The Darkness Within Us

7. A Dream

“Salomé, hija (daughter) what happened? Why are you on the floor? I heard a thud, are you okay?” I just stared blankly at him. “Hija, speak to me!” He shook me by the shoulders.

“T-the...” That was the only thing I could articulate, and not daring to look, I raised my shaky hand pointing at the hall. Dad looked quickly over his shoulder and closed the door.

“Was it harassing you?” he said, still holding me by the shoulders, knitting his exuberant brows in the center. I nodded. “Was it only one?” I nodded again. He nested me in his chest and caressed my back and my head until my heart slowed down again. I hugged his robust figure until his warmth made me feel capable of standing on my feet again. Then dad did the same thing that he and mom did when I was little, he covered my eyes with his hands and led me to my room. Once there, I put myself together and assured him that I’m okay/will be okay. Then, just like a child, my dad tucked me into my bed and kissed my forehead. “For anything, whatever, just call me.”

“Si, papa” Even from the door, I could see his worried expression.

“I love you, my little one.”

“I love you pa”

When dad was gone, it was pretty obvious that there was no possible way I could sleep, so I decided to take some sleep aid pills. And incredibly, they worked. I fell into slumber in no time. All about the state of unconsciousness of my body felt all right, I was wrapped by darkness and I didn’t mind at all until this darkness became cold… and then I was standing in the darkness and I could see nothing, nothing but shadows. I could vaguely differ. I knew it then, I was there.

My body was sleeping comfortably in my bed but, my spirit had traveled to a dark place where only shadows and unliving spirits inhabit (I guess this is what some call astral projection but in a limbo with phantoms tho); yet another undesired ability that I was born with and that my little brother shows no signs of possessing, fortunately. And also, one of the reasons I avoided bedtime as much as possible when I was little—I was simply standing still, with a chill sensation in my skin, and seeing almost nothing, but enough. I started to walk; it was better than simply standing there like a lamppost. Maybe walking would mean nothing, but at least psychologically, it made me think the time would go faster. The shadows just ignored me as I passed by, but some fear rose from me, thinking that maybe taking a sleep aid wasn’t the wisest choice when I had a possibly ill-intentioned spirit harassing me, because it existed a chance of it of trying to steal my body while my soul is out… It’s quite a horrible and risky ability if you ask me, but I do not do this, it just happens occasionally without me being able to control it; which is why my mom got me this bracelet that possesses some sort of special blessing conjured that protects me, preventing ill spirits from hurt me or attempting to possess my body. I know I should have felt safe then, but I couldn’t help feeling anxious, and as worry and trepidation crept onto my system, the shadows there became each time more aware of my presence.

I had to stop and take a deep breath; I was calling way too much-unwanted attention. Usually, when I visit… “here”, the spirits and shadows ignore me, either because they are minding their own afterlife business, or because they think I am one of them. With time, I came to notice that, as I also noticed that strong emotions, like desperation or fear, make me noticeable. The less scared I am, the less I have to walk among unsettling stares. I decided to close my eyes and calm down, thinking that nothing would happen to my body. Honestly, (and strangely), I somehow prefer to be unconscious, and here, then suddenly open my eyes and find that horrible spirit stalking me in my sleep. Just the thought gave me the creeps. And that one definitely was an ill spirit. I could feel it, I could… sense it. I need to make sure to see Dakota as soon as possible.

Before I could notice, it was as if I was not in that place anymore, and I could feel my bed under me too. There was something that I don’t know how to explain but it made me open my eyes. I was in my bed lying on my side comfortably but then I saw something really weird: Valentin… am I dreaming about him right now? A confusing feeling took place in my heart, giving me some kind of unease and anticipation. Why?... Why is he here? Valentin was sleeping unperturbably by my side; it was something unbelievable. Damn, he looked beautiful, even asleep, so comfy and calm, I even felt envious. Valentin was sleeping on his back, with his right arm behind his head and his left hand resting on his abdomen. There was something about his hand that called my attention. There was a faint golden glow at the base of his ring finger, wrapping it. It looked like a ring but it wasn’t, it was more like a tattoo or a mark that resembled a ring. I looked back at Valentin’s face; he opened his eyes, startling me. He turned to the side and placed a strand of hair behind my ear that I didn’t know was in the middle.

