I'm Not Me Anymore

11 - Continuation

"Lily!"

I flinched when someone shouted my name. Natauhan ako nang ma-realize ko na nasa harapan ko na pala sila. 

"Akala ko ba bibili ka? Ano ginagawa mo rito?"

"Wala. May kumausap lang sakin," I gave them a small smile but I saw on their faces that they are not convinced.

Should I tell Kiel regarding Bridgette that she said 'hi'? I would feel guilty if I won't but at the same time, It feels wrong. Hayy! I've been overthinking these days.

Pagkadating ko sa cafeteria, halos lahat na sila nandoon. Pero bago ako makarating sa table nila, nakasalubong ko si Bridgette and she winked at me while smiling. 

Pagkadating ko sa table, Kiel was busy on his phone while eating. Mukang hindi naman siya na o-out of place dahil kinakausap naman siya kanina ng mga babae. 

Pero bakit parang kasi nagbago si Kiel?

I hate this!

I ordered some meal for me at dumiretso sa table namin. I sat beside on Kiel at napansin kong nagulat siya, he immediately hid his phone on his pocket kaya naman nag salubong yung kilay ko.

What's up with him?

We only had few discussions sa lessons namin. After class, mas nauna akong umuwi sakanila. I don't know.. I just feel so empty today. 

Habang ako naglalakad papalabas ng school, I was busy scrolling on my i********: nang may biglang bumangga sakin. 

I accidentally dropped my phone and my wallet. I raised my head while frowning my eyebrows at napansin kong lalaki pala yung naka bangga sakin. 

"Sorry, Ms. Hindi mo kasi tinitignan daanan mo eh," 

Halos umakyat yung dugo ko sa inis. Inis kong kinuha yung cellphone ko at wallet tsaka tumingin sakaniya nang diretso. 

"Kasalanan ko bang bulag ka? Ikaw yung naka tingin pero binangga mo ako? I can see on my peripheral vision yung dinadaanan ko,"

"Woah.. woah.. bakit ka pikon?"

"Pake mo?! Halatang sinadya mo pa eh," inis kong pagkakasabi.

Nag simula ulit ako sa paglalakad without looking back. Pucha, paano ko nagawa iyon?! Ako pa ba ito? I never knew I have this kind of nerve na makapag salita ng ganoon!

Pagkauwi ko sa bahay, I took a quick bath and I prepared my meal. Pagkatapos kong mag prepare, umupo ako sa sofa roon sa living room. I opened the T.V tapos nagpatugtog ng 

Gone by Rosé 

"I just wanna be the one.. but to you we're already done.. tell me, why'd you have to hit and run me? Now I'm all alone, cryin' ugly.. you broke my heart just for fun.. took my love and just left me numb.. now it's eight in the morning.. hate in the morning.." sabay ko sa kanta habang nag s-scroll.

Habang ako nag s-scroll, biglang nag pop yung notification ko sa messenger. 

From: Ungas

kallie: si lily nasaan? may picture siya na pinaguusapan sa gc ah.

sydney: yeah, where is she?

kristen: takte kayo, wala siya roon? @lily pinaguusapan ka sa gc.

Bigla bumilis ang t***k ng puso nang mabasa ko ito. 

lily: may problema ba?

kallie: may issue ka lily,

Napatayo ako wala sa oras kaya naman agad ako nag reply sa message ni Kallie sakin. Anong issue iyon?!

lily: huh? anong issue?

kallie: basta. i will add u nalang.

After a few seconds, nag popped sa notification ko na inadd na ako ni Kallie sa isang groupchat na sinasabi nila. Nakita ko rin yung pangalan ng groupchat.

BIG ISSUE NG GRADE 11 EINSTEIN

bridgette: guyss i created dis gc becuz of wut i saw earlier!!!

classmate 1: omg! what is it?

classmate 2: spill da tea!!!

classmate 3: wtf... kabago bago palang ng klase natin mukang may issue n ah..

bridgette: look at dis!

Halos manigas yung katawan ko sa nakita ko. 'Yon iyong picture naming dalawa nung lalaki na nang bangga sakin.

bridgette added mateo ezekiel sanchez to the group.

mateo: im sorry? but i think thats some kind of a mistake.

bridgette: ezekiel, my boy, are u blind??? ginayuma ka niyan nohhh? kitang kita sa pic kayaaa,

'Yong sa picture na iyon, 'yon iyong inis ko kinakausap yong lalaki pero sa picture, naka pamewang siya while he was smirking. Habang ako, seryoso akong naka tingin sakaniya. 

classmate 4: ano namang problema riyan? mukang naguusap lang naman.

classmate 5: oo nga?

bridgette: shut up! look at the guy, he was smirking at lilian and lilian was looking at him straight to his eyes! halatang may something.

classmate 3: isnt she taken?

bridgette: 50/50! i feel like they flirted tho! my god ezekiel kawawa ka naman. u dnt deserve getting cheated on!!!

kallie: excuse me? lilian is my friend, at alam kong hindi niya 'yan magagawa. 

sydney: exactly. ano bang problema mo?

kristen: tf is going on here? 

alina: lah. wth are u up to?

