Dear Somebody

Chapter Six

    "I'm so sorry Harley," Clara says carrying Casey in her arms. "DJ walked off when we went to the bathroom and just recognized Dalton. I didn't know what to do."

    Poor Clara looks so stressed and worn down I don't have it in me to be mad, "It's okay Clara, just take Casey inside and relax. DJ you go to, we'll talk about you running off later."

    I use my no nonsense voice so he knows I mean business, he hangs his head as he walks to the back door. 

    Four men stand blocking our paths, all with arms crossed and visibly shaking.

    "You shouldn't be here asshole." Ace calls out.

    I rest a hand on his shoulder, "It's okay stud."

    "No it's not Harley, he shouldn't be anywhere near here."

    I give him a sad smile, "I know he hurt you too Stud, but it's not his fault he didn't know about DJ. No matter what I feel for him we can't keep them apart if they don't want to be."

    He plays with my fingers on his shoulder, "What about you?"

    "I don't really matter in this case, besides I have you guys."

    They all turn to me and nod before making their way inside, Ace taking a few seconds longer to throw Dalton a death glare.

    I cross my arms over my chest and watch as the door slides shut behind them. Even though were outside it feels like everything is closing in on me, like I can't f*****g breath.

    Until I look at him.

    Then all the air comes crashing back to my body, I get light headed.

    Dalton leans against his dodge with his cowboy boot covered feet crossed in front of him. His open blue flannel shows a white undershirt and still rippling muscle.

    I walk to the front deck and take a seat on the bottom step, "So you're a Cowboys now?"

    He shoots me an all too familiar smile that knocks the wind back out of me, "Among other things."

    "That's good."

    "So he's mine?"

    I stare off into the tree line behind him and nod my head, "Yeah, names Dalton Ace Core JR. I switched out your middle name for Ace's but yeah he's yours. I tried calling and writing but nobody seemed to know where you were and if they did they weren't spilling."

    Before I can say anymore there's a loud thunk as Dalton falls to his ass, I pose to go to him but stop when he holds up a hand. His head rests between his knees and I can see him taking deep breaths.

    "I'm fine just a mini panic attack."

    "I really did try to tell you Dalton, I just couldn't find you."

    "I believe you Harley."

    He lifts his eyes and emerald green meets mine, they look as if they've aged a thousand years, if not more.

    I see it then, he wants to ask something but doesn't think he should. Doesn't think he deserves it, just like he didn't think he deserved me.

    "I wont keep you from each other Dalton, I haven't changed that much. You're his father and if he chooses to want to get to know you I wont keep that from either of you. It might be rocky at first, but I won't stand in the way."

    "Thank you," There's a pause.

    Then, "Who was the little girl?"

    I smile, "Her names Casey, I had her with my late husband."

    I can see the pain flash across his eyes and I want to relish in that, but I can't. No matter how much I want to hate this man that shattered me, I just can't. I know even if I will never admit it again, that I have always belonged to him.

    I shouldn't explain but I do anyway, "About a year after having DJ I went out with Jackie and met Casey at a bar. He was drunk off his ass, just found out that morning that he was dying from terminal cancer. He had no family and no friends he really cared for. Wanted to pay me to have his babies."

    I laugh and lift the rings from around my neck, dragging them back and forth across the silver chain.

    "I left him a napkin with my name and number and told him to call me the next day when he sobered up. He did, we were married a year later and I had Casey three days after he passed."

    "You loved him?"

    I meet his eyes, again wishing I could break him like he did me. "Yes, but not like I did you. I knew that heartache was coming, it's harder when it's from someone you never thought had it in them. I knew Casey was going to die, there was nothing I could do but make his lasts moments the best we ever had. He wanted to adopt DJ so he could leave something for him in the will, but I wouldn't let him. DJ is mine and yours, no matter how much I hate you."

    "I never meant for any of this Harley."

    "We never do Dalton, but yet here we are. Did you find what you were looking for? Was it worth it?"

    He doesn't answer right away, "I find a way out of the darkness yeah."

    "You weren't the only one in there Dalton, and guess what? The guys turned out fine. Because we stuck together, we got each other through it, just like we could have done for you. But no. You had to go and do s**t on your own because your a big burly asshole SEAL who thinks his life is his own."

    I can see the smile he's trying to hide, "I see you grew a spine while I was away."

    "No I dropped my filter when I decided I wasn't going to let anyone walk all over me again." I stand from my spot and cross my arms, "You can come by tomorrow after we get settled in and I'll introduce you to DJ, but I'll only say this one time. I may still love you but I don't like you or trust you."

    He nods, "I'll be here."

    I watch as he gets back in his truck and pulls on a baseball cap before backing out of the driveway before I make my way back inside. Ace stands across from the front door, big arms crossed and face as brooding as ever.

    I smooth the creases between his brows with my thumb and feel his body relax, "It's what's best Stud."

    "I don't trust him."   

    "Then trust me Ace. I may not be good in the love department and I might end up an old cat lady, but I know what's best for my kids."

    He lets out a breath that fans my face, "I'm pissed off at him but I also missed him like f*****g crazy."

    I give him a sad smile, "That's okay Ace. You guys were friends before serving and we both know why he left you behind, why he left all of you. I think in some weird way he knew I wouldn't survive without any of you."

    "I'm still pissed at him."

    I laugh, "I wouldn't expect anything less, but also know this. I wouldn't be upset at all if you guys became friends again Ace."

    He scuffs and I pull his face so we connect eyes, "I am as serious as I can ever be Ace. You and Dalton are meant to be friends and I have to believe that all of this was meant to happen. If he never left I wouldn't have Casey and I can't let myself regret that for even a fraction of a second."

    It's true. Even if God himself presented me with a rewind button on a silver platter I wouldn't take it. I needed to marry my ex-husband and have Casey, this was all meant to happen.

    I can't allow myself to think otherwise.