Nothing to Lose

ONE The sleek black car stopped at the curb. Her address. Yep, it still existed. Roxie Kyst was officially home. Should there be a woo-hoo? It didn’t feel like it. The real world. Going strong. Good for it. Life went on regardless of her absence… why shouldn’t it? The driver opened her door to help her get out. Waiting for assistance had become habit… Wow, when had she forgotten how to open a car door? How had she become indifferent to it all? Questions would drive her insane. Time to get over the vacation and focus on home. The building was the same, except… she didn’t recognize it. Familiarity didn’t visit. Joy, misery, excitement, indifference, none of those were right either. What did she feel? Numb, maybe… Like a stranger. A stranger in her own life. After spending over three months with Zairn Lomond, touring the global Crimson nightclub network, adjusting to her old life would take time. Zairn’s generosity had afforded her many incredible experiences in different countries. With him, life had been rich with people, vibrant, varied. Same old, same old would be a change of pace. “Miss Kyst?” The man at her side gestured toward the stoop. Another guy stood near the trunk of the Mercedes. The guy next to her was the driver, wasn’t he? So who the hell was the guy at the trunk? Chauffeurs didn’t work in pairs, not for a quick trip from the airport. “I can get my own luggage,” she said when guy number two popped the trunk. “Please, Miss Kyst,” the man next to her said, blocking her way. “You’ll be safer inside.” Ding! Ding! His tone set off an alarm in her head. “Oh my God,” she groaned, her muscles loosening. “You’re security.” “Yes, ma’am.” Well, if that wasn’t just perfect. “Asshole,” she muttered. The guy’s startled reaction wrung a sigh from her. “Not you. What’s your name?” “Trevor,” he said, just as a chunky black Escalade pulled up. Three guys got out and headed toward guy number two at the trunk. “Damnit,” she muttered. “Who are those guys?” Trevor glanced back. “Your team.” “Oh my God.” Roxie marched over to the trunk to snatch out her purse. “Any of you get in my way, I’m not beyond calling the papers to ruin the reputation of the guy signing your paychecks.” Not that the guy who signed their paychecks had the most pristine of reputations to protect. Don’t stress about it. Take a breath and carry on. On her walk toward the stairs, someone leaped into her path. “Roxie! Roxie!” Pausing, she recoiled. “Why the hell are you shouting? I’m standing right here.” Short, a little smarmy, keen. Yep. This guy was familiar, and not because they’d met before. With experience, his type was easy to spot. “Got your notebook?” He held up his phone, ready and eager to type in her words. She cleared her throat and leaned in. “No comment.” The guy’s smile fell, which formed hers. “Get a real job.” Walking into her building had never been so eventful. She climbed the exterior stairs, digging around in her purse for the keys. When was the last time she’d unlocked a door? Stupid overstuffed, unorganized purse. Unfortunately, Zairn’s diamond security pass around her neck didn’t work on ye-olde-fashioned key locks. He’d spoiled her. After turning the key and casting Trevor into the role of doorstop, she ascended the stairs. The guys would bring her luggage. Her friends were upstairs. Normality. Sanity. If someone was home, the apartment should be unlocked… Were they home? Yes! Thank God that hadn’t changed; no key required. Inside, a big “welcome back” banner hung between the windows on the far wall. Her friends, wearing party hats and blowing noisemakers, leaped from the couch to run over. There it was. Home. Her girls were her home. Two seconds over the threshold and already there were tears in her eyes. “You guys…” she said, dropping her purse to pull both of them into a hug. “I missed you so much.” Moisture rolled from her lashes. Her girls. Home. They were her lifeline. Her beacon of hope. Her stability. Everything would be alright again; her girls were all she needed. “Oh no,” Jane said when Roxie finally freed them. “You’re crying! Why are you crying?” Jane was quick to hug her again. “I’d cry too if I was forced to leave Zairn Lomond in California,” Toria said. “If I was forced to leave him anywhere.” Waking up with him in LA felt more like a mirage than reality. Roxie hadn’t left him in the Golden State. She’d left him on his plane, in his bedroom… a million miles and a million minutes away. Maybe that was a hallucination too. “I’m happy to see you both,” Roxie said, kissing Jane and then Toria. “They’re happy tears.” Her roommates helped swipe them away. A knock at the door interrupted the trio. “Damnit,” Roxie muttered, wiping her cheeks one last time before opening the slightly ajar front door. As expected, Trevor and two of his associates stood with her luggage. “Down there…” She stepped back to point at the hallway leading off the living room. The bedrooms, bathroom, and laundry were located that way. “Last door on the right.” Moving aside, she let the men go in the indicated direction. “Wow,” Toria said. “You have a staff.” “They are not my staff,” Roxie said. “Zairn has his panties in a bunch over this Gambatto thing. Speaking of, do you know where Porter’s staying?” “The city put him