Happy Birthday (One Shot)

PATRICK'S POV OCTOBER 20. Years passed. How many birthdays have passed? Now it's my birthday. There's the spaghetti, and the cake that is ready at the dinner table to share with a lot of indescribable smiles so that you really feel grateful for grace. I looked at those around me who were full of big decorations. If you are going to describe the appearance, it looks like you are in the ocean, and there are Patrick Star designs that make me happy because that is my favorite. "Happy Birthday to you~ Happy Birthday to you~ Happy Birthday~ Happy Birthday~" I gave them a sweet smile first before I joined them in singing the last line, "Happy Birthday to you~" "Happy Birthday, Patrick!" They greeted me together. I smiled at them once again before I spoke, "Thank you, everyone." This day I am happy because, even though fragments of sadness hunt me with no trace, I see that there's no turning back now, because this is what I am now telling me. You need to make sure that your day will not break apart as it was my special day, my very own birthday. I will never forget the days that we had and will definitely cherish them in my memories. This memory will be the best description of me. It will maintain incomparable happiness and will always make me who I am today. Happy Birthday to you, Patrick. I saw that my boyfriend had smiled at me while he held my birthday cake, "Make a wish, Love." When Daniel said that, I immediately closed my eyes. I wish... I wish you were still the star in my darkness, Daniel, not giving me a gloom of night, and I hope my friends still don't leave me, and every birthday we are still so happy, as if there is no stopping the laughter and fun that the people around us can easily notice, because we are happy. When I opened my eyes unexpectedly, I could not see my friends and even my boyfriend Daniel was not there either. All I could see was a cake while the candle was still lit. With my great hope that they can come today for my birthday, it has reached my imagination what I want to happen. But that's the end of it because... They didn't come, they forgot my birthday. ___ I just blew out the candle and decided to leave the house because I had no reason to stay there. As I was walking down the road, I found someone I love heading to the playground. "Dan..." I called you because I wanted you to ask a lot of questions like why did you forget my birthday today? Are you really that mad at me? Just because of what I did before? But my thoughts just stopped there because you still didn't look at me, so I decided to go in your direction and touch your shoulder. "Daniel, I know you're still mad at me because I suddenly disappeared on my birthday and our anniversary, but you don't have to do this to me, if you want to shout at me, do it, if you want us to separate, tell me!!!" I said, but instead of answering me, he just looked at me and passed me as if I were just the wind that passed by him where he continued to walk, like he had an important walk. The days went on and on. I keep watching you from afar and as I think of a way for you to approach and talk to me again. But many days and months passed. While I was secretly watching you, I was so confused. Why is it always like that you ignore me? Until one day I see you sitting on a bench while you look at the photos of us together. I'm happy because even though we're still not okay, you still remember me while you're looking at our pictures together, but it's like I just poured cold water on what I heard from your lips, "Patrick, didn't we talk before? That until the end of our lives we should be together. Why did you precede me? Why did you leave me on the day of your birthday and our anniversary? You know what...it still hurts because even though I wish a lot of times to see you again, that will never be fulfilled." That's when you said that I just realized... that I'm gone. I just felt my tears flowing from my cheek. I was also crying because of the constant dripping, falling on the wooden chair, and my tears are falling even more because I don't know what's going on? Why did it get to the point that I left you that we weren't okay before? Now that I see you crying, it hurts me even more. If I could just wipe the tears that drip from your eyes and wash away the tears, the questions would be manageable, because the quantity can swallow them. How many times have I waited for you to talk to me again is the same length of time I have cried since I heard that. I blame myself for why this is, and why did that happen? Why is our faith like this? Why is love like this? "Patrick, you finally realized that you were gone." I stopped crying, and I turned to see who was speaking. He looks like a normal person like me, but if I'm dead, why does he still see me? "Who are you?" I asked him and he looked at me seriously. "My mission is to gather the souls of the dead and hand them over to the afterlife." My forehead frowned at what I heard, collecting the souls of death? Does that mean he's picking me up? Suddenly, I felt afraid of him, but I still used my strength and I knelt in front of him and begged, "I beg you, don't take my soul first. I still want to see the person I love." "If I wanted to take your soul, I would have done it before. Patrick, I also want to help you talk to him again, because I saw what happened to you and your boyfriend. By the way, I'm Yuan, the Grim Reaper." He introduced himself to me. Now that I've talked to the Grim Reaper, it currently mixes my emotions. Happy because there's still hope that I can still talk to Daniel? And it hurts because I already know in myself that I am no longer here and, after this, Daniel and I will never meet again. ___ One time I saw Daniel walking to the bar, but time was running very fast. So I felt very scared, that a nightmare would happen the next time we met, he