Secret crush

Chapter six - Don't be like her

Hunter's POV:

I'm starting to feel like Ellie wants me to be myself. I never thought that I would talk with her for so long. She is not a terrible person. The girl told me many things. There is a reason why I wanted to ask her about all these things. My friends don't care about that. They think about having fun. I can ditch them, but this means I have to be alone. I'm not sure if I want that. I don't have other friends. Ellie and I are nothing. I don't want my friends to be after her because of me. Of course, I won't tell her that. The less she knows, the better. Mom said that she was right. She likes her, no matter that they have never met. I know she is right, but I care about too many people. I can't let go of my friends. They will hate me. I can sit and talk with them, but I don't expect them to understand me. Everything became so complicated. Maybe I care too much. We won't be at the same university. I have to think about myself. I bet they won't help me with that. The other thing is that I have to hide Ellie. I don't want to do it. She is such a nice person. It looks like I'm talking with her when I'm free. That is not the reason, but I can't do it publicly. We can keep it short for texting. I hope that I won't do anything to disappoint her.

I started disliking school. This time, it's not because of the teachers. My friends keep asking me questions about Ellie. Molly is annoying me every day. Rebecca and Stacy are busy with my friends. How often do I need to tell her I'm not interested in her? She won't understand me. I can slowly distance myself, but it won't be a solution. Do what you feel is right. These were her words. Maybe this is what I will do. It's time to take things into my own hands. I want to be with people who are like me.

I have Literature. That is one of my most boring classes. I chose to sit next to Ellie. She didn't mind at all. I know part of her likes this. She couldn't hide her smile for long. We didn't talk, but there was no need to. I could read her like an open book. After the class, she went to her locker. I decided to follow her. I saw the look from my friends. It doesn't matter anymore. I can be with whoever I want to be. That includes the people around me. I should've done this a long time ago.

- Can you move a little bit? - Ellie asked

- Why?

- Because I don't want to die that young. - she said, and I laughed

- That won't happen. I promise you.

- What made you change that quickly?

- I started to think about what you said. Do what you feel is right.

- I'm glad that you decided to listen to me.

- Do you see the boys over there?

- Yes.

- I'm going out with them next week.

- You won't be sorry.

- You know them?

- Maybe. I won't say anything else.

- What will you do in the afternoon?

- Well, I have to finish my schoolwork for the day.

- After that.

- I don't make plans. I do whatever I decide.

- We can go out if you want. There is a van that sells food. This can be our dinner.

- Why not?

- Are your parents on a night shift again?

- No. They should be home for dinner.

- Do they rest?

- Yes, they do. Sometimes, they take a few days off from work.

- I'm sure they will come to your graduation.

- I haven't asked them. I have a lot of time until then.

- What will you be for Halloween?

- I don't know. I won't go trick or treating.

- No one said that you have to do it. We can walk around the town.

- What is your costume?

- I can't decide between the two.

- What are the options?

- Sushi chef or a superhero. Marvel.

- I might like Marvel a bit more.

- There are so many characters. How can I choose only one?

- Eliminate the women ones.

- What if I want them?

- What?

- I was kidding. I might go with Thor.

- Hopefully, you can pull it out well.

- Why?

- It's my favorite Marvel character.

- Really? I better start getting muscles.

- Good luck. You don't have much time

- Miracles happen.

- Not when it comes to you. - she said, laughing

- Very funny. I can prove you wrong.

- I would love to see it.

On the lunch break, I sat at a table alone. Ellie wasn't here yet. I will either be alone or with her. I'm not in the mood to be with my friends. They are annoying me. I never thought I would say this. Some things change. I was eating my food when a shadow appeared in front of me. I didn't say anything and continued eating. I won't let them bother me. It was Jackson and Molly. They are the last people I want to see. She should go after him. I can see them together.

- Will you go? I want to eat. - I said

- Are you waiting for someone? - Jackson asked

- No. I want to be alone today.

- Then why is she coming here?

- Who?

- You know who.

- Stop playing dumb and sit with us. No one wants to be around Nerdy Ellie.

- Maybe I want to be around Nerdy Ellie.

- What?

- I didn't mean it that way. I'm so sorry.

- No, it's ok. I'm not surprised.

- I guess we are sitting here today. - Molly said and sat down

- No, you aren't.