up at a hotel,” Toria said. “The Grand, I think, which is funny because that’s where Crimson sent us.” Roxie cringed. “I’m sorry about that. It was pure insanity.” “I didn’t mind,” Jane said. “It was nice not to have chores for a while.” Yeah, right. She wasn’t buying it. Jane lived for chores. “Girl, please, you brought gloves and your homemade cleaning spray. That room’s never been so germ-free.” Sounded more like it. “Hey, that makes me happy. I’m glad everything’s the way I left it. Everyone’s just the same,” Roxie said, putting an arm around each of her friends. “We’re back to our same old, normal boring life.” “No! No way,” Toria said, dragging her across the room. “We want every single detail. You’ve been jetting all over the world with like the hottest guy on the planet. We want to know everything about him.” The security guys reappeared and loitered at the mouth of the hallway as Roxie and her roommates settled themselves on the couch. “I know you’re not waiting for a tip,” Roxie said. “One of you can stand outside the door. That’s it.” Two of them headed that way. Trevor came over, fishing something from his pocket. He held up a metal cylinder on a short chain. “Mr. Lomond requires you to carry—” “What the hell is that?” Roxie asked. “A panic button.” She rolled her eyes upward. “Oh, for the love of…” Rising just enough to reach over, she opened her hand. “Give it to me. Just…” She snatched it to toss it onto the coffee table. Before he could say a word, she spoke. “There’s a reason he didn’t give it to me himself.” Trevor frowned. “It wasn’t because he trusted your ability to appease me. It was because he didn’t want the earache.” She tilted her head to the side. “Do you want the earache, Trevor? Do you?” “No, ma’am.” She shooed him with a wave. Something occurred to her before he got to the door. “Trevor?” “Miss Kyst?” Her eyes narrowed on the panic button. “Mr. Lomond didn’t request I carry that. Sean Ballard did…” When there was no answer, she twisted to look at Trevor over the back of the couch. “You can tell him I was super accommodating. He’ll never believe you, but you can tell him.” He nodded and left, closing the door at his back. “Oh my God,” Toria said, both she and Jane drawing in closer. “You know Sean Ballard!” “I know him,” Roxie said, wriggling out from between her friends to go around the couch and into the kitchen by the front door. “Do we have wine, tequila, anything alcoholic?” White wine in the fridge. Score! A little liquid libation suited her mood. She grabbed the bottle and another of red from the counter. Couldn’t have too much on hand. Re-entry was unsettling. “Do you want to go out tonight?” Toria asked. “We thought we could hit the bars.” Jane laughed. “Maybe after being a VIP at Crimson, our usual haunts are beneath her.” It was good-hearted; Jane was just playing. Roxie mustered a smile as she put the bottles on the coffee table and headed back to the kitchen. “We can go out if you want,” she said, grabbing glasses and a corkscrew. “Not sure what my new henchmen will think of that. And there’s a reporter outside.” “Yeah, it was him who told us you were on your way home,” Jane said. “How do they know stuff like that?” Roxie put down the glasses and kneeled on the floor at the coffee table opposite her girls on the couch. “It’s amazing the things they find out,” she said, twisting the corkscrew into the bottle of red. “They pay for it… or blackmail for it… Or they wait until you’re stupid enough to leave your computer streaming for the entire planet to see.” “Were you just mortified?” Jane asked. “I didn’t even know about it until nine days later. Z didn’t let anyone in to see me. i***t me didn’t think much about it when I was sick. He and the doctor were the only two people I saw, no one else. Astrid would’ve told me, that girl can’t keep a secret for anything…” She thought about their conversation forever ago on the plane. “Well, she can keep a secret, just not something like that.” “Z?” Toria said, drawing it out in a tease. “You call him Z?” “I’ve called him worse,” Roxie said, pouring wine for Toria, then pushing it toward her. “So have a lot of other people.” “Tell us what he’s like,” Jane said. Her focus stayed on opening the white wine. “I’ve been away from home for three months! My days have been splashed across screens all over the world. You know what I’ve been doing. What’s been going on here? Catch me up.” “There is like nothing fun going on here,” Toria said. “I started sleeping with Simon again.” “Oh, hey, he was cool.” “Well, yeah, then I went into hiding and had to stop calling.” Roxie winced. “Oops. Sorry.” “It’s okay,” Toria said, scooping up her glass and sinking against the back of the couch. “I wasn’t that into him. But…” She shook a finger at Jane. “But she… she’s been messing with London Guy.” “I have to message Graham for work,” Jane said, accepting the wine from Roxie when she rose high on her knees to hand it over the table. “Is he the one you had webcam s*x with?” Roxie asked. “If that’s being professional these days, I’m definitely re-entering the workplace as soon as possible.” Toria burst out laughing as Jane blustered and blushed. Roxie had missed her girls. Being home was a comfort. Everything was as it always had been… wasn’t it?