Estoico

Alone on the pavement all i can think about was nothing, the beauty in nothingness and how peaceful the feel of nothingness is. Its really annoying most times that i cant feel a thing but not feeling a thing is what wakes me up every single day. "Your life is worthless" they said "your only good for pleasing others" they said "no one most know" they said to me "don't let anyone in" they said "this is your mantra for life b***h , and you better keep to each one of them" they said to me I will never forget any cause i can still remember how it got inscribed into me like it was yesterday i can still feel the hard cold floor against my strained back and the red liquid that embraced me like a blanket and their burning yet mocking stares at my naked life less body. "Lizzy, why are out here alone you should go in its getting cold out" my mom says to me as she embraces me and engulfs me in her heart warming love, that i still cant feel but i do understand what it is for but i am too numb to let the warmth sink in "Lizzy my child are you alright?" " i am okay mom" i say to her, "you know you can talk to me right?" i nod, if only you know mama, if only you know