- I'm already here.

- Enjoy your company. I'll be there if you need me. - Ellie said and walked away

- I guess you will be alone. - I said and followed her

- You are quick.

- I'm so sorry about what I said. I didn't mean that way. Can you forgive me?

- I don't know. Can I?

- Ellie.

- Relax. I'm not mad at you.

- You aren't?

- No.

- Why?

- You wouldn't be here now if you meant what you said.

- Maybe.

- You are a good person. Your friends can't change that.

- Do you still believe in this?

- I know it. After all, I see it every day.

- Thanks. At least I can count on you.

- Always and for everything.

For the rest of the classes, I was at the back. Sadly, I couldn't sit alone. My friends keep telling me not to be like her. No matter what they say, I won't stop talking to her. She is right about one thing. I should focus on myself. After school, I decided to go home. I planned to go out with Ellie. I might leave this for another day. I'm not in the mood for that. Mom was with her laptop in the kitchen. She didn't tell me she would come home early. At this point, I don't care. I have other things on my mind.

- Hey, mom. It's a surprise to see you that early.

- I didn't feel well, so I decided to work from home for the afternoon.

- Are you ok?

- It was temporary, but I won't go to the office. I'll go there tomorrow.

- Good.

- What is going on? You don't look in the mood.

- It's nothing. I'll be in my room if you need me.

- You can talk with me. I'll use this as my coffee break.

- Do you care?

- I'm your mom. Yes, I care. What kind of question is this?

- You have other work to do.

- My work is not more important than you. Talk.

- My friends don't like that I started changing.

- It depends on what the change is.

- I started taking care of myself. I want to think about what I'll do after high school and where I'll be.

- There is nothing wrong with that. Now is the time you have to do it.

- They keep saying that I look like one of the girls in my class.

- Why?

- Because she is the same. She has planned everything about her future. I mean, at least in the next five years.

- I don't see any problem with being organized. Honestly, I like that. At least you have a plan. No one said that things would go that way. The important thing is that you know what you'll do.

- They only care about making this the best year in high school.

- You can do it too. Do what you like.

- You sound like Ellie.

- I don't know who she is, but I'm sure she is right.

I think she had Ellie as a kid, not me. Their visions are the same. Mom and I kept talking for a while. I told her I planned to ghost Ellie today, but she changed my mind. According to her, the most important thing is to be with someone with who you can discuss it. That's how we went out for dinner. I found a quiet place near my house. I didn't want to go far away. I sent Ellie the address, and she came. At least she is not mad at me. I received a message in the group chat, but I ignored it.

- Are you ok? Your mood is gone again.

- I'm fine. Thank you for coming.

- Always. What did you order?

- Nothing. I was waiting for you.

- Aw, thank you. I appreciate that.

- How can you be so nice to everyone, no matter how much they bother you?

- Easy. I care only about a certain number of people. Every nice word said to me is like a reward.

- I need to take some lessons with you.

- If they were your friends, they wouldn't have treated you like that. I'm not saying I'm better, but at least I won't judge you for your choices. Everyone should be free to do whatever they want.

- You might not like the question, but do you have friends?

- Close ones like yours, no.

- Why?

- Since I started focusing on myself, I realized some things about myself. I mean, like interests and hobbies. I haven't found someone with who I can share all this.

- You can share them with me.

- Really? Do you care?

- I was curious what you do after school.

- Why? You thought I was only studying.

- Maybe.

- I have plenty of other things to do. Studying is not everything.

- I can't believe you are saying it.

- I didn't lie. I want to have good grades, but it doesn't mean it's at any cost.

- What do you mean?

- I won't throw my life away because of a perfect diploma.

- Isn't this what you wanted? I mean, to get into a good university.

- Yes, but I can do it without perfection.

- It's good that you know what you want.

- You know it too. Your problem is that you care too much about the consequences. Let's order now.

The more she talks, the more I realize she is right about everything. I care too much about my friends. We have been together for a long time. I can't leave them like that. No matter that they are ready to do it. We started getting distant. I don't think it's because of Ellie. They hate that I prioritize myself and don't do what they want. I did this for too long. Now, it's time for a change. I have to take things into my own hands. If I don't get accepted into a university, they won't be there to tell me it wasn't for me. They don't care about this. I hope that I'm not making a mistake.