Blessed & Broken

Chapter 13

A few months had come and gone. School was officially out for summer and I had picked up a tutoring position offered by the school for the summer break. There were small tables set up all over the gymnasium for the students who were taking part this summer so that they could get individualized attention from one of the attending teachers. 

I was standing by the entrance doors greeting each student that came in. To my surprise, Cole and his mother approached. “Cole, it’s so nice to see you”, I smiled. Mrs. Mackey roller her eyes and scoffed, “You’re tutoring?” I kept my polite smile and responded, “Yes, I am.”

She let out an annoyed sigh. “Well, it’s not like its real school or anything. Anyways, it gives me a break from him so that I can catch up on my tennis lessons.” I wanted to punch this woman right in the taint. However, I kept my composer. “He will be ready for pick up at noon”, I informed her. She just walked away. Not a hug or a kiss for her son. She didn’t even have the decency to tell Cole goodbye. 

When she was gone, I gave Cole a big hug and said, “I am so happy to see you! Are you ready to get started?” He gave me an enthusiastic smile and nodded his head.

Today was an introductory session where we got to know the kids that we were working with, better. I was surprised at the answer Cole gave me when I asked him what he wanted to be when he grew up. “I want to fix hearts”, he responded. I looked at him and asked, “Why?” I could see the wheels turning in his head as he reminisced. “Because, my grandpa got sick. He had a heart attack.”

My face turned concerned. “Oh, no! I’m so sorry, buddy.” Cole looked at me. “The heart man fixed my grandpa’s heart.” I smiled at him and asked, “So he is ok now?” Cole nodded his head excitedly. “He would have died if the heart man didn’t fix his heart. I don’t want anyone’s grandpa to die”, he said with so much compassion. “That’s why I want to fix hearts.”

I then proceeded to ask Cole if he knew what a person was called who fixed hearts. He answered, “Heart fixer.” I informed him that they are called, “Cardiologist.” “Carliologist?”, he questioned. I giggled at his response. “No, honey. Car..di..ol..o..gist.” He sounded it out with me until he got it right.

“I am so proud of you for wanting to help people”, I praised Cole. “I think that if you keep practicing and work really hard, you can be whatever you want to be.” He smiled brightly at me. “Will you help me?” I gave him a look and said, “Of course, I will, silly. That’s what I’m here for.” He giggled and we kept on track with the work we needed to finish for the day.

The summer had been going by so fast, that I didn’t know where all of the time had gone. I spent most of my days tutoring at school and my afternoon and nights with Ian. I was incredibly in love with that man that I felt as though I was going to bust at times. I was in a state of eternal bliss with him. We rarely ran out of things to talk about, and when there wasn’t anything to say, we were just as comfortable with each other's silence.

Fourth of July was here and mom and George had planned for all of us, including Aunt Jess, Gemma, and Eric to attend a Fourth of July celebration at a lake in a nearby town. It was a huge cookout/party that everyone went to. It was honestly my most favorite time of the year.

Boats, jet skis, and water toys filled the shoreline. People of all ages, played on the sand and in the water. Gemma and I tried out paddle boarding. I wasn’t the greatest, but at least I gave Ian a good laugh. One awesome feature that they added this year was floating eating areas. We ordered our food from the BBQ pits. They then pack the food in floating coolers where we could float it on the water to our eating destination.

We munched upon juicy cheeseburgers, steamy grilled hot dogs that snapped when biting into the casing, and tender fall off the bone ribs, smothered in sweet savory BBQ sauce. All of this was accompanied by creamy chunked potato salad with extra dill, buttery corn on the cob, and sweet baked beans that swam in a thick sauce.

I was in Heaven right now. I was with the people I loved the most, eating delicious food, surrounded by the water. I loved to be in the water or close by it. In some way, it made me feel whole and cleansed my spirit. 

As we grazed upon the summer spread, Aunt Jess asked how tutoring was going? “It’s great! I love what I do.” My Mom chimed in and said, “Guess who she gets to tutor?” Aunt Jess looked at me and then to my mom. “Cole Mackey,” mom said dramatically. 

Aunt Jess started to laugh and said, “Poor kid. That mother of his is something else.” I gave a quick discussed look. “Nasty b***h is more like it” I said under my breath. “Kalia Elizabeth!”, mom scolded. “Well, it’s true”, I argued back. “You got that right”, Aunt Jess backed me up. Mom shook her head in disapproval.

“How do you know her?”, I inquired to my aunt. She rolled her eyes. “I went to school with her. Trust me, that woman hasn’t changed a bit.” I shook my head. “I feel sorry for Cole.” Aunt Jess was quick to say, “Oh me too! She didn’t even want him. She only had him to snag Lance.” I looked at her and asked, “Who’s Lance?” She glanced at me surprised because I didn’t know. “Cole’s dad.”

