Feelings and how i am allowed to feel

You must be thinking wow this is going to be amazing, well it’s not. I am 15 years old can’t talk about my feels or mental disorders because it’s frowned upon or nobody wants to see you struggle. All my friends can talk about their problems but i’m just here to fix them. My friends get care packages or mental health support packages from my other friends and they all think Cali is fine nobody needs to talk to Cali cause she’s got it all worked out in her head she doesn’t need help she’s fine. Well i’m not, and i’m not saying i want attention because i don’t i want to be treated the way others are and i want to feel wanted. I don’t get that. I don’t understand how to express or explain my self when i’m feeling down or frustrated because that shows weakness and i’m not weak. Everyone always talks about how it shows how we grow as a person but all i ever hear is your weak you can’t just leave nobody cares; and maybe it is in my head but that doesn’t mean it isn’t loud. Who knows maybe it’ll be a better day tomorrow or the next or the next.