Chapter Two: Missing You.
2051 Words
Levi just stared at him dumbfounded for a few minutes, he still couldn't believe he had actually said that to him.
"Miss me...? How could you miss me...? You're the one who left." Levi mumbled under his breath as he stared down at his desk, he hated that he was actually feeling sympathy for him once more.
That horrible excuse of a human being didn't deserve it, yet he got it.
Valor sighed, seeing he had mentally and emotionally messed him up a bit. "Because I do... And I wasn't the one who decided to marry a minor, babe." He got a little bit defensive, knowing this would just make his ex husband worse but it was worth it to see his reaction.
Levi went silent, his teeth gritting against each other as he clenched his fists. He hated that he brought that up, Valor was the one who lied about his age and it wasn't like they did anything passed kissing.
And Valor always initiated everything in their relationship, no matter what.
"You were the one who lied about your age! It wasn't my fault! When will you ever stop blaming me!?!" Levi lost his cool once again, it was like Valor's mere presence was cause him to act like this. He was fine when he was gone from his life, why was this happening to him now?
Valor seemed to enjoy that he was getting under his ex husband's skin, smirking at the thought of it. He knew he had him under control, this was hilarious to him.
"Oh, dear... I wouldn't yell like that at me, if I were you... I wouldn't want to tell your boss how rude you're being to a new company member." He said in a baby voice, being so condescending it almost made Levi want to commit a murder. He breathed for a second then stepped back, he couldn't act like this while he had this job.
He went back to his compliance, which put a grin on his ex husband's face.
"There, that's a good boy... Go back to being a doll for that boss of yours, you were always good at that..." The condescendingness was too much, Levi had to change the subject or he would either cry or kill the man in front of him.
The man would deserve it if he did though, he was testing his nerves on purpose.
"You should be working another day that is not the day you were hired, you may leave now if you wish." Levi acted all professional, trying to hide how upset he was right now with everything that was happening. Valor was getting under his skin again, he couldn't allow this to go on.
"I don't want to leave just yet... I wish to talk to my ex dearest love, to see how he's been doing nowadays without my help." Valor started to tease instead, it was less frustrating but still got under Levi's skin. He wanted this to be over with already, why was God torturing him like this?
"I've been doing fine. No thanks to you for ruining part of my life..." Levi shrugged, just giving into his ex husband's delusion of thinking they were anywhere near good terms right now. He should know well by now that they were nowhere close to that, after what he did to him for those two years.
"Ah, I see... Still salty about what I did, huh...? You sure do hold a grudge." The slight sympathy in Valor's voice was misleading for Levi, he knew he was just trying to manipulate him again. But why did he have to be so terribly charming on top of all those bad things?
Wait, what was he thinking? He hadn't had feelings for him in a long time, and he was sure not going to start them now. He pushed them down into oblivion, refusing to believe those were any more than intrusive thoughts that just wanted to harm him.
"Well, now that you've intruded into my life... You may leave, once again." He continued his professional stance, hoping it would finally make Valor give up and go home. Or at least leave him alone by going to another room, he wanted his peace away from him.
"And once again, I don't want to leave when you're here... I was planning on doing this then going home to forget about it until the day I needed to work, but you... You being here changed my mind." He hated how he acted like he loved him even though Levi knew better, he wanted him to just admit he loved toying with him then go away.
He wanted him to go away. So he could go back to being free.
Kyle was no help at all, staying in his office most of the time no matter how much yelling he heard from outside of it. Levi knew he was good for nothing, but this was taking it to the next level. He was his boss, he had to have at least some care to what happened to him.
"Why don't you just go home...? We'll never work out, get over it..." Levi was firm with this belief and comment, not stuttering or looking down at the desk. He wanted Valor to know there was no second chance left, for him to move on and go away.
Valor's smile dropped, his face looking all sad from the comment now as he looked down.
Uh oh.
Levi had broke him from his flirty and condescending behavior, was he really this powerful?
He needed to be careful with this new found power of his, it could hurt someone.
"I... really am sorry, for what I did... I was an idiotic child who couldn't think straight, I only saw everyone else as my toys... Including you." He looked up once again, a frown still on his face where a smile used to be. "I know, it's terrible... But I was fifteen, I had no idea what I was doing. I'm sorry for hurting you, physically and emotionally. You didn't deserve to be treated like that."
