suppose to, I just know they have a bond and she would want to know Oh no that was cool she called me and talked with me it made me feel better, but later me and ex wife had words and I need to talk to someone so I went to talk to Anita and Jeff was going to her building I was so mad, I drove off then I got the call saying my baby girl wasn’t getting better so I went to the hospital and my ex’s boyfriend was there, you know I can’t stand his ass, we had words but I tried to be the bigger person but he kept saying s**t under his breath. My ex actual took my side for a change and told him to wait in the waiting room he got mad and was about to hit her, bro now you know we don’t believe in hitting women, I tried broke fool down for that but they had already call security and they were trying to break us up and I ended up hitting one in the security guys in the face.  Dang dude  So I would have just stayed in jail but my baby girl need me to be out, but sitting in that jail made me come to reality, me crushing on your sis so hard has really made me miss out on some really good lady I’ve messed over in the past, you told me about at least two of them was good for me but I wanted her and still do but I need to move on, she doesn’t see me like that and I need to accept it Yeah bro I’m glad you came to your senses, my sis is cool but not that cool No dude your sis is the best friend besides you I’ve ever had and I will always have a spot in my heart for her. Yeah she’s my best friend as will besides you I really do need to get Anita out of my system, it’s just been so hard all these years being around her, my heart skips a beat every time I’m in the same room with her.  I guess I should take a break from her for a while, after I’m done with the work over at the coffee shop. Maybe putting distance between us will help, just take the time to focus on my daughter, myself, and my business, maybe then I can get her out of my system. (Anita) I’ve been sick for a few weeks, so I’m here at the doctor today to see what was going on with me, Ditra and Sammy talking about I’m pregnant. I hope they are wrong. I’m not ready to be a mom yet which is why me and Jeff haven’t really been on speaking terms. He just fought out he has a daughter and he’s still married, it’s just too much for me right now, so I can’t be pregnant on top of all that. Ugh what’s taking them so long.  Anita clam down we’ve only been in this room for 5 minutes your just nervous What will I do if I’m pregnant, which I shouldn’t be I have the implant in but what if I am Will tell me this why do you not want kids again Because I’m still trying to get my business up and running, I want to travel and be carefree and I want to be married before I start a family, I can’t do that with Jeff his already married Girl please that men is not married and you know it, that’s all paperwork and can be straightened out in no time, and y’all can travel before and after the baby comes, you just can’t be too carefree on them trips You forgot about the business Oh will you already have a good client list and have people calling you in other states so your business is booming Which will fall off if I can’t do my job for six weeks, it will really be two and a half months No it want, you got me I can do the heavy stuff or we can get Jeff and Wayne to help you can do it, and my wedding gift/baby present can be free babysitting so y’all can take a honeymoon  You over her planning a honeymoon and me and Jeff not even talking right now  His talking your just not listening Hello sorry about the way, the labs took longer to come back. I need you to lay back on the table so I can do an exam Is everything alright I just need to check something, just relax. Ok you can sit up What’s wrong  Ok Anita it seems that your IUD came out and you're pregnant, I know this is something you're not ready for but you are pregnant. A few things need to be done right now we need to make sure the IUD is not still inside you, and have moved somewhere else we also need to make sure the baby is in the right place What do you mean in the right place We need to make sure this is not an ectopic pregnancy And if it is one what will happen Let’s just find out first, the sonogram tech will be here tomorrow will you be able to come back, she’s here until 12 noon Yes I can come back what time I’ll fit you in at 11:45 to see her and then we’ll go over what to do next, ok Okay thx  Your welcome and Anita it’s going to be ok no matter what, call me later today and we’ll talk Ok I’ll will, we do need to catch up on things Yes we do (Jeff) It’s been weeks since I’ve talked to Anita face to face, she was at least picking up the phone at first now nothing, not even text. Wayne said to give her some space but I have a bad feeling that if I give her too much she’s going to move on and I can’t take that, my heart hurts right now and we just had a disagreement but if it’s over I don’t know what I’ll do. So I’m flying out to Vegas to sign papers and check on the bar. I wanted her to go with me but I guess it will be the space she needs but when I get back we fixing what my pass has came and messed up. I can’t believe Megan did this and tried to put a child on me, I’m going to see her too and let her know that I’ll take care of her child until she gets out but after that I don’t want to hear from her again. It’s crazy how much it hurts me to know that this pretty little girl is not mine or Mark’s meaning she was playing both of us, yeah I had them to run Mark and my DNA just to be on the safe side.   Getting off this plane brings back so many memories, not all of them bad, being here for two days is to long but when I’m done I’ll have more than a million dollars in the bank and as much as I wanted to sell everything he left me I couldn’t I kept the bar I started up so I can give it to Megan’s daughter that way Megan can’t sell it, and two of the night club wasn’t full mines to sell so that’s another reason I had to come and meet with the owners and the lawyers to work out a new deal with them.  Hey Bob Hey Jeff the club owners are in the conference room, here’s the contract Wow, I know Mark was into something but this contract are highway robber Yes they are so what are you looking to get out of it. The guy from Club Rock said Hey I’m not Mark, I want to see if you want to buy me out of the deal, so I had both place appraised and this is what they say your businesses are worth, if you both can give me half of these amounts the business is your, out right you’ll be full owners of your clubs  You have to be joking, the guy from Club ShayShay said  Are you for real, his brother add Yes I’m for real, I don’t want no part of the Vegas business scene, when I leave here I only want to come back as a guest not a businessman unless my new business spreads out this far and even then I might just let my friend work this end. Ok so what do you guys want to do, do you want to take the deal, Bob said I came with more than his asking for so I'm in. And I came with about $150,000 less than you're asking. Tell you what you take my bag and his and call it even its only short $40,000 and when you do come back for a vacation, we’ll comp you a few stays equaling the remaining balance, how is that.the guy from Club Rock Jeff you do you say, Bob asked. I’m good with that but what about him, do you want him to owe you. I’m good with owing him, he’ll get his money with the high interest he charges  I won’t charge you interest if you get it back in a week ok Ok gotcha, then I’m in  Ok everyone just sign these papers and everything will be final, Bob said. If felt like I was in a deal with the mob or something, I couldn’t even take a plane back to Dallas. I had to drive because of the two bags full of money. As soon as I got back my dad told me to go to the hospital because Anita has been there since I left.  