“Valentin?” I felt his eyes travel to my body and then stationed his eyes right in mine as if he was looking through me. “Salomé?” I think I heard his voice faintly, although I wasn’t even sure if he moved his mouth. He was looking at me with those intense green eyes of his that I could swear were glowing in vivid green. That look was breathtaking… alluring… My heart thudded against my ribs as I felt out of oxygen. I dropped to my back, placing my arm on my forehead, trying to convince myself that it was not real, just a dream. And then I looked back.

Suddenly, I was not in bed anymore, and Valentin was not in front of me either. I was in the woods but in the same darkness as before (because there’s a twisted version of this world in that place, but darker; and I don’t always see it though). I felt some sort of breath in my nape, one that made all the little hairs rise on my skin to rise up. I slightly turned my head to the side to see, but I regretted it instantly not daring to turn my head completely to see what was behind me. And then I just did what my body ordered. I started to run. An incomprehensible fear grew in my chest as I felt whatever was behind me chasing me. I ran as I had never before but couldn’t leave it behind. Finally, tired of so much running, I fell to the ground, giving up. I was doomed. That very moment, I opened my eyes and my body sat up quickly as a lever. The indelicate movement made my head hurt instantly. I was panting and covered in sweat. The nightlights were off and the light went through the curtains. “What time is it?” I reached for my phone to check the time and when I did, all the sleepiness abandoned my body instantly. Holy s**t, it’s incredibly late! I jumped from the bed like lightning and ran to the door. I tripped and fell down to the floor as my body was not fully awake yet, but I got up quickly and ran to Jesús’ room.

“Jesús!” I yelled as I entered. He was not there. “Jesús!” I ran downstairs, nearly tripping, but he was not there either. Instead, I found dad sitting in the living room. “Pa?”

“Good morning love. I’m sorry I didn’t call you earlier. I heard your alarm but you were still asleep. I didn’t want to wake you up because you looked tired. I was about to wake you up.

“I see.” At least it was a relief that dad took Jesús and would give me a ride so, I wasn’t gonna arrive so late after all. I ran to the shower, put on the first thing I found, and got into dad’s car. I ate my sandwich as we rode.

“How did you sleep, love?” he asked.

“Fine… thank you. What about you?”

“Fine. I scolded Jesús for the light thing.”

“Dad, you shouldn’t have to…”

“Yes, that’s one of his only duties.”

“I know… I just don’t want to scare him; you know how insightful he is.”

“I know…”

After arriving just a little later than usual. I fought to not die from sleepiness every second of the class until it was over. After class, I went to the library where I clearly fell asleep. I was tired… just why did it have to be such an eventful night? First, the horrible phantom, then “the other side” and running all night in my dreams! With how much I hate running and I could swear I was running for real... And what did that dream I had had of Valentin mean? I wondered as I felt the need to stretch my bones quite urgently. I stretched my legs to the front, hooked my fingers, taking my hands into the air, and then I threw my back and my head backward, all the way down to stretch my spine nicely. That felt amazing. I opened my eyes, seeing everything upside-down and a masculine silhouette walking on the ceiling a few meters in front of me.

“Salomé?”

“Valentin?” It was Valentin. I tried to compose myself quickly but I ended up losing balance and making the wheels of the chair throw me backward. I squeaked as I was unable to hold onto the desk, waiting for my inevitable and humiliating fall that never came. Valentin launched, trapping me in the air and preventing the back of the chair from touching the floor. He slid the wheels, took the chair and me to the original position, and then took a step to the side.

“Are you okay?” huff!

“Yes. Thanks, you saved my life, though.” I said, sighing, I technically saw myself on the floor.

“I don’t know if your life, but... I saved you. And your pride too, I guess.” I couldn’t help laughing, this guy always had such occurrences.

“You really think you’re funny, huh?” The corner of his mouth quirked up and he shrugged.

“Yet, you’re laughing.” Yes… “Mind if I sit?” He said, pointing to the chair in front of him.

