My Triplet Lovers

Who I Really Am (Trevor's POV)

Even if I was panicking, I was still determined to go through with this!

I know she'll be worth the effort to put all my confidence into for today!

After all that pep talk I went through in my head, I decided to choose where to sit. I chose to sit right beside Maya like what Travis did earlier just across from him too because other than not hearing my voice, I wanted to try to get comfortable around her again by being near her, I'll get used to her again in no time and I don't want to look like I'm always scared and shy just hiding behind my brothers all the time.

Phase 1 was complete, now for phase 2, actually saying something to her.

All this time I've been preparing myself to handle all of this in my head, I never thought of one question to ask her or even what to say to her now that I had a chance to do it.

I didn't need to worry though because soon enough, Travis started with asking her first. That was a relief for me because my thoughts were completely blank when I had to think of something to say.

I let Travis and Maya do all the talking first while I listened and start to think of anything to say to her that may or may not be related to their topic at the moment.

I chose to observe what they started with and I can see Travis continued the little joke we had as kids where the three of us pretend to be each other or change places to see whether our friends or family would notice if we weren't who we were, if that made sense. Right now, Travis pretended to be me acting all shy, good old days... I miss when we did this...

It was always fun to do before, even if I was the shy one between the three of us, it was fun to pretend to be like them because I gained a bit more confidence pretending to be them because I knew exactly how they acted around others.

It was easier to be like them than to be me because I had no clue how to be me.

I wanted to be fun like them because everyone loved being around them while in my case, They only see me as a really shy kid so they approach me all shy as well but with Troy and Travis, it goes smoothly for them like even just a pat on the back or just by waving at them, they could already start hanging out while it was a long and awkward process when it came to me.

I did try to be like me without making the others uncomfortable and just be more friendly around them but they always mistake me either as Troy or Travis because I didn't “act” like me or act like the way they were used to seeing me.

I was since then labeled the “shy” one because they never saw me as outgoing like my other brothers. Since then, I got used to that label and became what they see me as and nothing more than that.

Although my brothers at least know that I'm a neverending chatterbox when it's just us. I at least can be my true self around them, I hope I can be me around her too so I'll be trying my hardest to show who I really am around her and not just see me as the quiet triplet in her eyes too on our first meeting.

But before I get into all that, when did I start being the quiet one? I know it's not just about that one time where I was treated as the quiet one, others see us all equally back then... what changed all that? I decided to think long and hard while Maya and Travis were probably still talking.

Pretty sure neither of those two were the reason nor my family since they still treat me like the chatterbox I am and never stop talking to me once I opened my mouth.

I gotta focus now, what happened to me?

Well, me and Travis were always with our grandparents. I mean, we lived with them and grew up in their place, a little far away from this place where Troy and Nathan grew up. Could that be the reason why?

Nah, it couldn't be. We always acted the same plus we visit here often except for school days of course.

So if that wasn't the reason, then what was the reason I started talking less?

I got back to thinking since they were still busy with the whole joke thing.

Seems too long for a joke to take but I won't get in their business since I'm busy with mine.

A few more minutes back into thinking then it hit me!

I'm always a chatterbox in our place where we live with grandad and grandma and even in this house too but there's a slight difference in between.

In our grandparents place, the people there treat me like how they treat Troy and Travis, all equally and for sure they'd never think of me being shy because I could really show myself to them for some reason whether inside or outside the house while here, well I am who I am around my family, basically the people in this house but once I take a step outside to play and have a little chat with the others, it feels different...

I guess I just never got used to this place... more specifically, outside...

Sure we visit often but when we do, we barely go outside since we play all sorts of games inside with Troy, Nathan, and Travis. Occasionally, with our aunts, uncles, and cousins too.

I guess that's why I never got used to the place outside...

I mean sure, Travis never went outside since we were always all playing inside whenever we visit here but I guess he's just a natural, adapting to places easily.

Welp, I got my answer to that so I guess I'll get back to trying to start up a conversation with Maya or continue whatever she and Travis were talking about. Pretty sure I can start hanging out with them since I've figured myself out right in time while she's here and while we have the time to talk and get to know a little bit more about her. But wait- have I even thought of anything to say to her? to them? I guess not...

With all that thinking, I lost track so I decided to watch them again.

Good, not much time has passed but wait-

Did the atmosphere change? Like it got a little bit awkward in here...

but wait... I never said a word yet?

It was still Maya and Travis talking?

What happened while I was gone?

Ohhhhh it's still about the little joke Travis pulled on her earlier-

I can see she looked worried thinking she made a mistake and I could tell just from the atmosphere here, all my mind could say was...

“Ooh, that didn't go well-”