I became so numb , I avoided dad's house because I didn't want to see him. Or by chance of seeing him , I became a homebody. I went to school and work and came home. I studied and I slept and ate and showered everything I should be doing. But still, mum looked at me, worriedly. Tina tried to talk to me , but I didn't want to talk. I wanted to be gone from here. I kicked myself daily for even letting my guard down in the first place and letting him in.
I should have stuck to the original plan , and that was operation f**k off. I couldn't stop the dreams though , or nightmares dependent on how you looked at the matter. But he kept me awake , his eyes , the memory of his touch. Funny how these only kick started once I knew it was officially over. Not when we were stuck in the limbo stage.
