New Beginnings: Stories from Beauville

11. India-2

“Are you okay?”

“Huh?”

Hae-in sits me in the chair, crouching in front of me. “You okay, India?” he repeats his words again, wiping the tears from my cheek with his large hand. “Let’s get you some fresh air.”

I nod and allow him to help me stand.

“We’ll take her,” Finn interrupts, putting a hand on Hae-in’s shoulder. I don’t want them causing a scene. Not that I did any better.

“It’s okay,” I whisper, trying to get my legs to feel stable. Pouring all of that out at one time is emotionally draining. And my head is aching.

Hae-in shrugs Finn’s hand off his shoulder. “I’ve got her. She’s gone through enough.” Hae-in grips me tightly around the waist and supports me as he walks me out into the lobby. When we exit the building, the night air hits the heat of my skin, cooling me down.

“I’m okay now,” I say, placing a hand on the side of my head. Hae-in’s grip tightens around my waist, and he takes me over to a bench in front of the hotel to sit down.

“You’re still shaky. Take a deep breath.”

I do.

I lean forward, place my head between my legs, and let my shoulders relax. I can feel the tension in my body. Tight coils that loosen with each breath I take. I can feel Hae-in standing next to me. It doesn’t take long for Sawyer and Finn to make an appearance.

“Who the hell do you think you are?” Sawyer advances, but Hae-in stands his ground.

“I’m someone who cares about India’s health and mental well-being.”

I hear Sawyer’s knees c***k as he bends down in front of me. “Sweetheart, we both know we were in the wrong. We are trying to make it right.”

I look up at Sawyer. “How? You think us pretending to be family is the answer? It’s not.” Sawyer grabs both of my hands in his.

“Why not? We love you.” Sawyer’s denim blue eyes are piercing. Like he’s trying to see into the deepest part of me, searching for the answer. It’s not the one he’s looking for. There is truth in his words. He really thinks he loves me, but behind the veil of his forced emotions is pity.

Pity and guilt.

I know I would see the same in Finn’s eyes. They want to ease their own guilt and hurt. They think the three of us together is the way things should be. I pull my hands out of Sawyer’s and shake my head. “Let’s talk tomorrow after we’ve all calmed down. For now, I want to get some rest. Hae-in, I’ll visit with you tomorrow. I’m sure you’re tired from the flight.”

I look over at Hae-in, he’s smiling down at me. “I’m tired. But I came here to spend time with you. Let me at least get you a cup of tea before you leave, and that way I can confirm you’re okay.”

He’s being thoughtful.

“I can do that. Sawyer, Finn, meet me at the office in the morning and we will talk then.”

Sawyer curses under his breath and although Finn is reluctant, he agrees.

“Indy, we may have agreed not to take things further, but we did not agree to not being part of your life. We’re not giving up.”

Neither was I.

They won’t like my thoughts on the subject, but they’ll have no choice but to accept it. I’m my own woman who makes her own choices and I’m choosing me.