THE MOON'S DESIRE

Screams echoed in my head, twisting and turning on the couch, and then my eyes opened like I’d been sparked back to life. Just a dream. I sat up straight, my back pressed against the couch, and touched my face with shaky fingertips. Sweat drenched me. I reached for the pills on the table in front of my knees and popped one into my mouth. Bitter, but I’m used to it, quite fitting for my state. Nightmares have been a constant ever since I stabbed my own father. I got up, feeling slightly better, and headed to the bathroom to look at myself in the half-broken mirror. The look in his grey eyes, his face full of disbelief. “You are and will always be a weakling,” he said through gritted teeth, each word strained with pain. That bloody scene keeps replaying in my head like a broken record. The disbelief in his eyes. He hated me because I wasn’t a boy. He wanted a son to carry his legacy. I came instead, and he didn’t hide his displeasure. How can someone hate their own blood? Mother couldn’t conceive another child. If she tried, it could kill her. They tried everything, but it was all for nothing. Father was the Alpha of the Luna Pack. Why was? Because he was ruthless, a tyrant. Our people challenged his rule, and we were banned from the land. He couldn’t even provide a son for the seat, and yet he treated everyone cruelly. Out of anger and pain, a commoner tried to kill him as we were leaving. Mother saw it and stood in his way, they shoved silver metal into her. She died. That day, a coward like me killed the man I once called father. No more cries. No more regrets. Pain is relative to me. I feel numb. Every time guilt tries to surface, it twists into a creepy smile across my face. It’s eaten me up like a disease. I looked away from the mirror, refusing to meet the demonic reflection of what I’ve become. I couldn’t stare too long. I ran from the shelter into the forest. Limbs cracking and twisting, claws digging into the soft earth, I felt alive. On all fours, I plunged into the woods, senses sharpened, hunger and instinct driving me. The forest welcomed me with shadows that clung to my fur, cool and damp. Branches scraped against me, leaves slapped my face, but it felt freeing. The world had narrowed to smell, sound, and motion. Every scent, every rustle, every heartbeat was alive. A fox darted past, cautious. I followed, silent, body moving faster than it should, twisting around tree trunks, leaping over roots. I was aware of every muscle, every tendon, every twitch. I was awake in a way I hadn’t been in years. The moon slipped through clouds, the Moon Goddess was always watching. Her presence wrapped around me, cold and powerful. My reflection in a puddle made me pause, sharp cheekbones, eyes glinting like shards of metal, fangs bared in a predator’s grin. For a heartbeat, I almost stared, almost met the demon I had become. But I looked away and ran, carrying her gaze with me. The deeper I went, the quieter the forest became. Even the wind seemed to hold its breath. I could hear my own pulse, my ragged breaths, the scuttle of small creatures around me. Predators or prey, it didn’t matter. I was a force in that world now, moving as if it had been waiting for me all along. Branches tore at my fur, and a scratch on my flank bled. I barely noticed. Pain was distant. Hunger and adrenaline were closer. I crouched, sniffing the air, listening. Somewhere close, a rabbit froze, sensing me. My grin widened , sharp and feral. I was no longer the weakling he called me. Not here, not in this wild. The Moon Goddess watched, and alive meant dangerous. I was rogue now. Banned, unwanted, forbidden, untethered. No alpha, no pack, no leash. The forest was my home, but it was also my cage. Every shadow could hide a threat, every sound could be a hunter. I had nothing left but my instincts and my fury. I ran further into the darkness, every step a declaration. I was alive. I was forbidden. And I was free.