“No, no. You know…” He put his backpack on the desk and plopped on the chair. I put a messy strand of hair behind my earing-less ear. I must look horrible today. My hair looks trashy, my face looks thrashy, and I looked horrible in general. I literally put on whatever I found. A big sweater, big pants, I look so… not feminine. I didn’t even have time to put on some makeup to cover my cadaveric face. Not wearing earrings feels almost like being naked to me.

“So, we’re finally done with the essay thing, huh?” I was too distracted thinking about how I looked that it took me a second to process the question.

“Um? Oh, yes. Ya lo que fue, fue.”

“Sorry?” Oh my, of course, he didn’t understand.

“It means: What it was, it was. It means that everything is already done and we can’t do any more than wait.”

“Makes sense.” I was suddenly remembering that dream I had with Valentin, especially the part when I met his eyes. I was looking at them right now. They were an intense shade of olive green with slight yellowish and brownish lodes over his irises. It was such a wonderful gaze. Now that I think of it, Valentin is the only person with green eyes I know. And now that I think of it, I’ve been staring Valentin right in the eye, in silence, for way too long. I tore my eyes from Valentin, looking aimlessly at the window. The cherry blossoms are starting to bloom.

“So… Salomé”

“Yes?” I looked at Valentin but then my phone rang in my hand. It was my dad. I stood up, gathering my things. “Oh sorry, I’m going home now. Did you want to say something?”

“Nothing really,” he said, resting his arms in front of his chest.

“Okay then, see you tomorrow.” He smiled, waving a hand in the air.

I jumped into dad’s car and we got home listening to some music. We stopped by Dakota’s house and dad waited outside. I entered through the small door of the garage that was not being used as a garage but as a*****e. When I entered, the sound of a bell greeted me and I saw a live video of myself on a screen hanging from the wall.

They had many sorts of things in here, from food to ordinary supplies, and even a shelf full of ornaments. Handmade indigenous ornaments. The little wooden totems were crafted by Dakota’s own hands. My hands flew to a pair of new pieces, two little wolves. There was one smaller than the other and both of them had a crescent moon carved on their foreheads. I reached out for the big wolf, provoking another bell to ring in a different tone. It was a sensor system my dad installed for Dakota a couple of years ago.

“Do you like it?” A voice called from the back.

“Oh my, Dakota!” I turned quickly to see her standing behind the counter.

“Salomé, how are you?” She gave me a wide smile when she heard my voice. “You can keep it if you like it.”

“Oh no, I was just seeing it.”

“Okay… But it’s okay if you want to keep it.” I thought about it for a second and then I decided to keep it. I walked to the counter to greet Dakota.

“How are you doing, Dakota?” The older woman with long black and grey hair smiled.

“I’m fine, thank you.”

“How are Jeanna and Ed?” Dakota’s daughter and husband.

“Jeanna is doing fine, she was here last weekend, and Ed is running some errands right now. How is your family?”

“They are fine as always.”

“Glad to hear that… Tell me, honey, what brings you here?”

After telling Dakota the reason for my visit, she came home with us and strolled around with a dried corsage of agrimony and asphodel and heaven knows what other kind of plant. She recited some sort of prayer while she spread the smoke around the house. It was a ritual supposed to repel spirits, especially ill-intentioned ones. Dakota has been doing this for us since I can remember.

“Thank you very much, Dakota, I’m sorry to bother you.”

“You know you have me to help you dear. And any excuse to leave home is a good one.” She smiled. “But… If you really want to thank me you can always offer me some of that good coffee you make.”

“Right away!” I went to the kitchen to prepare some coffee and sit with her at the table.

“Would you like me to read the Amethysts for you?”

“Did you bring them?”

“Of course!” She smiled, patting her bag. Dakota took out a pouch, put a piece of black fabric on the table, and then she placed the amethysts on it, forming a line carefully. “Very well darling, you know what to do.” I looked at the amethysts and then reached for the first one that my eye caught. I took the amethyst and handed it to Dakota; She groped it a little and then she spoke again. “This means… darkness…” I felt something knotting in my stomach. I took the next one and she did the same process. “This means…” her face darkened. “This means danger Salomé…” Oh My… Finally, although as reluctant as willing to reveal what else was there, I reached for the last one. “This one is… hmm…” the last one was taking her more time than usual, which worried me. “I don’t know.” She spat simply.

“You don’t know!?” I said, raising my voice.