would not answer me, he would never talk to me, and most of that, I would never see him again, forever. That's why I immediately followed him inside the bar. When I went inside, I saw no one else inside but only the two of us. I saw him sitting on modern bar stools, so I sat next to him, but I was just surprised that the bartender was Yuan. He looked at me as he wiggled his eyebrows. He whispered to me, "I'll help you now, just wait." After he said that, I saw that Daniel had already ordered wine, while I watched them both. I looked at the Grim Reaper again and asked, "What are you planning?" "Just wait." He answered while handing a bottle of wine and wine glass to Daniel. And when Daniel put the wine in the wine glass, and started drinking it, Yuan's face showed a grin, that made me wonder. He was about to drink another glass again when Yuan spoke, "Sir, do you know that there is a free cake when you order wine? This is the free strawberry cake." He said, then he put the cake with the candle on the table at the same time. "I don't know if you're teasing me, but I'm sorry, I don't need that. Even though I'm going to wish on that cake, my wish will not be fulfilled." He replied as he put another wine in the glass. Yuan was about to speak when he spoke again, "Maybe if I just didn't know that he wasn't here anymore, I would wonder if I lacked the love given to him, or he was the one who didn't fight. Because when we last talked that night, it was his birthday and our anniversary. That night...that night I planned to propose to him because I'm ready to marry him and I know he really wants this to happen but unexpectedly...." When Daniel said that, everything suddenly flashed back to me. [ Flashback ] "Love, be honest with me. While I'm away, are you with someone else?" I seriously questioned him on the cellphone while I was driving to Daniel's house. "Why is this your first question to me? And what do you mean? You know I would never do that to you. Patrick, you know how much I love you, but wait, are you driving? Didn't I say I'd pick you up at your house?" I could only hear his voice and felt that he was about to be mad at me, but I should have been the one who was mad between us. Because Justin had just told me that he was with someone else, and I saw with both of my eyes that he was with Mika at the beach. "So, what? Why don't you just tell me the truth? DANIEL!! You're still trying to lie. I saw with my own eyes, you two are just together on the beach. Do you really want to cheat on me?" I shouted, and I almost flew into a rage in the car because I was so mad at him. "Love, do you trust me? Mika is also your friend. Patrick... Did you doubt my love for you?... Uhm. Nevermind. We'll talk about this later, you're still driving. Be careful." Before I could answer and end the call, I was surprised that I came across a car. Before I could turn, it was all too late because of the speed of events. My body crashed into the windshield before I rolled down the road. After that happened, I couldn't breathe. I was still forcing myself to get up, feeling that I was already under the heavy fruit, that no matter what happened, no matter how hard I woke up my eyes, my body itself was increasingly gradually giving up. I'm sorry, Daniel. Because I didn't listen to you. I'm sorry because right on my birthday and our anniversary I can't come to you. I'm sorry because this is probably my last breath here. I'm sorry because now that I open my eyes for the last time, I won't be able to see what you look like. I won't be able to hold your hands, I won't be able to hug you again, I won't be able to kiss you again, and I will never tell you again how much I love you. Daniel, I'm sorry. [End of Flashback] "It's very unfortunate what happened to you and your boyfriend, who would have been your fiancé" Yuan said once he looked at me worried. I saw that Daniel drank the remaining wine in the wine glass. After that, he said, "Yes. If you're the one in my situation, you'll just think about it. Why does it happen? Like the person I love, leave me alone, maybe because no matter how much you fight for everything, even if you have passed all those tests? Trials? All the problems, especially that he doubted my love for him, and suddenly he left me alone, crying. Tears seem to flow into the sea, because of the pain I feel. Everything that happened is my fault. That wouldn't have happened if he didn't doubt whether I cheated on him or not. It hurts because before he disappears, I still have a lot to tell him. Why does he have to disappear from me right away? WHY?" And I see every tear in the eyes of the person I love, even if I want to wipe it using both my hands. In this situation, I can do nothing but only watch you, Daniel. "But are you aware that your wish will come true when you're going to wish using the birthday candle? But you shouldn't just say it in your mind, but yes, I need to hear it. Why don't you try?" Yuan said, which was the reason why Daniel looked at him as if he was still hesitating if he would do what Yuan told him. But after a while, he gradually looked at the cake with the lit candle. I saw that he closed his eyes while his two hands interlocked his fingers to make a wish. "I wish... I wish to see and talk to the person I love again." Yuan smiled and looked at me. He said, "Patrick, you only have 5 minutes to let him see you, so talk to him and tell him everything at the last moment, when the candle is no longer lit he will never see you again." 