The Adulteress Queen

Chapter 11

After the bitter news regarding Faustos's upcoming marriage, Faustos and his father abruptly made another unannounced disappearance, which I unfortunately had to learn of through Korin. I was initially enraged. How that man could dare to break his promise to me after all the intimate moments we'd shared, I could not fathom. Sebastian must have known about their departure; the Hand would never abandon the king without notice, though whatever notice that might have been, it was not shared with me. And for Faustos to give me no notice before leaving was even more of a betrayal on his part.

Shortly after that discovery, Launch called me out for wallowing. I was glad she did, because I did not even realize how obvious my behavior had been, and I would rather it was her than someone else catching me. I had become so practiced with the affair that I realized I was becoming too complacent, which was completely unacceptable. I was happy to have the distraction of Lady Rebekah and Lord Yamcha's upcoming wedding. The occasion was to be a grand one, with me and Sebastian in attendance in addition to most of the nobility of the kingdom. Perhaps it was the arrival of another formal occasion that caused Faustos to run off just a month before the wedding date. He seemed to have a habit of avoiding weddings.

On the morning of Lady Rebekah's wedding, I noted Sebastian's grouchy air immediately. Upon meeting him for breakfast, he was more silent and difficult than usual. I watched him thoughtfully, wondering if I would behave that way on the day of Faustos's wedding. Realizing the inevitability of all marriages erased any inkling of guilt I might have had about throwing Rebekah's engagement upon her the way I did. If I hadn't, I was sure Rebekah would have been the Sons' first choice in a match for Faustos, and that was a thought I simply could not bear. I knew they were close, and I was already sharing one man with her. I would be terribly jealous of her with Faustos, and the situation would have been a disaster.

In spite of my hatred for Sebastian, I could not help feeling badly for him that day. I reached for Sebastian's hand as he mused with a deep frown over his untouched breakfast. I rubbed it consolingly and he looked up in surprise, utterly shocked at my kind touch. I might have been as well if I was him, but I understood that this day was difficult for him. It was one of the rare situations where I could relate to Sebastian. Perhaps it was solely because I missed Faustos that I felt some concern for Sebastian's feelings towards Rebekah. He was losing her that day, and it was possible that I would never see Faustos again. Even when he returned, if he returned, I did not know if I would want to see him.

Sebastian turned his hand up, accepting my grasp in his as he placed his other hand to his chin, continuing to stare straight ahead thoughtfully. I began eating with my free hand and we had a silent breakfast with a quiet understanding and appreciation for one another. The sounds of scurrying and quietly chattering servants, as well as the quiet noises of our eating and drinking, were the only sounds made through the duration of that meal. Though no words were said, it was perhaps the best company we had been to each other during a meal.

I headed to my chamber to dress for the wedding shortly after breakfast. After Launch helped me bathe, I changed into a deep red gown with long, draping sleeves and lacing all the way down the back which touched the floor. I wore a necklace with my family crest, one my father had given to me years ago. I looked at the Starsandsen on the amulet thoughtfully as Launch stood behind me, fastening the necklace. Being married to an Elite, I should have no longer been wearing the Mao crest, but I could not forget my roots so easily. I had a sentimental attachment to the Starsands Kingdom. I hoped Sebastian would not notice the necklace, or would overlook the slight snub to his family while I wore it. I sat after that, expecting to be retained for a while as Launch began braiding my hair, an endeavor that could be lengthy for an occasion such as this one. She would fasten many braids together into an elaborate bun, leaving two long strands hanging and framing my face before placing my crown atop my head. The process always took at least an hour.

"Your Grace, are you excited for the wedding?" Launch asked me as she began the first braid, tugging too tightly on my hair. I grimaced at the pain before answering her.

"I am sure it will be a lovely wedding." I answered her evasively. I could not say I was excited, though I was proud to make it happen. It was something that had to happen. Yet controversially, as I had been planning for this to happen, I was oddly unhappy about it.

