For Your Love

I have to let her go

It has been a month since the last time I saw Maja, the guilt of what I did to her has been eating me up. I don't deserve to be with her.

I have to let her go for her to be happy as I can't do her an injustice to her by forcing her to be with me when I am only capable of hurting her. I have healed completely but I still have not recovered all my memories, I remember everything that happened for the passed five years and nothing before that. I remember the guilt in my heart but not the reason why I felt guilty. I made a mistake of judgment at the hospital and ruined everything once again.

Maja and I love each other but perhaps we were never meant to be together. Every single day has been nothing but hell without her, my heart is constantly in pain. I can't put in words how much I miss her but I know that it will be better if I stay away from her.

No words can define how much I love you, my love for you is as wide as space and I don't how far you are to cause I know we will always cross paths. Destiny shall reunite us maybe not as lovers but friends.

Clara and I have renewed our friendship, we get together once in a while to hang out. It is true that a common pain can bring people closer to each other. She misses her best friend and I miss the love of my life. Most of the we meet we talk about her to ease the pain, I don't know if her eases but mine gets worse with every passing moment. My is burdened by guilt and regret of pushing her out of my life.

I hope she finds someone better than me and moves on from this disastrous love. I pray in my heart that she finds happiness and is always blessed, may she never suffer the same pain that I caused her.

I try to get through this nightmare by concentrating on work. I have started a new project which is very hectic so it requires my full concentration. I have done so much for the last week that if dead were merciful it would have taken pity on me and ended my life. Work has become the only thing I do, think about or even talk about.

In order to successfully let her go I need to get her out of my mind. I was working diligently when I heard a knock on the door. It must be my secretary with more work for me, I have requested him to find more work for me and of course everyone else.

"Come in." I say as I continue working on the project, without taking my eyes off of the file i ask him to put the files on the table.

"I don't have any files with me," I heard a beautiful feminine voice say. I immediately looked up and froze when I saw who it was that spoke to me.

"Maja ?" I ask more than say, how can she be here I must be hallucinating. This is what happens when you think about someone for a long time, you end up losing your mind. I have completely lost it . I reached for the office phone and called my secretary and asked him to come to my office.

"Can you see the lady sitting there ?"I asked my secretary once he came into my office.

"Yes sir, she told me that she was a friend of yours and that she was here to give a surprise. Is something wrong? Should I throw her out?" He asked looking more confused than a lost puppy.

"No, there will be no need for that you may leave now and lock the door on your way out."

I sit right next to her and hold her hand just to make sure that it is really her. Her beautiful eyes never leaving mine as sat down quietly looking at me.

"What are you doing here ?" I finally asked her when I was sure that it was really her.

"I came to see you." She answers so innocently as though her coming to see me is the most normal thing in the world.

"I mean you were supposed to be in London right, then how come you are here?"

"Am I not allowed to come and see you. Look i thought alot about what happened between us and I realized that the problem was always lack of proper communication between us. That is why I am here, I want us to talk."

"You can say anything that is in your mind I will listen." I say honestly to her, l have already hurt her so many times but still she has come back to me. I can't trust my own judgment so I will simply do exactly what she says. I will not even give it a thought because my thoughts might mislead me again.

"I want us to start a fresh, a new

beginning for both of us," she reached into her bag and removed a ring from it, she went down on her knees and looked up at me." I want us to put the past behind us, I can't live my life without you. That is why I want to ask you something important, will you marry me Adrian ?"

My heart started beating rapidly and my breath hitched and my mind went blank. I gave her my hand and allowed her to put the ring on my finger. She got up from the ground and gave me a tight hug.

This all feels like a dream it feels like I am floating on cloud nine. I am very happy today, I think that I am the luckiest man alive. I consider myself to be so fortunate to have a forgiving and loving girl like her. No matter what I did to her she stayed true to her love even today she has proven to me that love truly conquers all.

I could not find the courage to face her but she gathered enough courage to not only forgive me but also propose to me. How many men are lucky enough to say that she was the one who proposed and not me. I will not disappoint her, I will make sure that she is the happiest woman on earth.

"Maja I love you."