5 minutes. In that fast time, I had to say everything and do most of it, being with him at the last moment. When Daniel opened his two eyes and I could see the joy in his eyes when he looked in my direction, "Love...LOVE..." he called to me, at the same time he hugged me tightly. I couldn't stop myself from crying as I hugged him back as well. "Love...I'm sorry. I'm sorry because I doubted your love for me the night that we fought. I'm sorry because I didn't follow you. Uhm, I only have a little time, so please tell me what you want to tell me." I said and I let go of his hug. Now, I could see that he was also starting to cry. He immediately held both of my shoulders and said, "Love, about the beach with Mika. I would have planned to take you there, and I would propose to you that I want to marry you. Do you remember when we were talking while we were watching the stars? You said you wanted to get married, but you wanted me to propose at the beach. Patrick, every year my only wish is to see you again. I really miss you and love you so much." When I heard that, I felt weak. Perhaps the tears were suppressed, like crying. It turned into sobs. That I insist on confining the waters of the chisel. That I force myself to swallow the pain, the ache. "Love, I'm really sorry. It's really my fault, not yours. Please don't think that I doubt it because I already realized a long time ago that I was wrong. I should say that I am very lucky because my boyfriend loves me so much that he will do everything to make the person I love happy. But Love, during the many years I have been watching you, I can see how much you have suffered because of me, because until now my image is still what you are always thinking as well as our memories together." I said as I looked into his eyes, and slowly I held his two hands. "I wish..." he suddenly held my hand tightly. I felt that he was shaking, as if he could no longer stop the tears that were still coming out of his eyes. "No, Love... Patrick...don't do that." I just smiled at him, even though my heart was already hurting so much. It really hurts when we want to express our feelings to the person we love, but we're holding back because faith has already chosen the path for us. I want to say that I hope I am still the one you love, no matter what happens. That I hope when you wake up the first thing that you will remember is our memories together, but I am selfish if I do that, and I don't want you to suffer anymore. "Hopefully, starting next year on my birthday and our anniversary, I won't see you sad anymore. I hope that if someone comes into your life who loves you dearly and can accept you fully, you will give him a chance, and you will also learn to start loving again. Daniel, I love you, but I don't want you to suffer because of me. That's my birthday wish. Daniel, happy anniversary. I love you so much." The sobs of our crying are all the things that you can hear, as if the heart is drawing because of the extreme pain we are feeling. I closed my mouth with my lips as I tried to calm myself down, but my tears were already flowing like water. I was about to let go of both his hands when he tried to stop it by holding both my hands, "Patrick, I don't want to let you go." "But you need to. Please," I said while slowly removing his hand and holding mine. "Love... Daniel....I love you so much. Please be happy." Even in your next chapter, even though I am no longer there...please be happy. "I love you so much more, Love. I really do." He replied, while he was holding my right cheek, and I was holding his hand as I looked him in the eyes. We smiled at each other. Even if he only looked at me, I can already feel how much you love me, Dan. That's why it hurts so much, because I'm no longer here, and I can't let you continue living in my life. He slowly brought his face closer to me until I felt his lips into mine. I kissed him back, while the tears in my eyes kept coming out. No one broke up with the two of us, and we continued to kiss, but before he looked at me again, he suddenly lost consciousness with his head on the table. "Time's up, Patrick. Don't worry, he's just sleeping. When he wakes up he will just think he is just dreaming." I saw the birthday candle that was no longer lit. I looked at Yuan. I smiled at him and said, "Grim Reaper, thank you so much." After I said that, I looked at Daniel for the last time. Before this special day is over, I just want to let your heart know how much I yearn for you each day. I love to see those lines curve over your lips and how they reach your eyes, those glittering eyes full of love and affection. They sparkle only for me. Daniel, I just want to say that you are the one and only person who I love so dearly. You made me believe in the power of love, and you taught me how to love. Thank you so much for this once and a lifetime ride. You made me feel things that I never knew existed. You are the only one in my heart. I love your flaws, no matter who you are. I adore you because you are the Daniel of my life. The only person in Patrick's life. I will never forget the happy memories we shared together. I remember back then, when we talked as we watched the stars shining so bright in the sky. We even thought about whether we could stay like this until the afterlife. We can hold on to each other's hands till then, right? And we promised to stay together until the end of our lives, but now why do I feel so drifted and far from you? I should be there by your side each day that passes. Now, it's too late for me to take you back for me. You will not notice me because I am a wind to you. Daniel, I know you still love me, and you are waiting for me to come back, even if it is impossible to happen, but my wish is that if someone comes into your life who can love you completely and accept whoever you are, you will love him back, and I wish that you won't have to wait for me anymore. I don't want to make it difficult for you, I don't want to see you hurt every year because of me. Daniel, I hope you have happy and fun memories in the next chapter even without me. Thank you so much for all the memories you have built that have become a part of my life. I love you so much. Goodbye, Love.