Voices in the Night

My hearts beats like a humming bird’s wings inside my chest. Tonight is the full moon and beginning of the mating season and I’ve finally become of age to join and see if my mate is among our pack. It’s not unusual to find a mate from another pack, but for generations no one has had this happen. Finding your mate at a young age is ideal, I quickly remind myself, but somethings are worth the wait. My mother stands behind me at my vanity desk, playing with different styles for my hair. She’s just as giddy as I am about this night. Other than the Luna and Alpha, any mated pack members are not allowed to join. An exclusive event for those without mates. Mom keeps reminding me to not make a spectacle of myself, to remain calm if I see my mate, and to hold my head up if I don’t. She loves to remind me that it took two whole years before she and my father found each other. Age means very little in our world, a world of mythical monsters and beings with extraordinary abilities. “Remember, it’s not about physical attraction, although it helps, but the bond between you and your mate.” Mom reminds me, her hands working magic with my unruly red hair. Under her guidance I feel amazing, powerful, beautiful even. I feel deserving of everything she’s ever told me I deserve; and it’s a lot. “I know, Mom. Believe me, I know.” I respond in a playful tone but annoyed tone. She grips my hair tighter, a jolt of pain lacing through my head before relaxing her grip. “Hey, don’t use that tone with me, missy.” She says sternly, but the laughter in her eyes tell me that she’s playing with me. Within seconds we are both laughing. I believe her; I believe every word she has ever spoken to me about my future mate, about how happy I will be, and what a wonderful and love filled life we will have. Im not looking for a prince to whisk me away, or some gallant knight to rescue me, while it would be a wonderful story, I don’t need that kind of life. I want what my parents have; the sneaky lustful glanced over dinner after a hard days work, to be able to relax in the same room without a word and just bask in the loving glow of each other’s company. I’m a girl of simple wants, and simple needs. I’m even working under Mom and Aunt Linda to become a cosmologist. I’m not looking for an Alpha or even a beta to mate with, unlike some girls I know. I want a humble life with a loving mate to share my everything with. “Mom, you and Dad didn’t meet at a social gathering, right?” I ask, looking in the mirror at my mother. She’s a beautiful woman, and her wolf is stunning. Contrasted to her lovely red hair, Mom’s wolf is snow white. A trait passed down from mother to daughter on her side of the family. “Oh heavens no, I wouldn’t have been caught dead at those in my youth. Honey, these gatherings are like they were in the past.” She responds, keeping her focus on my hair. “You see, alphas use to use the gatherings as a way to mate off their warriors to unattached females. Things were desperate in those days. Our packs were thinning out, and not many children were being born. To ensure our survival the alphas decided to gather the available women and the strongest males together in hopes of being our numbers back up.” Her words intriguing me. I hadn’t heard this story before. Well, may in a pack mandated history lesson, but who honestly pays attention to those? “Did it work?” “Hmm? Oh, yes, but not for the reason they thought. What really happened was the females were finally able to mingle with other packs and found their mates. With more wolves than ever finding their Moon given mates, the number or babies born increased, and overall pack moral rose in great numbers. Alliances were formed and the social gathering became a tradition.” “Whoa, I didn’t realize things got so desperate back then.” Mom nods her head in agreement. “And you, my dear, are ready for your first event.” She announces proudly. Looking myself over in the mirror with little but flattering make up, and a wonderful half up half down with pearls strung through my hair. It almost looks like she got me ready for my wedding, and in a way she is. If I find my mate tonight a ceremony won’t be far behind. Smiling happily I stand from the desk and quickly hug my mother. “Thank you, Mom! I feel so beautiful!” I exclaim holding her tightly. She hugs me back with the same level of enthusiasm. She wants this night to go well for me. Exiting the black chauffeured Nissan Altima, I thank the driver before shutting the door closed. Feeling a fluttering in my stomach I move carefully to the event. The gravel beneath my feet shifts leaving me feel a little unsteady in the high heels Mom picked out for me. Mom went all out for this night, springing for a floor length jet back evening gown with a slit to my hip with a sweetheart neckline and off the shoulder quarter sleeves. My neck is left bare of any jewelry or accessory but teardrop pearl earrings dangle from my ear lobes. Class and elegance being the main theme for my overall look, something I believe my mother helped me pull off gracefully. Putting all my reservations about tonight behind