OPPOSITE REFLECTION

Jane's request

"Stacey, mum is asking if you have prepared lunch", Jane asks standing outside my bedroom door, it's better that way. I want her to stay just there, i do not wish to be part of her scrutiny.

I feel like telling her that she can cook the lunch herself, but no she is a visitor. Jane never loved doing anything, all she loved was good sleep while i did most of the chores. We were brought up by different nannies until we turned eleven, my mum was working fulltime so we had to assist her.

"Tell mum it's 11 am and food will be ready by 12.30", i tell her softly, that's my nature, soft spoken.

"Can i come in?", she asks

I close my eyes for seconds thinking about what she might have in mind. Maybe she wants to brag about her life, education and different achievements.

"Yes", i allow her in anyway

She smothers a smile and i sit up.

"Are you OK?", she asks upon seeing my emotionless face

"Yes, just fatigued, balancing job and taking care of mum is quite cumbersome", i lie

"You could have looked for a nanny to assist"

I just wish she is joking, life hasn't been easy since mum retired and the little pension she gets i use it to buy her drugs.

"A good idea but i earn ten thousand per month, my fare to work and back consumes almost half of that", i respond

"We can take her to an elderly home"

My eyebrows shoot up, she is crazy.

"No! Mum is going nowhere, i will continue taking care of her."

"I have realized that she has lost memory but she remembers me, it will be better if we take her there. She won't recall anything and you will have ample time to pursue your personal life", she says winking

"Am comfortable with mother being here, Jane you have just come and the first think you do is think of is getting rid of mum. I have taken care of her for the years you were away and am ready to continue doing so"

She shrugs her shoulders haughtily.

"Lunch!", she says leaving then stops midway and turns to look at me with creased brows and narrowing her eyes at me perceptively.

"What?", i ask

"She must be thirteen years now", she says with a sweet smile and excited sigh.

"Who?"

"My daughter", she responds and i glare at her like a statue.

***

Thirteen years ago

"Jane!", my mum shouts and my heart freezes. She is angry and we all know why.

Jane is lying on the couch her belly so big like a hot air balloon, she is pregnant. She committed a sin that my mum cannot hear about. Am sited silently hugging my feet, my chin on my knees. I feel like my mum will turn the wrath on me too.

"After today, i want to hear nothing about any baby. We are giving it away", she remarks angrily, she is just repeating this sentiment a trillionth time.

Jane is insisting on keeping the baby and my mum, a staunch christian cares so much about her name and reputation. The whole fuss is due to the fact that Jane is so attached to the baby, she won't let go.

"OK, can we go now?", Jane says in a haggard look

I assist her sit then go for the baby bag. She is tired i can see and occasionally whimpers in pain, i have tried to support her since the very day we knew she was pregnant, four months. I have played the role of a loving sister despite the fact i hate her conduct, the conduct that led to this.

My mum, still young and full of vigor drives at a high speed towards Coptic hospital. Her face is dark like the moonless night and her eyes have a tinge of darkness, a sign of sadness.

The drive is a silent one.

The evening sky's are limpid filled with red glow and the birds are thrilling the golden twilight with jubilant hymns to the stars of the evening that have started shinning.

I look at my sister, her face is pale blanched with pain. I can't wait for this to be over.

She labours for five hours, my mum is in the labour room to give her some moral support i guess. I have paced continuously waiting for any good news but it's taking too long.

My mum walks over.

"She is fine, you can go see her", she tells me

"What of the baby?", she ignores sitting and i walk to the room my sister is. She is happy to see me, for once she appreciates my presence.

"Stacey, i want to see my baby"

"What do you want me to do?", i ask clutching her hand.

"Tell the nurse to bring the baby, i want to see her and give her a name before she is taken away."

It's not hard to sweet talk the nurse.

When Jane sees her baby she smiles and i can feel the attachment she already has. Am saddened that she will give out the baby.

"It's a girl", she says holding her baby with her magical smile.

The baby is closing her eyes and she looks like an angel that she is.

Adorable.

Jane takes a yellow ribbon and ties it on her tiny head passionately.

"Take a photo of us", she tells me and i take her phone and capture that lovely moment.

"Am sorry, the baby has to go", the nurse announces and i see my sisters eyes glisten with a threat of unshed tears. She doesn't even name her.

I cannot fully understand the turmoil she is going through. Anyway she agreed to give out the baby without any conditions and the time has come.

I look as the nurse goes away with the baby and i feel like tears want to fly out.

****

Present

I recover from the stupefied state after a few seconds.

"You are not supposed to talk about that, you know the agreement", i tell her firmly

"She was my daughter and she still is my daughter, nothing can ever change that fact. Mum had no right to make me give away my baby. I came to look for her"

"Not until she turns 18, that's when you can be told her where about", i tell her sternly.

"That's five years from now and i got no time for that, i want you to assist me"

"Anything to do with that baby, count me out. I have lunch to prepare"

I rise and when am about to bypass her she grasps my hand strongly.