The Sweetest Thing

Staring up at the ceiling fan, watching the blades spin. I'm in a haze of smoke, floating on a cloud of relaxed euphoria. This room is still unfamiliar but at least its safe and warm. I have a roof over my head and a mattress to sleep on. Beats the park benches and bus stops. Jess, my ex, moved here after we broke up twelve months ago. When I got out, she made the trip back home and we ended up locked in a room for three days making up for lost time. After she left, we stayed in contact with regular phone calls. I lived with my mum and twin brother Adrian then but after another drunken brawl with Ady, Mum kicked me out. He has always been her favourite. Weird considering we are identical twins. How can she have a favourite? I suppose he has always been the smarter one. More relaxed and easy going. I'm the serial f**k up. The one who makes dumb decisions and is ruled by brooding anger. Drinking and smoking, experimenting with drugs and getting in with the wrong crowds. The black sheep of the family.  After Mum kicked me out I started making my way down here, I'm not really sure why. I guess it just seemed like a good idea to get as far away from my problems as I could. I didn't have any money aside from what I got from the dole. Not enough to thrive on but just enough to stop me from starving to death, I guess. I caught a bus most of the way down but had to hitchhike for a few days, which also meant a few nights of sleeping under the stars. The temperature got so low that  I would wake up covered in a thin layer of frost. Thankfully my puffer jacket kept me warm enough to get a few hours of sleep in before the shivering got too much to bear, forcing me to get up and run a lap of the block in order to raise my body temperature. When I got here I rang Jess since she was the only person I knew in this town and part of the reason I'm here. She was surprised but not unhappy to hear from me. She lived with her cousin, Sammy and Sammy's boyfriend, Kennedy, and their two kids. They let me stay for a bit before I walked in on Jess f*****g another bloke. We hadn't put a label on our relationship but I assumed after spending every night together for the last couple of weeks, we were exclusive. Guess I assumed wrong.