"It will be lovely. You and Lady Rebekah have spent months planning together for it. And I hear Lord and Lady Towngrin have spared no expense in making this wedding an elaborate occasion." Launch gushed excitedly before eliciting a girlish giggle. "Do you know they will have ballads sung after the ceremony by some of the best musicians in the kingdom?" Launch asked me excitedly.

"Yes, Launch. I suggested that idea to Lady Rebekah when we were making the plans." I answered with a sigh. I truly was not focused on what she said as she continued discussing how exciting the wedding reception would be. I was racking my mind over the possible reasons for Faustos's disappearance again, as I had been doing over the past weeks. If someone did not reveal the truth about his and his father's disappearance during this wedding, I would enlist Korin's help in discovering the truth about his whereabouts and reason for leaving. I would have to send him to Montpaus to spy on Raditz and Lady Gine for me. I was sure Lady Gine knew where they were.

Shortly after my hair was finished, Sebastian arrived at my chambers, prepared to escort me to the wedding. He looked fine and elegant as he always did for these sorts of occasions, with a refined silk embroidered vest over a soft and airy tunic, and matching navy soft leather pants and coat. I reached for his offered elbow, exchanging a shy smile with him as he caught me admiring his appearance.

"You look...nice." Sebastian quietly said to me with difficulty. My eyes widened in surprise at the compliment. I almost thought I imagined it. As I glanced at him again while we continued walking arm in arm, I caught an eased expression on his usually stern face, which was focused straight ahead of us. At least I knew we were off to a good start for today. Perhaps we could avoid any arguments through the night.

The carriage ride to the sect was equally as quiet and soothing as breakfast had been, and I was tempted to wrap my arm around Sebastian's, a gesture I typically only practiced when there were others around to watch. He was again surprised when I hesitantly proceeded with the soothing gesture, drawing him from his deep thinking. To my own surprise, Sebastian placed his other hand on mine, drawing me in closer. I rested my head on his shoulder until we arrived. Nappa certainly appeared stunned when he opened the carriage door to see the position in which we sat. Usually we would be at opposite ends of the carriage, not even looking at one another. He helped us from the carriage, not even saying a word as we entered the sect together. Of course there was special seating for us, and Lord Piccolo promptly greeted us upon our arrival to escort us there himself.

"Your Grace, my Queen!" Piccolo said with a bow until Sebastian gestured for him to rise after a moment. "What a festive day to congregate. Is it not, your Grace?" Piccolo directed his question to Sebastian, raising an eyebrow and injecting smug satisfaction into his question. Piccolo turned his back to us, leading us to our seats while Sebastian shot a devastating glare at his back. I never had an inkling that Piccolo suspected what I knew about Sebastian, not until that day. But that man had been perceptive since the beginning, and he did have his spies. I should have known. Sebastian refused to answer Piccolo's question, so when Piccolo looked over his shoulder in expectation of a response, I rubbed Sebastian's arm in a calming manner, as he was trembling with barely contained fury, and responded to Piccolo with a charming smile. That day seemed the right opportunity to show a solid front to the people, especially suspicious, nosy people like Lord Piccolo. The act would inevitably help in squashing any suspicions that may have been arising from the more observant people about my recent behavior towards Faustos's disappearance.

"Of course, Lord Piccolo. You are keeping busy lately, aren't you? It seems the entire kingdom is getting married!" I exclaimed conversationally, immediately regretting my mistake as my comment opened up a topic I did not wish to discuss.

"Yes! I was just informed of the engagement of Lord Bane Son and Lady Videl Satan, your Grace. At least I can catch some respite before that wedding occurs!" Piccolo exclaimed with a smile. Sebastian snorted at the mention of the marriage.

"Bane, engaged to a child." Sebastian sneered. "He'll be bedding dirty whores until his wedding day." Sebastian commented with amusement. Piccolo turned and gave Sebastian a reproachful glare, as did I. Piccolo, because he spoke that way in the sect on a sacramental day, me because I could not believe he would say something like that about Faustos. Not to mention the deep offense I took myself to the idea of Faustos bedding dirty whores. I could not let it go.

