Distant Lover

Re-connect

Alicia was almost back to her normal self, she could smile genuinely and feel lighted it’s been 4 months though. The pain that she gone through is manageable nowadays. She don’t feel sad often even in her alone time unlike before that even her friends are around she become emotional and tears will just fall down. A friend of her asked her of her Skype account and added her as contacts. Alicia doesn’t open her account on that site for a long time, almost half a year because of that incident. She thought it will be alright to open it since they don’t talk anymore and he had no reason to message her at all. She log on to Skype and the first thing that caught her attention was the message of Royi and hesitant to open it because the feeling that she have for him might resurface and she doesn’t want to get hurt again. But again, her curious mind won’t allow her not to open it, she read that Royi wants to talk to her, he’s asking for forgiveness and if I am willing to give him a second chance. The message was 2 months ago. Alicia did not reply, don’t know what to do with that but one thing is for sure to her that it was the best for the both of them that they should stop their relationship. For now, it was enough if ever, if God really want us to be together it will, nothing will stop that if its God will. I just want to enjoy my life with my family, friends and nurture my hobbies. In the first place, God has a reason why it does happen, I don’t understand that but I was still thankful. I have a lot of time, I know myself better and I learned so much with that breakup. It was a great experience knowing him, I don’t regret a thing. The bad thing about me is I can’t stop myself from thinking to reply from his message, I do reply but I don’t know if he will read it since he don’t open it for a month now. I reinstall my w******p and he also message me there. I saw his last seen it was yesterday, I tried to ignore his message but can’t stop myself from replying. I said that, I think it will be better if we could just be friends like before. I don’t regret anything knowing you and having a relationship with you. If God will allow us to be together that would be great but if not, I think He had a better plan for the both of us. Let’s face it, we had hurt each other back then. I am better nowadays and I realized during the time I have no contact to you is I want to be better, to know myself, to improve, to travel and explore the things that I fear. I don’t want to regret anything from this life, including you. I don’t want to be bug of not trying to contact you. I don’t want you to be my biggest regret in this life. I still have feelings for you but for the mean time I want to be with myself and hoping that you will do the same. If ever, you found someone that you love I will be happy for you though it may hurt me but this is my decision this time. Let’s make every day counts, be happy and let things flow. I still love you but I don’t want this love kill us together.