Why didn’t anyone call me, I hope she’s alright, the crazy thing is my dad said it was Steven who came by to tell me. He said that Anita didn’t want me to know but why wouldn’t she want me to know she’s hurt, does she not love me anymore, or does she think I don’t love her. I’m going to find out today one way or another. (Anita) This last week has been hell on me, first I find out I’m pregnant, than I find out that they have to go in to get the IUD out because it moved, which is how I was able to get pregnant, and then when I get the nerves to go talk to Jeff his gone to Vegas. So now I’m here in the hospital going through all this without the father of my child, never thought I’d be a baby mama. Will I pray I’ll be a mommy because there is a chance I could have a miscarriage, as much as I wasn’t ready to have a child, I really don’t want to loss one, abortion didn’t even cross my mine as I was sitting there that day after I fought out. I was going over the fact that I wasn’t married, did I have enough money to take care of a baby, will I be a good mom like my mom, will me and Jeff be able to co parent, not once did I think to get an abortion. And before I could get too happy about becoming a mom I’m scared that I might not get to see my baby, I’ve been crying off and on for days praying that my baby makes it through this procedure. Jeff was supposed to be gone for only two days to take care of some paperwork at the lawyer’s office but didn’t say nothing about getting a divorce from his jail bird wife, but it doesn’t matter if he does or doesn’t,  it’s over between us, which will be the first thing I tell him when I see him. Miss you have a visitor who’s not on the list, is it ok for him to come in What do you mean is it okay for me to come in Anita what’s going on It’s okay you can let him in Baby what’s going on why are you in the hospital what happen Slow down Jeff can I get a word in OK Ok  Jeff I’m pregnant but they have to go in and remove the IUD because it moved out of place which is how I became pregnant, there are risks involved with removing it. I was due to have it removed but I got sick and they have to do it sooner. So when are they doing it and what are the risks I’m getting it done in the morning, the risks or miscarriage, problems with the pregnancy, to name a few, wait, here's the papers you can read them. Jeff sat down to read the papers, holding back tears, I watched him as he read those words that feel like a knife stabbing you in the gut, it so many risks not only with the procedure to remove the IUD but the issues the baby is facing, all them birth affects the baby may have. Now I’m in a ball of tears remembering what I read, Jeff came and put his arms around me and I cried like I have never cried before, I was wrapped in my own crying I didn’t notice he was crying too. Wayne walked in and seen Jeff was there, he was mad at him Where the hell have you been Wayne you know where I was, why didn’t you call me I did call you You didn’t call me I have now missed calls from you, then again I was driving back so I could have been in a dead zone but I have no voicemail are nothing Will I didn’t leave a voicemail Wanye why wouldn’t you leave a message I don’t know I was upset wasn’t thinking straight, so why did you end up driving back I was done with everything in one day and I couldn’t get on a plane with two bags full of money so I drove back, before I could get out the car my dad told me to come here How do your dad know Steven came by and told him What why would he do that I asked him to go see if he was back and just not picking up the phone Why would you think I wouldn’t pick up for you we don’t have any beef we boys, so I thought We are but when it comes to her she comes first no matter what, and seeing my sister in so much pain scared me to death I couldn’t even move, luckily Ditra was there Baby are you in pain now  Nope I got something for pain Why are they not doing it today, what are they waiting on Was going to get it today but the nurses didn’t have the right information and let me have breakfast Oh it has to be done on an empty stomach Yes, but Jeff we need to talk, Wayne  Say no more I’ll be back in the morning ok Ok Baby can I go first please because after you hear what I have to say some of what you have to say may change How you know what I have to say may change it may not I pray it does, just hear me out Ok go on I sorry I wasn’t here when you needed me the most but I had to go take care of all that unfinished business I didn’t know I had. So first thing is I’m officially divorced, I’m not the father of that little innocent child and it turns out Mark wasn’t either What! are you for real  100% for real, I went and told her to her face too and she already know I wasn’t so she says, but she wasn’t for sure, I told her I will keep her only if my fiance was cool with it, and give how kind she is it won’t be a problem but don’t make it no habit because if we have to get her again we will keep her. What finace You baby I talking about you, Anita will you marry me, I know we haven’t been together long but I love you with all my heart and I want to be all of your P’s as you say, Your partner in love, Your protector from harm, Your provider in every aspect of your life, Your prescription when you're sick, Your patience when you can't find any, Your prayer partner when you get down on your knees and ask God for blessings or to thank him for the ones you already have. I want to be all of that and more, Anita will you marry me. I don’t know what to say,  Jeff it’s too soon don’t you think, I need some time, let’s just see what happens with the baby first ok Anita please don’t say no but I will give you time to think it’s not like I planned this and have a ring or anything But you do have a ring Nope I don’t I was just going to put this old thing on your finger Jeff stop playing I was going to say  I’ve had it for about two weeks, it was the first thing I bought when the first wave of money hit my account, the next thing will be that dream house we were talking about, baby I’m saying this I’m all in just let me know what you want. This may be crazy but I want you I’m all in too. Visiting hours are now over please say your goodbyes thank you What did you say I didn’t hear that You hear me I said yes I will marry you Yes baby I love you I love you too.