“Brooke, Cole’s mom, and Lance dated back in high school. She had her whole life planned out”, aunt Jess said. “You see, Lance’s family had money, lots of money. Brooke had dreams of a very social life. Days filled with lounging in the sun and nights of lavish parties. You know, diamonds and pearls.” Aunt Jess lifted her eye brows to me.

“She had her mind set that she and Lance were going to get married and she would live the high life. Well, right after graduation, Lance broke it off with her. I think she literally went insane for a while. Of course, she didn’t have any back up plans and her parents weren’t going to take care of her. They told her that she needed to get a job, and oh boy, tell Brooke to get a job and she would think she just got sentenced a life in prison.” I chuckled because I could just image it.

One night, she caught Lance drunk off his ass and completely took advantage of the situation. So, she got pregnant, knowing damn well he wouldn’t leave her then, because of his family”, Aunt Jess looked at me and said, “She never wanted that kid, but having him was her hook, line, and sinker into that family.”

My heart hurt to hear this. “I can’t believe that,’ I said in disbelief. Aunt Jess agreed with me and added, “It’s obvious though. She pawns him off anytime she can.” Then I asked, “What is Cole’s dad like? I have never met him.” Aunt Jess wiped her mouth after swallowing a bite of food. “He’s cool. He was super nice in school and I know that he thinks the world of Cole. But he’s never home, with all the traveling he does for work. It’s a shame that a sweet boy like Cole, has such a lunatic for a mother.” 

I looked over at Ian. He looked back at me with a grin. His beard was speckled with corn and painted in BBQ sauce. “Well, good thing you don’t have to go very far to wash your face”, I teased him, laughing. He leaned over and kissed me, making my lips all sticky. 

Aunt Jess went back to the previous conversation. “I'm glad that you are tutoring Cole, though. It’s good for him to have someone like you in his life.” I smiled at her thankful for her kind words.  Mom joined back in the conversation by saying, “Ever since she was little, she always wanted to be a teacher.” She smiled as she went back in time. “I used to watch her set up all her baby dolls and play school.”

Aunt Jess laughed and asked, “How many kids did you say you wanted back then, Kal? Wasn’t like fifteen?” I started to giggle and said, “Something like that.” George looked up from his plate and said, “Well, she’s got them, plus more. How many did you have in your class this past year”, he asked. “26”, I responded.

Gemma added, “Ewe.” Eric looked at her concerned. “What’s the matter, Gem?” She looked at him and said, “All those kids.” Then she stuck out her tongue as if she tasted something sour. Eric’s face went bleak. “You don’t want kids?” I could see the guilt sweep over her face. “Not really”, she hesitantly answered.

 Mom saw the situation and decided to save the moment. “It’s so much different when they are your own, Gem. You’ll like your own kids”, she promised with a wink.

We all smiled and it seemed to lighten the mood. Aunt Jess then asked me, “So, Kal, do you still want fifteen kids?” I chuckled and said, “Maybe not that much, but defiantly a few.” I felt Ian look at me as Aunt Jess said, “A few is like two.” I laughed and pondered out loud, “Maybe just eight”, I teased. “I don’t know why, but I've always dreamt of having a big family. I love hearing the sounds of babies laugh and kids playing. Watching them sleep at night dreaming of happy thoughts.” I shrugged my shoulders and let the thought go.

I smiled and looked back over to Ian. The smile that graced his face was no longer there. A look of worry replaced it. “What’s wrong?”, I asked quietly. He shook his head as if he were trying to wake himself up and said, “Nothing.” His smile reappeared but it wasn’t as genuine as before.

After we ate, everyone got back into the water to play. Ian’s body was present, but his mind wasn’t. I didn’t want to keep harping on him, by asking what was wrong, especially when other people were around. However, I knew something wasn’t right.

Later in the evening, when the sun had set, we all gathered along the shore to watch the firework show that was about to start. I snuggled in between Ian’s thighs as he wrapped me into his arms.

I sat there and, in my head, I began to thank God for all of the wonderful blessings in my life.  Especially for this magnificent creature that held me. How so very grateful for the joy and happiness that he brought to my life.

I looked around at everyone who surrounded me. There was so much excitement and happiness all around. A big boom rang in my ears as I saw the reflection of bright glittery sparks, speckle the water. An ensemble of claps and hollers of enthusiasm, roared through the crowd as the firework show began.

I loved the way the thunderous booms rang through my whole body. I loved the looks on everyone’s faces as they lit up from the bright shiny massive sparklers. But I loved being encased in Ian’s love the most.

He was quiet on the way home that night. In a way, he seemed lost. It made me feel unpleasantly uneasy.

When we got home, I went upstairs to shower the lake water and sand from my body. As the warm water trickled down my flesh, my mind filled with all of the reasons why Ian was so quiet. 

He was waiting for me in my bed when I finished. He held his arms open so that I could slide right into them. His embrace felt so calming and safe that I drifted into a peaceful sleep.