Ya Amar (My Moon)

Seven

In the garden, I was greeted by the fragrance of flowers. In between the violas, the fragrance that wafted in the air was incredible spreading a certain peace I never had to my mind. Whenever I breathe in the cold air, the fragrance of flowers came along with it reminding me of my mother's garden at home. I walked down the stone foot path that separated the beds from each other, my easel under my armpit and a basket of paints and brushes in my right hand. In front of the little pond across the pink carnations, there was a park bench. The walls of the manor had not given me peace of mind. Sitting inside felt as if the walls were closing on me. But walking into nature was peaceful and created balminess in my body.

I settled down on the park bench mesmerized by the lands that stretched out. The manor was far away from where I sat. The manor was a big white house that stood high with grace and might in the pale blue sky of the chilly day. The white paint coating the building was dull as the dreariness of the sky beats down on it. Vast green lawn, trimmed yellow, red and green bushes, tall green trees and beautiful vibrant flowers that lined the stone walk path added a great touch of nature to the environment but due to winter, most of them were losing their colours and beauty. The red roof was peaked, slanting down at a point. The glass windows gleamed from being cleaned. Balconies were carved out from different parts of the manor. I dropped the basket and proceeded to put down what was in front of me.

"Noorie" a voice called from far.

I glanced up from my work as I scribbled down my name at the bottom of the painting. From where I sat, I could see someone running up to me, her hair dancing in the winter breeze with a shawl around her neck. Behind her, three little kids followed her, screaming my name. As they came into view, I saw them clearer, my lips crinkled up. It was Zoya bhabi and her children. They were dressed in coats and shawls. The twins looked so adorable in their identical coat and beanie. Zahra wore the same coat with her mother and beanie with her younger ones.

"Wait for me!" Farhaana screamed, her tiny voice echoing through the lands as she tried catching up with others.

"Mama, that was cheating" Zahra said as they came to halt. Zoya bhabi laughed as her breathing came out faster.

Farhaan ran back to meet up with his twin. Holding her hand, together they ran back towards us. Farhaana was so cute with her hair divided into two and pulled into two bunches and Farhaan, should I say he was cuter? Zahra had her hair tied to the back into a ponytail.

"Mama" The twins called panting.

"It was long" Farhaana spouted clapping her small gloved hands.

"It was an exercise sweetie" her mother answered, panting. "Now, you can all give me a kiss" she touched her cheeks. Together, the three of them planted a kiss on her cheeks then hugged her. "We were searching all over the manor for you Noor" she turned towards me pulling out of her children's grip.

"I am sorry I left. I just wanted to take some fresh air"

"Mahira is here" she said looking at my painting. "That's pretty" she commented smiling at me.

"What is this?" Farhaan asked pointing a finger to touch the wet painting.

"Don't touch it!" Zoya bhabi scolded but she was too late. The twins had touched the painting staining their little fingers with it.

"It is colour" Farhaana said awed by the thing on her finger.

"It is not colour. It is a paint" Zahra answered.

"Got you" Farhaana stained her twin's cheek with her finger. Green smeared on Farhaan's cute cheeks.

"Farhaana" he screamed then began chasing her around. Their tiny giggles overpowered the air around us. Zoya bhabi nodded her head at their act, her hair swishing.

"Aunt Noorie, you paint?" Zahra asked.

"Yes I do"

"So this is where you are?" Mahira's voice followed through the wintry air.

I turned to my left where her voice had come from to see Mahira standing a displeased look on her face and her hands on her waist. My smile grew wider at the sight of her.

"You disappeared. Do you know how worried everyone was?" she marched up to us.

"I am so sorry" I said pulling my ears.

"You did not take your phone. I tried your number only for me to find it ringing in Aaryan's pockets.

"That's true" I rubbed my gloved hands together. "Aaryan wanted to check my family's photo so I gave him my phone"

"Don't fall down!" Zoya bhabi shouted at her children but they all tumbled to the wet grass giggling at their play. Farhaana sat up pulling her elder's sister leg.

"Very troublesome" she seethed.

"And adorable" I answered. Her sealed lips quivered into a smile.

"We are going for a tour around London" Mahira said tugging at my hands. "I am taking you out"

Her words brightened my inside, my eyes growing wide with excitement.

