Rogue

Chapter 2

Aiden POV

I run like I'm being chased by all hell. And I'd rather have it that way than fight the pain right now. Its piercing scream tears me in two. It took every ounce of willpower to get away from her. The wolf in me howls with grief. I can't give in, I'm Alpha Supreme now. The good of the pack is above my needs. Though I love her, she's no match for my Luna. No one knows who her parents were, what pack they belonged to and unfortunately that's the way people think. For many she has remained a rogue even though most of her life she has been with me. Her unusual beauty was not overlooked. As a child, she was tolerated but as time went by she blossomed and the seed of envy began to grow. It was only my reputation as a cold, hard Alpha that kept the gossip from taking hold.I pulled away from her even though I knew I was hurting her. Even though she was shy and reticent I knew she liked me and the adoration in her beautiful eyes when she looked at me couldn't hide it. And now this. The curse of soul mates. Her tiny body might resist my embrace but a child would be a death sentence.

I need an heir, a future Alpha for the pack. One as feared and respected as I am. And I want her alive. Even if we both suffer at first, time may pass. Maybe.

I wake up in her room and I don't even know how I got here. I just want to see her for a moment. To fill my mind with another image than the one I had before. But the universe has decided to punish me. It sleeps, but it's not natural sleep. It's probably induced by who knows how many sedatives. He's curled up in a little ball and sobs from time to time. Salty tears stain his porcelain cheeks, his lips are dry and cracked and his hands have clenched into tiny fists that twitch spasmodically. I collapse beside her bed and can't control my desire, my need, my instincts. I gently run my long, silky hair through my greedy palms to feel her smoothness, softness and scent.

"They don't deserve to suffer like this!" My mother's cold, clipped voice snaps me out of my trance.

I stare in amazement at the one who gave me life. I'm sure my gentle, loving mother hates me now, and that hurts. It hurts me the pain I cause, the wound in my heart, hers, ours...

"I know, but I can't do otherwise!" The mourning in my voice softens her and softly, she begs me:

"Aiden, you can do anything, son! When I lost your father you were just a child and yet look where you've ended up. The strongest and most respected Alpha! Your will is law for all of us! Don't lose your love, don't lose your soul, son! Don't lose my little girl!"

If someone had disemboweled me alive, I don't think it would have hurt any more. Love and duty are two such different but equally important things. Whichever I choose, someone's gonna get hurt. And I chose to hurt love.

"I wish I could now, Mom! But it's impossible. I can't put the pack in danger. I've made many enemies and the news that my moon is a rogue adopted....think. And there she is! She's so tender and fragile I'm afraid to hold her. My baby would kill her! And I'd end up hating it!"

"Aiden, you're making the same mistake as everyone else! You underestimate her. She's much stronger than she looks! Underneath all that flimsy veneer is a big heart and a will just like yours. Do you really think she doesn't know what people say about her, she's never been hit by their badness? And yet, she's never lost her gentleness, her femininity, her warmth and her kindness."

Her words provoke a murderous rage in me. A red mist looms before my eyes. Who dared to hurt her and why the hell didn't I know?!

"I'll kill the bastards! I swear! No one is allowed to hurt her!"

"Honey you're the only one who does. Only you have that power. The rest never mattered."

"I'm sorry mom!"

I bend down and place a tender kiss on the tear-drowned cheek of the woman who will haunt my life. The wave of shock I feel between us almost destroys me. I haven't even taken the connection between us all the way, but it amazes me how strong it is.

Before I walk out the door, I turn to the most beloved beings in my life and say only one word.

"Forgive me!"

I garrulously descend the stairs and almost run into my brother and Jay, the third in command of the pack. I almost laugh when I see what they're holding. Just what I need.

Alcohol burns my throat and I wish it would burn my pain too. Just for one minute, one goddamn minute, to feel nothing. We sit around the fire and I'm grateful to them for not saying anything. A bloodcurdling scream breaks the silence. She's awake. Her emotions and feelings hit me like a fist. Our channel is bombarded with her desperate questions.

"Where are you, baby? I need you! I'm begging you!"

I don't answer but I know she'll find me as I'll always find her. A silver bolt of lightning streams towards me and its beauty takes my breath away. It's the love of my life that I'll hurt and never forgive myself for. Hatred instantly overcomes me and I feel myself losing control of the beast inside me. My reason returns when I hear myself say the fateful words.

"I, Aiden Hunter, reject you, Silver White, as my soul mate:

For every word you said, I felt a dagger in my heart. Only my iron will held me up.

Not so with her. The terror and pain on her face was indescribable. Her hot, perfumed breath burned my face for I did not say the words without taking her in my arms, without smelling her perfume, without kissing that flawless skin. Maybe I'm a sadistic bastard but I need something from her, even a small memory. She'll be my ray of sunshine in the winter of my life. I feel her soft in my arms and I know she's lost consciousness. As a mother comforts her child, so I hold her to my breast. I know it's the only chance I have to hold her. I cradle her gently and kiss her full, perfumed lips, nuzzle my nose into the hollow of her neck, where life pulses so fast now. The soft, delicate skin exudes a scent of violets. It's her natural scent, a scent that always made me follow her as a child, when she wandered the woods in packs. And if anyone ever doubts my love for her, just look at the mark on her neck. The more we love, the more pronounced the colour. The wolf on her neck is so black it has onyx glints.

Like a bride, I take her to her room and with a broken heart I leave her in my mother's care. For the second time in my life, heavy tears streak my face. I leave with only my body out the door, my heart left in the small fists of my beloved sobbing in the depths of faintness.

I reach my room and quickly pack my bag. I have to go, only distance can heal us now. Before I get in the car, that's all I tell my two commanders.

"Take care of her!"