alivia: can u please stop spreading some rumors about lilian? u don't have any proofs that they flirted. that's just a stupid picture of them na halatang stolen pa. 'di porket u guys captured that picture while the guy was smirking, ibig sabihin they are flirting already. are u dumb?

bryan: awts ang ganda mo pa naman kaso ma-issue ka, dinaig mo pa mga dispatch, bridgette ah. magkano bayad sa'yo?

eiden: gago ka pre babae 'yan HAHA

bryan: who cares? she's spreading rumors without any proper evidence.

sean: ig she wants lilian's attention,

Nang matapos ako mag scroll sa conversation ng group chat, I immediately started typing. Nakita ko rin na nag reply yung Bridgette sa mga message ng mga kaibigan ko.

lily: no one asked sa explanation ko but idc. i had to defend my self. kanina i was scrolling on my phone at yang lalaking yan, binangga ko niyan. galit ako niyan nung nakatingin ako sakaniya nang diretso, habang siya inaasar asar ako dahil pansin niyang pikon ako kanina.

bridgette: shut up brat! stop denying of what u did!

kallie: how did u capture that in the first place then?

bridgette: i was about to talk to lilian because i need somethin' from her. then ayan.. i saw her talking with that guy, flirting.

kallie: weh? o baka naman you paid that guy na banggain siya at picturan sila habang naguusap? admit it, u just want to create some rumors and s**t. ano bang problema mo sakaniya?

bryan: alagang dispatch 'yan. 

Ayoko nang makipagaway pa. Bahala sila. For now, I had to talk to Ezekiel. I was about to text him nang may biglang kumatok sa pinto. Agad akong naglakad papuntang pintuan para silipin kung sino yong kumatok.

I took a glance sa bintana at nanlaki mata ko nang makita ko si Ezekiel. Ano ginagawa niya rito? What the hell.

Agad kong binuksan yung pintuan, his facial expression was serious. Habang yung mga kamay niya nasa bulsa.

"Biglaan ka ah," I chuckled.

Dire-diretso siyang pumasok ng bahay kaya naman napakunot ako ng noo. Don't tell me naniniwala siya roon kay Bridgette?

"May problema ba?" sabi nang patayin ko yung cellphone ko.

"What's up with the picture?" 

Bumilis yung t***k ng puso ko. Hindi ko alam kung pano ko sakaniya ie-explain. I mean, I know it's not true! Pero.. natatakot ako. I don't know! Hindi ko maintindihan sarili ko.

"Inexplain ko na sakanila ah.. hindi mo ba nabasa?" mahina kong tanong.

Huminga siya nang malalim as he held the bridge of his nose. "So much chaos. Tangina! Gulong gulo na isip ko!"

Halos mapatalon ako nang sumigaw siya. Napaatras ako nang kaunti with all the fear and shocked. 

"Sorry.. I'm sorry.. dumagdag pa ako sa-"

"Ano bang problema non?! At iyong lalaki na 'yon, sino 'yon?!"

"H-hindi ko kilala!" mabilis kong pag tanggi. "Bigla niya nalang ako binangga habang ako nag ce-cellphone! Wag ka maniwala roon, Kiel. Hinding hindi ko magagawa 'yon sa'yo!" pagpapaliwanag ko. 

"Ang dami ko nang problema, Lily.. tangina," his voice broke.

I hate this.. he said everything was fine. I feel like I'm such a useless girlfriend. He was there for me when I feel so lost. Pero 'yong siya na, I can't even make him feel better.

"W-we can fix this out, okay?! pagusapan natin nang maayos. Hindi maayos 'tong problema natin kung idadaana lang sa galit," taranta kong sabi.

"Fine.." 

I hugged him habang ako umiiyak. Dahan-dahan akong humiwalay sakaniya at inaya ko siyang umupo sa sofa. 

"Hindi ko alam kung anong problema nong Bridgette but I know she have bad intention between us. Kung ano mang issue na ikalat niya sakin, none of them are true.. and same goes to you,"

Nakatulala lang siya sa T.V nang sabihin ko iyon. "Kiel? Nakikinig ka ba?" maingat kong sabi.

"Oh yeah.. oo naman. I guess she just wants to destroy this.. thing," sabi niya na may pa hand gesture.

"But no one can destroy that right?" pag kukumpirma ko.

Huminga siya nang malalim and he held my hand. "No one,"

Kusang tumulo yung luha ko sa pisnge ko at inakap ko siya nang mahigpit. "I.. can't lose you. I'm afraid the day will come na aabot tayo sa time na magkakaroon tayo ng misunderstanding and we ended up stopping our thing dahil doon," I sobbed.

"No.. that's not going to happen. Hindi kita iiwan,"

I felt a huge relief nang marinig ko iyon galing sakaniya.

Author's note

I didn't separated ng classroom sila Lilian, Sydney, Kristen, Kallie, Alivia, Alina, Sean, Bryan, Eiden, Apollo, and Ezekiel although I'm completely aware na separated ng classrooms pag iba iyong strands. It's only work of fiction lang naman, and we will be focusing sa mga magiging ganap ng school life nila hindi mga lessons sa klase nila or any! 

Thank you for reading.