"How can you speak of Faustos in that way?!" I hissed through clenched teeth. I was so angry that I did not even realize my slip.

"Faustos?" Sebastian asked with interested curiosity. Piccolo also raised his eyebrows at me and stopped his altar preparations to give me his full attention. I stuttered foolishly at them for a moment before I invented an explanation.

"I…apologize for the informality. Spending so much time with Lady Rebekah, the name is molded into my mind." I smiled and fluttered my lashes at Sebastian in mock embarrassment, and realized that was the perfect deflection. Sebastian was too thrown by the mention of Rebekah's familiarity with Faustos to worry any longer about me. Piccolo, however, still scrutinized me with mysterious silence.

"Hn." Sebastian simply grunted, not willing to speak his mind. But I had learned his quirks well enough now to know that he was thinking suspiciously of Rebekah and Faustos's connection. As if that mattered now. She would marry Yamcha today. I had seen to it that Rebekah would never be completely his.

The ceremony concluded uneventfully, the typical sweet wedding, and we joined the reception to congratulate the couple and enjoy a hearty meal. I was contemplative during the meal, feeling empty and lonely as I wondered again why Faustos left, and where he could be, and when he would return. As if I summoned for them, Lord Raditz and Lady Gine approached our table as I thought these things, greeting me and Sebastian with the answer to one of my questions.

"Hello, Sebastian. Queen Katarina." Raditz bowed respectfully, as Gine curtsied. Being an old friend of Sebastian's, Raditz was given the privilege of dropping his title on occasion. I had spoken to the man over the past months on several occasions, very superficially. Yet, I already thought I knew him so well, given my closeness to people who were close to him and my knowledge of his comings and goings.

"Raditz. When will we be coming to one of these for you?" Sebastian immediately prodded as he gestured around the filled reception hall, meaning to irritate his friend. He and I both knew that Raditz was not interested in marriage. The idea of being tied to one woman scared him, I thought.

"You are a riot, Sebastian." Raditz sneered playfully, not allowing his king's comment to rattle him. "If it were up to my mother, I would have been betrothed before Bane." Raditz snickered and Sebastian joined him, while Lady Gine and I frowned in distaste at the jab toward the recent engagement.

"That is right, Raditz." Lady Gine said with a stern gaze fixed on her eldest son. "If you continue speaking so freely, I will convince your father to arrange something for you when he returns, and you may still be married before your brother." She added slyly as Raditz frowned and looked away from her, keeping his mouth shut. Raditz lifted an appetizer from our table and sampled it. I looked expectantly at Raditz and Lady Gine. Perhaps this time I would receive a decent explanation about Faustos's whereabouts from his family.

"Anyways," Raditz added uncomfortably as he wiped his hands clean of crumbs and interestedly eyed Lady Maron gracefully gliding across the dance floor with Lord Lapis, "I hope you two enjoy your evening, your Grace, your Grace." Raditz added with dismissive bows to us as he hurriedly left us to pursue the dancing pair.

"You must excuse the absence of my husband and son, as I'm sure you've noted by now, your Grace." Lady Gine began, speaking eloquently as she sought Sebastian's gaze. I raised my eyebrows in interest while Sebastian looked bored and disinterested, his mind headed elsewhere. Of course Lady Gine knew that Sebastian already knew where they were, but she was making the point to mention their absence either as a formality on account of the current affair, or for the benefit of my ears. Lady Gine frowned at the king's lack of interest, then glanced at me, frowning just as much at my astute attentiveness. "It seems you had plans for sparring with Bane, your Grace?" Gine raised a questioning eyebrow at Sebastian, who seemed to pique in interest unhappily.

"Just how long will they be away, my lady?" Sebastian asked, seemingly pissed and suspicious. I supposed Bardock did not explain to Sebastian that their absence would be lengthy. I knew I would not like what I was going to hear, so I readied myself to avoid reacting. Lady Gine's expression turned self-satisfied as she set her gaze on me and answered Sebastian's question.

