A Saint's Disguise

The bedroom door was ajar, just enough for the light to spill into the hallway. I would have kept walking if I hadn’t heard my husband’s voice...low, and strained. Not speaking, breathing, gasping for air. I stopped. Curiosity took one step forward. Instinct took another. And then I saw them. My husband was bent over the bed, his back to me, his shoulders tense, his movements steady and unashamed. His shirt lay discarded on the floor, my favorite one. Sweat rolled off his back and beneath him was Victoria. Her head thrown back against my pillows. Her hands clinging to him. Her lips parted in soft, broken sounds that made my ears bleed, she was moaning his name, over and over. I didn’t breathe, I couldn't. I watched the rise and fall of his body. The way he fit against her. The way her legs locked around his waist as if she had done this before. This was not hurried. This was familiar. My sweet husband, the man who kissed my forehead before work, who bowed his head in prayer at night, was inside another woman, moving like he had nowhere else he’d rather be. “Joyce won’t be out till tomorrow,” he murmured, breath uneven but calm. “Relax.” Tomorrow. I felt something in my chest lock into place. So this was planned? Scheduled even. I stood there long enough to notice details that would haunt me forever. The flash of his wedding ring as his hand tightened on her thigh, the quiet confidence in his movements, the absence of guilt. Someone who swore his love to me on my birthday, three days ago was begging Victoria not to stop. I walked quietly to the kitchen and came back, with a knife in my hands. JOYCE POV A day before. Today was supposed to be my day. My 25th birthday. Just a few more years to 30. But I have gifts that make me love my life dearly, my husband and inlaws. I was excited to celebrate with my family but the party was no longer for me. I was practically invisible while the guests trooped in. I hid in the corner of my room, helpless, watching her take over my life, my hands gripped the wall frame so hard I cut myself. Sounds of awe filled the room but it wasn't for me, it was for her. Victoria's melodious voice filled the room, like she owned it..like she owned my house. My chest hurt, every note hurt. I hated it, I hated the fact that I couldn't sing to save my life, I hated the fact that she was better than me..that she was prettier than me, that she was younger. "Wonderful!" The guests clapped, forgetting themselves as they surrounded her. She looked perfect but my husband Sam made it worse. He looked at her like a man in heat, like she was the prettiest woman in the world. I felt a sharp pain in my chest, and I called out to him.."Jack". He turned to me quickly and his face lit up with a smile, there wasn't a single glimpse of guilt in his face. "Joyce, my angel, are you having a great time"? He said walking over to me. " Why were you starring at her that way" I asked fumming inside. "Nothing...My pretty flower is jealous I see" he said chuckling. "Come on, let's cut the cake". Victoria and Jack have been friends since forever, they've done everything together all their lives, gone to the same schools and were joined to the hip ever since. His family never really liked Victoria, she was just tolerated because of Jack but his people loved me. I have also never liked Vicky, she claims to be just a friend but is always overly affectionate with my husband, whenever we try to set her up on dates, it is always one excuse or the other. She always has time to insert herself in my life though, she's at every celebration, every event, at breakfast, at dinner, she practically lives with us at this point and I was sick of it. "Happy birthday Joyce" she said, her gaze moving between me and others. "I know you weren't expecting me here.. you know, since I wasn't invited". I wasn't stupid enough to invite my husband's bestie to my birthday, after months of watching my husband follow her around as though they were stuck together as glue. I just wanted today to be mine. My birthday wish was that Jack only focus on me today. The two of us hadn't had a proper meal since Victoria flew in from her vacation because she always had an emergency that always needed my husband. At least for today, I thought jack would only finally give me attention, remember I exist and that the world doesn't revolve around Victoria and her wimps. Jack approached us, his expression unreadable to me. " I asked her to come Joyce, I hope you don't mind. She was pretty bored at home". His voice sounded so natural, like it was the normal thing to do. "I didn't say anything please" I hated why I had to defend myself, how my voice shook, how I could feel the tears at the back of my eyes. "I just thought for once, this party will be about me, how crazy right? I mean it's not like it's my birthday or anything". "I'm sorry baby, but Vicky had nowhere to be and she's practically family. I apologize for not asking you first." He said softly. I now felt like a villain as everyone stared at me with judging eyes, they'd never understand. "It's okay Joyce, no need to overreact" his aunt said softly. I walked away quickly, pushing through a bedroom door and slamming it shut, then I let the tears fall, they were silent but they hurt so badly. Then I heard a voice in the bedroom. "Joyce?" That voice, I knew that voice, but it couldn't be....