Devil,Devil
830 Words
I jumped up from my sleep as I saw a bad dream.I saw Alan stabbed me in my stomach and slit my throat.No one can understand how dangerous of a person he is at night.
Living with a serial killer,under the same roof,in a same room? There was no guarantee that he wouldn't kill me.I got off the bed to check where Alan was because he wasn't in the room.I walked outside and saw Alan sitting on the couch with his hand buried in his hair.I watched him from far apart but couldn't help the feeling of rushing into his arms and saying,"I love you"
He looked like an innocent human being who needed help.
I sat beside him and touched his hair.He looked at me with blood,red eyes.
''Go to sleep,Stacey.It's late.'' He said as he laid back on the couch.
"What happened?'' I asked him.
''Nothing. You go sleep.'' He insisted.
''I will,but did you sleep?'' I asked.
''Don't worry I will.'' He said.He smiled at me,trying to hide the tension on his face.
I stared at him looking for an answer.
"Go to sleep,will you? It's late." He said.
"Come with me." I said as I forwarded my hand.He looked at my hand then at me.
"I am not sleepy.Can't you go to sleep?" He said as he narrowed his eyes.
"What is it? Tell me." I asked as I sat beside him and touched his bare body.
"It's nothing." He smiled at me.I rolled my eyes and let out a deep sigh before leaving.
"I am coming." He said from the back but I paid no attention to him.I laid down on the bed and covered my mostly bare body with the duvet.
After a few minutes,Alan came and laid beside me.I was turning my back at him so he hugged me from the back.
"Will you tell me what is it?" I asked.
"It's nothing,baby girl." He replied.
"I am not talking to you unless you say what's bothering you." I said.
"Baby, it's just old habits.Nothing more, trust me." He said as he pulled me to face him but I stayed strong and didn't turn to him.
"You won't turn around?" He asked very softly.According to his strong body,he could turn me to him without even using a bit of his strength.I was totally defenceless in front of him yet he let his emotions get the best of him.That's why I loved him so much.
"Okay, fine don't turn around then.Are you okay ?" He asked.This time his voice was more gentle and softer which completely melted me, conquered me.
I turned around to face him and kissed him on his soft,warm lips.I broke it off soon but he hugged me tighter,closer to his chest.
I pulled my hand from him roughly but he grabbed onto them tighter.
He came closer to my face and made me look into his eyes.He placed a gentle kiss on my forehead and pressed his lips against mine.
"You're only mine." He exclaimed.I moaned when he kissed me.
I looked into his cold, gruesome eyes,the eyes which knew blood and pain,the eyes which knew violence and ferocity,the eyes which knew domination and jealousy but those were the same eyes which had the deepest love for me.
"If you want to go...then go." He whispered looking directly into my eyes.His eyes had no emotions,no pain,no tears,nothing.
He did whatever he liked, whenever he liked.He never asked me what I wanted, about my feelings.
This is my last and only chance to let him go,to move on completely.To have a life every normal person does.To wake up in a warm bed with a gentleman,but it was also true that I can never wake up beside a gentleman because no matter how gentle he is or how genuine his love is,his bed can never make me feel warm.Why?
Because he is not Alan.
"Do you want to let me go?" I said as I took a deep breath.
"I don't want to control you anymore.I want you to be happy.You deserve to be with a man who will love you whole heartedly,a man who will make you feel safe and warm in his embrace,a man who will never hurt you no matter what the circumstance is." He said.
"And that man is you..." I said as I kissed him.No matter how much I hated him,I can never deny the fact that I loved him and whatever happens,I will not be able to live without him just like he cannot live without me.
"I want you to make a clear decision.Take your time and-"
"Shut up!" I said as I put my index finger on his lips and I snuggled under his neck.He held my hand and kissed my fingers.
"Sleep now,will you?" He said as he pulled me closer and held me tight in his embrace.
"You are holding me too tightly." I joked.
"Oh sorry...did I hurt you?" He said as his face turned into a frown.
"No you didn't." I replied.
It wasn't just him.I was also excessive.I overreacted in many situations and I hurt Alan a million times too.We both were guilty.
At least we both were together.
- Writer