This was new, Valor had never apologized to anyone about anything before. Had Levi really broken him into whatever madness this was.
"You don't have to forgive me or even acknowledge I apologized for that matter, I do wish you would... But I just wanted you to know that I am sorry. You deserved so much more than what you got from me." This had to be some kind of scheme from him, Valor would never say such things from his mouth. Maybe it's from a script?
Levi stared at him for five minutes or so, trying to process again, what his ex husband had really said.
The man who was incapable of apologizing, actually apologized to him.
"I... I..." Levi stuttered on his words, no longer acting professional or rude with him and just being silent now. How was he supposed to respond? He wasn't even sure if it had really happened, or if it was just another figment of his imagination. Just like how freedom was, when Valor showed up.
"You don't have to say anything, it's a lot to throw on you... I know. I'm the worst person on this God forsaken earth. I deserve every insult you throw at me, as I understand why you hate me for everything. I would've done it to myself if I had gone through what you had gone through with me." This had to be a script. It just had to be. There was no way he would profess something like this, not that man.
"You're... just trying to manipulate me, right?" Levi was still trying to be under the impression that Valor was lying to him, that he hadn't really changed, that this was all just a scheme to get Levi back under Valor's thumb.
Normal schemes he knew that man would come up with.
"No, I really do mean it like I said it... I'm sorry for everything, I was a real jerk in the past.. and a child. I hope that it didn't make it so things would be bad between us during work, also your boss is kind of a sleaze ball, isn't he?" He was apologizing while making conversation, this really was Valor talking and not some script he was reading off of.
Levi had finally gotten the long awaited apology he had been hoping for years for, why would it happen on a completely normal day like today though?
No, this wasn't anything special. Levi was sure of it. Yes, Valor was genuinely sorry for what trouble he had caused. But at any minute, he could snap and become like he was in the past again.
He could become the man he once feared again, and that terrified Levi to his core. He didn't want that again, he didn't want more memories to bottle up like the others he had in the back of his mind.
"I won't go back to doing that again. Not ever again. I refuse to be horrible like that again, especially not to you. You deserve better than that." Valor explained, hoping to calm his ex husband down. He really was sorry, it was so strange.
"I... I'm sorry, I don't know what to say to that... You've never apologized for anything in your life.... Did I do something wrong?" He gave a fake worried look, trying to see if there was something Valor was hiding from him. Perhaps if he was lying about really being sorry to him, because he was sure that was not in his character or personality.
"No, I just really mean it... I'm sorry. I hope we can maybe... start over some day? Obviously, not right now while we're still acquaintances... But start over, sometime? I will make it up to you, I swear.." Valor really seemed desperate at this point due to Levi's questioning, it was clear he was not lying. Levi accepted his apology, but he was still wary of his presence.
"I'll think about it, okay...?" Levi asked, hoping to get a good answer from Valor. He got a slight nod as Valor stared out the window, still watching the birds float in the air.
"I wasn't trying to get under your skin when I said I missed you, by the way. I really did miss you. I'm sorry for abandoning you and leaving you to suffer because of what I did." Valor said once again, how much he missed Levi. Levi didn't understand or trust one bit of it, but what choice did he have right now? He had no evidence that he was lying, it could even convince him.
He was hiding nothing, it wasn't fair. He had gotten better, he had moved on. He had gotten everything he wanted again, he hated him even more for it. Yet he envied him so much.
He could never move on, he just couldn't. Not with the memories in the back of his head telling him how much had happened, the pain he feels every time he sees his memories, and the thoughts that come along with it.
The thoughts, the thoughts were the worst of all. They told him how and why to end it, how it would finally make Valor happy with him. The thoughts were the scariest.
"Hey..." Valor grabbed his hand so suddenly, looking into his dark green eyes with his blue ones. "You'll get through this. I will help undo the mess I created. It's the least I could do for ruining your life like that, I really didn't mean to."
The hand holding was slightly catching Levi off guard, but it got him out of his trance.
"I... I can't get through it. I can't be fixed from this. I'm broken, don't you understand?" Levi was on the verge of tears as he looked away from him, trying to ignore everything right now.
"You can be fixed... I'm sorry I made you think that way. I will fix everything. I promise." Valor squeezed his hand, hoping to calm his former husband down as he wiped the single tear from his cheek.
He really had changed, even if it was impossible.
- Writer