"Maybe five months or longer, your Grace." Five months or longer? How could he leave me for so long? I took slow, calming breaths through my nose as my lips remained tightly sealed, helping me contain my inner fury.

"Five months?!" Sebastian yelled as he rose abruptly, disturbing the people in the surrounding area who jumped in surprise at his sudden uproar. I was sure Sebastian was disappointed. Aside from Rebekah and ruling, he seemed to live for sparring, and Faustos was by far his preferred opponent. He cast reprising glares at those who stared, and the people quickly returned to what they were doing previously. "Just what in the hell are they doing?" Sebastian complained to Lady Gine, who balked in surprise at his rude address before composing herself with a dignified response.

"My husband had some urgent business to attend to with Bane, your Grace. It is a personal matter. Raditz can serve as Hand in Bardock's place until he returns. I am deeply sorry that you will be inconvenienced by their extended absence." Lady Gine said with a heartfelt tone, though something in her eyes told me she was not at all sorry about their absence. What could they be doing? I just hoped they truly would be back in five months. The coincidental timing had me suspicious that this was related to his engagement. Maybe he would escape his father and try to start a new life somewhere else without me. How could he do that?

"You'd better tell Raditz to practice handling his sword, my lady. I am going to need a challenge while Bane is gone." Sebastian growled to Gine in annoyance. Lady Gine nodded dutifully before turning to leave us. I looked down into my lap despondently. I was hurt by Faustos's disappearance. It was not the first time he had deserted me, and he might have been planning to stay away this time. I might have needed to let go, try to move on from him. Could I do that?

Sebastian continued to be distant and quiet for most of the day, aside from that conversation. As we said our farewells to Rebekah that evening, I could see the heartache she and Sebastian both felt. It was a scene reminiscent of my wedding day. A day I preferred not to relive. I quickly turned my attention to the groom, rather than witnessing again that pained interaction. I wondered if Yamcha had any idea. He certainly seemed oblivious, though he did make a point to hover closer to Rebekah as Sebastian spoke with her. Rebekah almost lost her composure for a moment; I detected a tremble of her lip as she spoke with Sebastian and shakiness in her voice until she promptly cleared her throat. Sebastian kissed her hand in farewell and I smiled at the newlywed couple, taking Sebastian's free hand in mine as I led him away from the other two. I almost had to pull him at first; he seemed planted in his place until I slightly massaged his hand with mine in an attempt to dissuade him from staying there any longer.

As soon as we turned to head for our carriage, Sebastian let out a heavy, pained sigh. I felt for him, something I thought would never happen. How did our situations become so complicated? I wrapped my arms around one of his, leaning into him as we walked together to our carriage. He did not embrace me, yet he did not push me away either. We rode in the carriage and I expected more of the same cold behavior from him on the way back to the castle. I was staring forward in another of our silent rides, prepared to return to my chambers soon and go to sleep as I usually did following an evening like that one. The warm touch of fingers then brushed against my chin, tilting it towards Sebastian's face, when his lips suddenly clashed against mine. My heart pounded nervously at the sudden, unexpected move. The kiss was much like the one we shared at the altar, and I could not help moaning into the sweetness of it. I kissed him back hesitantly, allowing my lips to part as our tongues mingled. I pulled away after a few moments, panting as my blood rushed in my head and my mind whirled in nervous chaos. What was I doing? I knew what Sebastian was doing, but I did not care. He was looking for a distraction from the loss of Rebekah, just as I needed a distraction from the loss of Faustos. I knew Sebastian had no feelings for me; he probably never would. But my heart belonged to Faustos, the man I could not have. I had Sebastian, he had me. I think we both understood that as we looked into each other's eyes while the sound of hoof steps ceased and our carriage stopped at the castle. Nappa opened the carriage door and I proceeded into the castle with Sebastian by my side.