me, I enter the venue with a feeling of awe. Coming from a humble background and family life the ritz and glamor of the ballroom and patio leaves me breathless. Looking around at the many people in the venue already, I try to find someone familiar, someone I know from school. Soon enough I find someone I know. Picking my way through the crowd of people, I make eye contact with a close friend from school. “Victoria,” I call out within a few feet of her. Victoria graduated high school the year before me. We’d been close in high school, but lost contact when she started college. “Raine,” she greets back, her face lighting up with relief. She quickly meets me with a tight hug. “I’m so w you’re here too.” I tell her when we part. I see she had a flute of what looks like champagne in her hand. Her nails are well manicured and I wonder briefly if she did it specifically for this event. “Me too!” She responds just as happily. Falling into a comfortable vibe, you ask, “Is this your first event?” She shakes her head. “No, second, but there’s no shame. Last year was a low turn out with the dispute with the June Moon pack.” You nod, taking a champagne flute from a server walking by. As a werewolf I have a high tolerance for normal alcohol, and even though I’m not 21 yet, I still am allowed to drink at pack social events since 18. “I heard this year we have non-pack members joining.” Some protested the event this year because of the rumor. Personally, after hearing the story Mom told before coming, I believe it’s for the best to have outside packs join. The larger the number of participants, the better chances everyone has to find their moon chosen mate. Victoria nods her head. “The mid winter event had been canceled because of the pandemic, so they decided to bring everyone together at this one to make up for it. This year’s even is much bigger than last year.” Ah, I sometime forget that a majority of the world is still battling with the pandemic. As wolves, it is unlikely for us to get sick like a normal human, but this virus even affected wolves. It was a surprise and hard blow for the werewolf community to follow human guidelines to stop the spread and protect the pack members most at risk. Looking around I see a few people scattered here and there in the crowd wearing upscale masks. It’s odd to see them, but not uncommon. Still, you respect their choices as it is still taking lives. “Do you smell that?” Victoria asks out of the blue. Her left hand rests on my forearm as she looks around the room for the origin of the smell. I shake my head, not smelling what she is. “No. Is it good?” I ask, following her motions and look around. Looking directly into my eyes she says, “It’s wonderful!” “Well, could it be your mate? I heard some say you’ll know when they’re near by.” I tell her, watching her head snap to her right, as if zeroing in on the source of the smell. “My mate?” She whispers, excitement filling her eyes. “I’ll be back.” She whispers absently before leaving my side. Quickly I wish her luck, and I’m happy for her, but now I feel alone, like a fish out of water. Feeling more than a little self conscious in my was too fancy dress, I take to wandering around the ballroom, making my way to the patio for fresh air. Stepping through the door my heart rate spikes suddenly. Cautiously I look around the immediate area, but see nothing that would cause me alarm. Everyone is mingling and walking without sparing me anything more than a glance. Shaking off sudden feeling I continue onto the patio. The cold air feels refreshing on my hot skin. I stay on the patio for awhile to enjoy the evening and admire the stars and moon. I feel stronger, happier even under the moonlight, but I suppose I’m not the first to feel this way. Taking a deep breath into my lungs, I smell something suddenly. Perking up I look around while taking more deep breaths. I feel my wolf shift inside me. Her nose high in the air, sniffing the air. “Mate?” As casually as I can, I walk through the crowd smelling the air as my lead. I have to find the location of this smell, I have to know if this is my mate. Scanning the groups of wolves, I catch a glimpse of Victoria with, who I assume, is her mate. The pair seeming to be talking intently in their own little world. Quickly your attention is back on the scent. As gracefully as I can, I weave my way through the crowd, the smell getting stronger with each step I take. I feel anticipation building in my chest as I get closer and closer. I can taste his scent it’s so strong! Within seconds of breaking pass a small group chatting, I come to the source of the scent. “Mate!” Without thought my eyes find him standing next to a large window, his head snapping to my direction. Happiness blossoms from my chest, coursing through my veins. He meets me half way, our eyes mapping each other’s face. I smile up at him, wanting nothing more than to touch him and make him real. “Mate.” She jumps up and down in joy. “Hi.” I whisper softly. He doesn’t respond. Instead he looks around the room before saying, “Follow me.” Before I can respond he’s weaving through the crowd, leaving