"Really?" I screamed clapping.

"Sure. You cannot stay cooped up inside here. Let's go and get you dressed" she pulled me towards the manor.

"My painting" I reached out for it.

"Just forget the beautiful thing and let's go" she pulled me along with her.

"I will take care of it" Zoya bhabi shouted after us.

As if I was a sack, Mahira dragged me into the house. I apologised to the family for being out without telling anyone.

The thought of going sightseeing made me happy. I have always loved visiting new places. It was an escape from home. I walked into the closet in the room after moving out of my clothes. The rolls of dresses in my wardrobe made it hard for me to choose. I ran my fingers through the dresses, searching for something to wear. I had it at the back of my mind that it was cold outside and I needed to wear something that will keep me warm.

Behind a deep purple shirt dress that had full sleeves, there was a black straight sleeveless dress. It caught my eyes along with a blush pink coat with polished big buttons. I pulled the dress and coat out then walked back to the room. The dress clung to my body moulding my figure perfectly. I stood in front of the full length mirror admiring the way it fitted me perfectly. I had always loved dresses that were sexy and very feminine.

I have admired dresses that were short and skimpy showing off curves in the right places. I also liked dresses with a high slit and backless. Because I have gotten long legs, it had increased my desire for mini-skirts and shorts. Crop tops were one of my favourites. The way they show flat toned stomach of girls, I had loved them. All these clothes I loved, I had bought very few along with me. Many times, I had wanted to wear them in our room but the audacity was not there and Amir's reaction kept playing in my head. What will he think? How will he feel? What will be his reaction? That thought kept whirling in my head whenever I looked at those clothes. That night I had worn a backless night dress, I had not known my husband's reaction. He had said nothing about it.

Eager to be out, I threw the blush pink coat over my body, it glided down to my knees free on my body covering the tight dress then I sat in front of my vanity. My vanity was filled with varieties of lipsticks, eye shadows, mascaras, eyeliners, powders, creams, perfumes, foundations, eye pencils, and lip liners. A big size box had been used to pack them from Nigeria. Sister Amatullah had said I will need them but for what? I loved makeup but very light and natural. I preferred my lipsticks to be nude but what I had on my vanity were varieties of colours and products. I dabbed powder on my face, lined the bottom of my eyes with kohl, brushed my eyelashes with mascara which lengthened it and touched my medium size full lips with nude lipstick. I completed my dressing with blush pink ankle stiletto boots, a black scarf and Versace little box bag Hooriyah had gifted me. I turned around in front of the mirror impressed with what I had worn.

As I walked to the door, I remembered something. I walked back to the closet and search for a camera brother Yusuf had gifted me. He knew I liked sight-seeing and thought it would be nice to gift me a camera. On my collection of nighties, the camera laid there. I was not a photo freak but I loved to capture memorable moments.

Downstairs, Mahira sat in the living room with the rest of the family. Aaryan was entertaining them with a dance that made everyone laugh. His father had laughed until his eyes tear up. Reshma who was displeased decided to show hers which was worse. Laughter floated out of my lips when she tried copying her brother's steps.

"It is not fair" Reshma spouted when the laughers grew louder.

"Just go and sit down" Her mother waved a hand to dismiss her wiping her tears.

Defeated, she sat down. Nani seemed to be having the best of her time. Both Tubassum and Shazia were off to work. Aaban, I have not seen him for days which were relieving because I am beginning to get furious with his lustful looks. If he is not careful, I will make sure he does not father a child.

"Noor, let's leave" Mahira said.

"Allah Hafiz" I waved at everyone as we disappeared into the foyer which they replied to. The kids told me to get them something from my outing.

"So are you ready?" Mahira asked kicking her yellow Porsche to life.

"Of course" I answered enthusiastically.

"Let's enjoy our day" she screamed switching on the radio. I screamed along with her.

In Mahira, I found a new friend who could cheer me up without worries. Mahira was someone who had brought a smile on my face. In the family, I found endless love which was pure and real. London was good except for the fact that my husband was not always around and the weather is not friendly to me. It would have been better if he had my time. But sooner or later, I knew he would come around but before then, I should enjoy life with the rest.