We dismissed Nappa for the night, the guard openly surprised for a second time that night as we retreated together into Sebastian's chamber. I felt a need to fulfill my emptiness, which was fueling a desire in me that I had never felt towards anyone but Faustos. When I stepped into his chamber, painful memories of that place rushed back to me that were frighteningly crippling. I stiffened in fear until Sebastian stepped up behind me, gently caressing my shoulders in a soothing manner. This relaxed me substantially, as he was not at all the Sebastian I remembered from that night. No, this time he would treat me as a queen should be treated.

I turned towards him, gently placing my hands over his chest with his face just a whisper away from mine. I met his eyes cautiously, still too scarred from our first s****l encounter to make the first move myself. He knew this; I could tell by the look on his face. He wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling my body against his and kissed me as I closed my eyes and enjoyed the sensation. He released my lips and began kissing my neck. I bit my lip and moaned. It felt…forbidden, for some reason. Being with my own husband like that. No words were needed between us. Any discussion of what we were doing would only ruin the mood, destroy the bizarre spell we were under for the night.

Sebastian spun me around and began untying the laces of my gown, an exciting change for me, as I had never been able to undress for s*x before. His hands twitched excitedly against my back as he made his way down, until I felt the garment loosen around my shoulders and I was able to finish the task of removing the offending material, pulling down and stepping out of the pile of material my dress became. He drank in the sight of me as I spun around, and I knew I was blushing under his gaze. I quickly pushed my own embarrassment aside with the need to see my husband as naked as I was. I reached for the buttons of his smooth leather vest, making quick work of unfastening them. When he hastily removed the vest, followed by the tunic beneath it, I was impressed by the scintillating display of muscles in front of me. He untied the laces of his pants and removed them until we both were stripped down to our undergarments.

He moved towards me aggressively, one hand reaching the apex between my legs and the other reaching for a breast as he eagerly forced his tongue into my mouth again. I gasped at the sudden assault, so many sensations hitting me all at once. It all felt so exciting and I returned the kiss fervently. His lower hand quit fondling me through my undergarments and slid up to pull at my waistband, leaving me completely naked as my final piece of clothing fell to the ground. I pulled his down as well, and he walked toward me, causing me to continue stepping backward until I bumped into the bed. I fell back on it, Sebastian's intention since he began moving in on me. He smirked as he climbed on the bed, hovering over me.

His erection slid up my thighs as he moved up my body, both of us on the bed, kissing and caressing one another. He squeezed one of my breasts hard, a little too hard, and I moaned in pain and pleasure while spreading my legs for him to enter me. He pressed against my entrance, and I gasped as he slid in and growled with pleasure. I felt almost sick for a moment. For just a moment it felt so wrong to be doing that with Sebastian, like such a betrayal of them, of ourselves. But I reminded myself that he was my husband, and I should feel no guilt. So the guilt quickly washed away in waves of pleasure as Sebastian needily thrusted into me for a length of time. I could not believe we were able to go at it for so long, though I did not know how long it had been. It was such a freedom to not have to rush or worry about being caught. I laughed with the pleasure of that thought, and Sebastian startled for a minute, stopping his motion above me. I kissed his neck and ground my hips into him, encouraging him to continue as there was nothing wrong.

After finally making love with my husband of nearly a year for the first time, I was lying in bed, completely sated. My body was content and there was calmness about us both as we lay together naked in bed. We were able to fall asleep in each other's arms, and I enjoyed that at first. Just as I was dozing off, I felt almost panicked with dismay. I felt like I had betrayed my true love. He knew I was married, and all reasoning told me I did nothing wrong, but my eyes filled with tears as I lay on Sebastian's chest. My emotions would not allow reason to explain that away. My own irrationality kept me awake for hours, struggling internally as I lay against my husband who slept easy that night.

The following morning, I was seeing things differently, despite my lack of sleep. Rebekah must have known that was bound to happen, Faustos knew that was bound to happen and never seemed concerned, and Sebastian and I both knew it as well. I just never expected to enjoy it, and I didn't think he did, either. That was what really had me feeling guilty last night. The act itself was explainable; my lack of regret for doing it was not.