me to trail after him. His pace is fast, as if to put distance between us. The thought makes my heart ache. “No, he’s just nervous.” My wolf says, trying to convince the both of us as he leads me outside and away from the crowd. He looks around before turning to look at me again. Anticipation runs through my veins once again as he steps closer to me. He stops barely an arms length away. My heart feels like it’s going to burst from my chest. “Listen,” he begins, his eyes darting away from mine. My heart drops with that one word. “I’m sure you’re nice and all that. But, well, you’re not my type.” “What?” I ask. I’m sure I didn’t just hear my mate say I’m not his type. “Don’t you feel the pull? You’re my mate.” He shakes his head. “It’s not that I don’t, but you look nothing like the woman I deserve.” His words are like knives in my heart. “But, I’m supposed to be the most beautiful woman to you.” Somewhere in my head I feel something snap. I feel desperate for him to take back his callous words. He looks away from me, his hand rubbing the back of his neck. “I mean, you’re pretty, but I want the wow factor. So, sorry, but I, Preston Woods, reject you as my mate and sever our bond.” The moment those words left his mouth I went numb. I stare into his eyes, praying to the goddess he’s joking, but all I see is coldness. Tears bubble from my eyes. “Please, tell me this is a joke. Please,” I plead reaching out to him. I need him to be joking, my wolf needs him to be joking. He catches my wrist, stopping me just short of his shirt. He can’t look me in the eye anymore. “I’m not joking. I don’t want you.” He bites out at me, angry suddenly. To prove his point he throws my hand down. Hot tears steak down my face, finally breaking free. I want to speak, to tell him he’s wrong, to plead for him to stay, but nothing leave my lips. His eyes never reach mine and for a second I saw a softness to his eyes as if he felt guilty, but no sooner did I see it, it was gone. “Have a good life.” He says coldly, then walks away from me, back towards the party. I feel it the instant walked away, the tether between us pulls taunt, painfully pulling at my heart with each step he takes. I feel empty inside, as if my heart had been stolen right out of my chest. My knees buckle but I remain standing. I don’t know how long I remained in shock, but Preston’s scent hit me once again. Turing quickly hope blossoms that he came back to apologize and ask my forgiveness. Instead, I see him locking lips with a leggy blonde that matches his height. Anger quickly heats my cold body, before realizing Preston is looking right at me as he kisses the woman. Whatever hope or plead I had to save our bond is quickly broken with the realizations he’s doing this to solidify his rejection. Fresh tears quickly race down my face as I turn and run away from Preston and his callousness and the dreams I held so dear to my heart. I ran until I couldn’t run in the heels, then ran some more after abandoning my shoes. Every ounce of me and my wolf demands I go back, to try and make this work; still, I can’t bring myself to turn around. I know, logically and instinctually, that if I go back, he’ll only hurt me more. He’s rejected me without getting to know me. He doesn’t want me. Twenty minutes later I find myself home. The lights out and house locked up. Walking lifeless my to the front door I push in my PIN number and the deadbolt slides out of place. Holding back my sniffles and sobs, I close the door and slink to my room. I’m glad my parents are sleeping. I don’t want them to see me like this, to know I’m a failure as a mate, that I’m not good enough for my mate to love me. Biting my lips together because of my own thought, I make it to my room without waking my parents and slip inside. I lock the door, then close the curtains. I don’t feel beautiful or worthy of the moon’s glow anymore. Slipping out of the dress I clear my face of make up and take my hair down, gingerly putting everything in a neat row on my vanity. I doubt I’ll look at pearls the same way again. With eerie calmness I slide into a nightgown with cartoonish hearts and stars and spaghetti straps, before laying down in my bed. Covering myself with my blanket I try to fall asleep. I’m exhausted and broken hearted and in the morning my parents will know the truth. I know he won’t tell anyone that I’m his mate, and neither will I. There is shame in both rejecting a mate, and being the mate that was rejected. Rolling to face the wall anew rush of pain hits me in the chest. The pain steals my breath away over and over again. I thought Preston’s rejection was the most painful experience in my life, but it pales in comparison to this. With each new wave of pain and breathlessness, I begin to beg for death. Anything would be better than this pain. Maybe I am dying. It’s not unheard of, maybe this is what it feels like to die of a broken mating bond. No, dying wouldn’t be so bad at this point. It beats knowing my mate rejected me for not being a goddess, that he couldn’t look past his dream ideal and see me as a person. Death would be more merciful than Preston was.