OVERFLOWING EMOTIONS

ANITA'S POV Today is the day I'll be going back to that hell of a place I once called my home town. honestly I'm not too enthusiastic about it and the thought of going back gives me chills and I can feel my stomach turning. I feel sick, and I almost cancelled my flight in the morning but then again I can't miss this meeting else my 5 years worth of hardwork will go in to drains.. I look back at how far I have come and all it took to be here and I can say I'm very proud of myself. I'm opening up another Branch of my company in Windsor and nothing can stop me, not even my memories of the place and what I went through there. I have come this far and I deserve every bit of respect. " mommy, why are you not ready yet. I want to go and find daddy," Ashley's voice interrupts my chain of thoughts and I look at her frustrated face and I can't help but smile at how adorable she looks. She just turned six years old but she acts older than her age. "just give mommy five minutes sweetheart," I respond to her smiling. I remember few months ago telling her that her daddy was busy with work in Windsor that's why he never visits. it hurts to lie to her but it's much better than telling her that her father never wanted anything to do with her. At first she never asked anything about her dad and I was happy I didn't have to lie to her but all her friends have dads and that was enough for her to raise questions about her dad. Few hours later we had already boarded our flight and by the time we took off, Ashley was already fast asleep. I looked at her beautiful face that had her father's features and I couldn't help but think of the first time I held her in my arms. **flashback, 6 years ago** "It's a girl, you have a beautiful daughter miss," the nurse announced with a wide smile. I turned to take a look at her, my heart filled with emotions and yearning to take her in my hands. It had been a night long of pain, torture and frustrations but she was finally here. I wanted to hold her in my arms, but the nurse wouldn't let me. "Please be patient for a little while so that we can get her cleaned and dress her," she said. Few minutes later, the nurse entered, my princess in her arms. she handed me the baby and directed me on how to breastfeed her. I couldn't get most of what she was saying as all my thoughts and attention was directed at the beautiful little princess in my arms. I looked at her beautiful, brown yet innocent eyes. she was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. I had fallen in love before, but not this kind of love. The love of a mother to her child. She fell asleep few minutes later and all I could do is stare at her beautiful face, so delicate and soft. Tears of joy streaming down my face, I made a promise to my little princess. "Ashley, my love, my heart, my everything. I'll love you with all my heart and I will do everything I can to make sure you lack nothing." As I looked at her innocent face, while she slept peaceful, my heart raced with joy and at that moment I knew that was not just a promise but a life time goal as well. **end of flash back** I look at her sleeping and a sigh escapes my mouth. I dread returning to my home town because I know it's not going to be an easy ride.. I have lied to Ashley about her father for a long time that I don't know how I'm going to handle her when we arrives. I don't want to hurt her but I can't continue lying to her.